Was almost going to log off when an msn window popped out. Am really surprised that he actually read my blog to find out on if I'm adapting well in the new environment.. Wa.. one with a shepherd heart! He might be appeared to be different from the rest to a certain extent (you won't use typical to describe him!) , but guessed that I've gotten used to it after so long and yes ya, appreciate his cranky humor at times.. one of the rare few members I would miss from the cg.
Alright, though we have our fair share of differences in the past few years while being in the same cg, he is really one of the brothers that you can rely/ depend his words on. A true friend, one who is fiercely loyal to his friends.. (like the samurai - loyal warrior..) But hey bro, if you are still reading this, thanks for your words of encouragement (and your faith in me... ) and also your free computer-related assistance too! . Ganbatte for your vision in Japan too! Don't ninja me the next time i see you at the nel in the morning! (though usually you be gone in a flash once the door opens!)
Thanks for everything.. :)
Wednesday, 30 July 2008
Tuesday, 29 July 2008
Silence...
I think there are some silent readers out there.. T_T" Wonder who is reading what what? Some told me that they actually know me better via this little virtual space I called my own.. (the silent readers who read silently and msn me.. AND have a daunting nitemare.. I was pretty shocked by that.. thank goodness never had nitemare over that.. - I'd the first hand encounter..Tell me about part II of the nitemare alright?
Was reading xiaxue's blog. Not that I'm her fan or what but what she wrote about is indeed entertaining.. (sans some of the sensitive words used...) Alrite, part of the Singaporean blood in me that aids me to appreciate that.. though i do think the dawn law suit saga is so for publicity .. and wonder will it go to court for hearing or end with a settlement/ mediation? haha.. entertaining for the readers though... Oh well., life and death lies with the tongue , in the internet sense.. life and death lies with the fingers and keyboard, and your nerves sending the signal to your brain to click.. "Publish".
Totally random post.. just trying to distract myself from doing what I ought to be doing.. Like reading the Brunei & S'pore DTA (i don't like treaty language.) - work-related stuff (and ya, urgently required action upon which is why I brought it home but really have no mood to read) , reading more constructive stuff OR.. sleeping..OR praying.. OR practise the two songs for the Aug 18 performance (AND I still creak. still.. )
And.. the best thing I can do now is.. log off... & be less sentimental.. T_T"
Was reading xiaxue's blog. Not that I'm her fan or what but what she wrote about is indeed entertaining.. (sans some of the sensitive words used...) Alrite, part of the Singaporean blood in me that aids me to appreciate that.. though i do think the dawn law suit saga is so for publicity .. and wonder will it go to court for hearing or end with a settlement/ mediation? haha.. entertaining for the readers though... Oh well., life and death lies with the tongue , in the internet sense.. life and death lies with the fingers and keyboard, and your nerves sending the signal to your brain to click.. "Publish".
Totally random post.. just trying to distract myself from doing what I ought to be doing.. Like reading the Brunei & S'pore DTA (i don't like treaty language.) - work-related stuff (and ya, urgently required action upon which is why I brought it home but really have no mood to read) , reading more constructive stuff OR.. sleeping..OR praying.. OR practise the two songs for the Aug 18 performance (AND I still creak. still.. )
And.. the best thing I can do now is.. log off... & be less sentimental.. T_T"
Flabbergasted!!
Itchy hand of mine decided to include in my email to my pt that I'm going for the 6km run. I think he holds me in high regards ... just read his reply.. he set me a target - complete it within 30minutes.. Eh.. I'm still in shock.. but actually, think it can be done... it's just in the mind.. and actually it's still up to me though, he won't be there and he won't know... but somehow, the crazy part in me just wanna try it out though..
sad ah, why oh why did I inform him? T_T"
sad ah, why oh why did I inform him? T_T"
Monday, 28 July 2008
the dream is still alive...
It's that dreaded time of the month.. (the periodic event where the species with XX chromosomes might behave cranky & react when upon triggers.. )And think three individuals did it today! Alright, I'd tried not to give it to them.. hence my response[s] were rather direct (and not my usual cutie & humoring reply..) T_T". Since it was that dreaded time, almost didn't want to wake up & ya, attempt on starting my new healthy habit.. but oh yeah, I did managed to crucify the flesh and ran 3km (in midst of abs pains & ...)
Crimson affair aside, it was a great weekend.. Cg outing on Saturday.. [For the very first time in 2008, I enjoyed & looked forward to cg outing.. Alright, it's with my new cg.] Not really new to all though... think I know 70% of them. Am in the process of getting know the rest .. :)
Sunday morning was the usual porridge day.. Had been patronising this stall @ Chinatown Food Centre since as far as my memory can recollect (cuz my granddad - who passed away before I was even born) used to be selling flowers next to this porridge stall way way before my era.. so ya, my mom grew up eating their porridge, so ya, me too.. :) And ya, think this stall won the top award for viewers choice of the best porridge for one of Channel U's foodie programme.. Hmmm used to love the pork porridge.. but ever since the recent healthy conversion, discovered that the fish porridge is actually tastier than the pork version which I had been eating for the past twenty plus years.. :) hmm and I love their 鱼生 too.. :)
Bumped into ivory's kai on the train after brekkie.. A coincidence indeed. [Though my flesh says.. siam.. alright, the mode which jadyn accurately pointed out still prevails - (the-i-wanna-siam-leaders-mode).] Hmmm get to know him a bitsy more.. (oh well.. cannot just sit there and stone rite? Afterall, he's ivory's kai and ya, now same cg - sorta.. cuz same cgl. :) so ya, making an effort to overcome the [hurting] wounds..
I thought I had gotten over the hurts/ disappointments already, after almost 7 months . Yet, it was during the new worship song on sunday whereby i was brought to realisation that another Goliath stood in the way - the disappointments towards.. sigh.. the ex-cg which I have sorta suppressed. Despite of how much I done (hmmm it's like past 2-3 years was of the no-time-for-yourself-kinda-life.. (hmm if u know what i mean, u will noe, if u don't, whatever...the pitfall- i neglect the fact to rest... ) and their overall sentiments i felt towards my sudden disappearing act - was the alternative title of that green day song "time of my life". (save for maybe a few.. like the "sweet" one who actually bought me a "farewell" gift ~ despite my silent departure.. and yes, his words of encouragement.. which ya, I do appreciate.. )
He asked me... at then end of the day, who & why are you doing these for? the members? the leaders? Actually, it's for Me. I was T_T" . I know.. but the human ego wants to be fed, yet not. And my blatant refusal to rest (the initial reason for the "retirement") led to yes, current state. Sigh.. yet, those who are in resting mode, when given the opportunity to do more, dodges. T_T". Was actually quite surprised that I sorta shared with weiling the reason why I went over to her side. Okie, not the Goliath story la.. but ya, the main gist that seemed comprehensible & reasonable to most. And oh yes, starting to click with her.. :)
And the service was :). Almost did not want to respond - the face issue, was sitting with the choir peeps (despite I was like a hand throw away from the stage.. but decided to after it was like almost the end.. yesh, i'm like a mule at times). I realised that.. the dream is still alive .. (yay.. the wilson phillips odie song that i like.. T_T"), just that i chose to chunk it aside of the derailing.. (the self-inflicted consequences..) But at least, now i can see the light at the end of the dark tunnel which I was trapped for the past 7 months of 2008. At the very least, I am starting to pick up the pieces where I'd left behind.. and walk again.. (before picking up the pace to run again... )
Crimson affair aside, it was a great weekend.. Cg outing on Saturday.. [For the very first time in 2008, I enjoyed & looked forward to cg outing.. Alright, it's with my new cg.] Not really new to all though... think I know 70% of them. Am in the process of getting know the rest .. :)
Sunday morning was the usual porridge day.. Had been patronising this stall @ Chinatown Food Centre since as far as my memory can recollect (cuz my granddad - who passed away before I was even born) used to be selling flowers next to this porridge stall way way before my era.. so ya, my mom grew up eating their porridge, so ya, me too.. :) And ya, think this stall won the top award for viewers choice of the best porridge for one of Channel U's foodie programme.. Hmmm used to love the pork porridge.. but ever since the recent healthy conversion, discovered that the fish porridge is actually tastier than the pork version which I had been eating for the past twenty plus years.. :) hmm and I love their 鱼生 too.. :)
Bumped into ivory's kai on the train after brekkie.. A coincidence indeed. [Though my flesh says.. siam.. alright, the mode which jadyn accurately pointed out still prevails - (the-i-wanna-siam-leaders-mode).] Hmmm get to know him a bitsy more.. (oh well.. cannot just sit there and stone rite? Afterall, he's ivory's kai and ya, now same cg - sorta.. cuz same cgl. :) so ya, making an effort to overcome the [hurting] wounds..
I thought I had gotten over the hurts/ disappointments already, after almost 7 months . Yet, it was during the new worship song on sunday whereby i was brought to realisation that another Goliath stood in the way - the disappointments towards.. sigh.. the ex-cg which I have sorta suppressed. Despite of how much I done (hmmm it's like past 2-3 years was of the no-time-for-yourself-kinda-life.. (hmm if u know what i mean, u will noe, if u don't, whatever...the pitfall- i neglect the fact to rest... ) and their overall sentiments i felt towards my sudden disappearing act - was the alternative title of that green day song "time of my life". (save for maybe a few.. like the "sweet" one who actually bought me a "farewell" gift ~ despite my silent departure.. and yes, his words of encouragement.. which ya, I do appreciate.. )He asked me... at then end of the day, who & why are you doing these for? the members? the leaders? Actually, it's for Me. I was T_T" . I know.. but the human ego wants to be fed, yet not. And my blatant refusal to rest (the initial reason for the "retirement") led to yes, current state. Sigh.. yet, those who are in resting mode, when given the opportunity to do more, dodges. T_T". Was actually quite surprised that I sorta shared with weiling the reason why I went over to her side. Okie, not the Goliath story la.. but ya, the main gist that seemed comprehensible & reasonable to most. And oh yes, starting to click with her.. :)
And the service was :). Almost did not want to respond - the face issue, was sitting with the choir peeps (despite I was like a hand throw away from the stage.. but decided to after it was like almost the end.. yesh, i'm like a mule at times). I realised that.. the dream is still alive .. (yay.. the wilson phillips odie song that i like.. T_T"), just that i chose to chunk it aside of the derailing.. (the self-inflicted consequences..) But at least, now i can see the light at the end of the dark tunnel which I was trapped for the past 7 months of 2008. At the very least, I am starting to pick up the pieces where I'd left behind.. and walk again.. (before picking up the pace to run again... )
Shop shop shop...
I promise I will not add to the bursting collection of clothes/shoes.. but I just bought the pair of mary janes that I spotted at Topshop last sat while shopping with Kei. :) Reason being.. I don't have comfortable flats for service (hmmm have been wearing the patent m:phosis pair for like.. eternity ... for the past [lost count] every weekend.. T_T" ) Yay..And saw this cutie lemonhead tee that was like the LAST piece.. so ya, that went into the today's Purchase as well.. And ya.. another bangle to add to the growing collection...(lovely!!)
<
the shopaholic strikes again! hmm time to stop wo..
Sunday, 27 July 2008
Southern Ridges...
Didn't really cover much of the 9 Km trail of the Southern Ridges. Started out from Mount Faber (via taking the bus service 409 up - short cut compared to the original plan to walk up the malang trail... which we walked down after descending from the henderson wave..) Below is a pictorial recall of the morning events..
Snap it away!!
The "wave" on our way back
the Info board ...
>
we spotted some cute puppies on the bridge!
>
Creepie crawlie..(clockwise from left: random two ants on leave, One HUGE ant an a WORM!)Note: the small wormie is not on my arm.. I would have screeeeeeAm! Think it fell on Kei. :O
candid shots..
Gee!! I see my workplace. the blue building on the right. (in the background)
At Jewel Box
Gotcha!
the yellow spotties on the green leaves are actually flowers! :)
Hmmm it was a rather interesting walk. (and yay! I didn't get tanned!! Suncreen works!!) we adjourned to vivocity for lunch, and hehe headed for home after lingering a while in vivo ( uhm.. not exactly where i would want to be during weekends.. cuz i get to be there at least 5 days every week.._ and left Topshop without acquiring that pair of chic flatties.. (the main reason being.. i didn't bring my fff card as well as.. my voucher.. eagerly waiting for monday to arrive..!!)
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made a lovely early dinner for myself.. Salmon with apparagus, carrot & corn kernels.. All fresh.. Healthy & guilt free.. :) For the first in many weeks.. I get the saturday off.. and not serving.. :) well rested... *cuz I fell asleep after 6pm and only work up four hours later..Spent a couple of hours installing the camera software (after so long!!) & uploading the few hundred pix in the camera and editing them.. And ya, let me catch some winks before waking up for brekkie @ 7! :)
Saturday, 26 July 2008
sleep.. i think I'm deprived of it..
I wonder why am i wide awake, in front of my monitor (OH yeah, I'm stil using a desktop @ home, cuz my flat screen monitor of 5 years have refused to die and the ibm of 2 years plus is gOing on strong!) when i was so tired after meeting clarinda @ ikea.. (we ate, talk & caught up till like 10pm and walked thru ikea for half an hr.. great evening.. bad food ate and have to be accounted - you do know that the chicken wings @ the ikea resturant is finger-licking good - and ya, that gotta be accounted.. !) I guessed i was too tired by the blasting upper body workout today.. gee.. i was fumbling with the key to open the lock of the locker after that lo. .. T_T" [expensive torture session.. but the weird thing is that.. i like.... ]
Matter of discipline.. to sleep when it's time to.. to wake up when it's time to.. to eat NOT what's not beneficial to the body.. to spend when you ought to.. not when you want/wish to... to qt when it's time to... to not to think/crave for things/object that is out of the question... Things will be easier if we are just programmed.. or ya, not fallen.. sigh.. the first adam.. why u fall? t_t" - the reason i will find out (maybe) when i get there one day.. (Haiz.. I'm crapping..) I miss shopping.. I miss the simple pleasures that a typical singaporean would enjoy.. food.. (though my mantra is i eat to live (not live to eat) , but then i'm still picky.]
Has been chatting with buttercup over msn recently (and the missus as well).. haha think he has a dose of the pms-ness in moi when he tried linking me with the T_T" of the T_T" cuz.. it's too T_T" and to put it in a nicer way, if it was them.. i would rather have the gift of celebacy.. (so evil rite? but.. c'est moi!) and yes, i finally paid $17 for that silly run..(ya, it's on sun but reckon it won't be too tough to still sing after the run.. )
Oh gee.. it's 2:19.. and going on the bridge-connector walk with new cg. WOnder if I could wake up @ 6 to perhaps.. a run around pasir ris park 1st before meeting kei?
I really love the songs that's on my imeem playlist rite now..mixture of old & new faves.. I love sugar ray.. (ooo Mark McGrath!! ) but they seemed to be out of action for a time.. the wikipedia says that new works are in the way.. Singfest is nextweekend but haha would love to attend if I could but nah..
alrite.. be disciplined.. .. and cease the silly thought in mind..
Matter of discipline.. to sleep when it's time to.. to wake up when it's time to.. to eat NOT what's not beneficial to the body.. to spend when you ought to.. not when you want/wish to... to qt when it's time to... to not to think/crave for things/object that is out of the question... Things will be easier if we are just programmed.. or ya, not fallen.. sigh.. the first adam.. why u fall? t_t" - the reason i will find out (maybe) when i get there one day.. (Haiz.. I'm crapping..) I miss shopping.. I miss the simple pleasures that a typical singaporean would enjoy.. food.. (though my mantra is i eat to live (not live to eat) , but then i'm still picky.]
Has been chatting with buttercup over msn recently (and the missus as well).. haha think he has a dose of the pms-ness in moi when he tried linking me with the T_T" of the T_T" cuz.. it's too T_T" and to put it in a nicer way, if it was them.. i would rather have the gift of celebacy.. (so evil rite? but.. c'est moi!) and yes, i finally paid $17 for that silly run..(ya, it's on sun but reckon it won't be too tough to still sing after the run.. )
Oh gee.. it's 2:19.. and going on the bridge-connector walk with new cg. WOnder if I could wake up @ 6 to perhaps.. a run around pasir ris park 1st before meeting kei?
I really love the songs that's on my imeem playlist rite now..mixture of old & new faves.. I love sugar ray.. (ooo Mark McGrath!! ) but they seemed to be out of action for a time.. the wikipedia says that new works are in the way.. Singfest is nextweekend but haha would love to attend if I could but nah..
alrite.. be disciplined.. .. and cease the silly thought in mind..
Friday, 25 July 2008
The wet morning...
I fell trap for the sleep devil again.. cuz the weirdo in me decided to pack my "organised" chaos in the middle of the night/ morning after looking high & low for lost earring (and it was found!!).. Spent an hour plus, sorting out junk mails, and ya, bills... and ya, unsorted, un-reproduced pieces of notes taken down during cg/svc (un-reproduced cuz they are supposed to be organised and properly written out in the notebook...) And by the time i'm more or less satisfied with the jewellery organisation.. it was alas! 2:30 AM!!!Alright, I'm "sortsort" (a term i learnt from jy recently.. muah haha!)
so plan to wake up @ 5 foiled.. woke up @ 6plus instead.. so plan to run ~ abolish - delayed to this evening.. :)
And yes... no = no..
so plan to wake up @ 5 foiled.. woke up @ 6plus instead.. so plan to run ~ abolish - delayed to this evening.. :)
And yes... no = no..
Thursday, 24 July 2008
Yay!
I did it ! Without much pushing..just that need to get the momentum. Not too bad, considering i walked 4min before breaking into a not too tedious jog. Did 6km@0.5 incline just under 44min[inclusive walking time]. Sense of satisfaction! :)
procrastination
Yep, have procrastinated big time on this.. for 7 years le..cuz never foresee myself to be doing this for so long and still not too sure how long I'll be in this... hence don't wish to pay the yearly subscription for no reason just to add three more letters to end of my name.. haha.. ya the letters c, p & a.. T_T"
Oh well.. anyway, the subscription can be claimed from the company, might as well go for it right? Alright, think i should do it ba.. afterall slogged three years in ntu ~ not the extent of the study hours&; effort put in - but the sheer torture of doing a course you make no heads &; tails of.. ~ ya, me not an accountant material...[i think when i dispense the tax advices/ treatments.. it's out of inspiration from Holy Spirit.. ya, in tongues.. but then it make sense to the recipient and ya, it is technically sound. ~ Thank God!] I prefer the creative works.. a decision that i have to live with.. ~ still trying to live out that dream...
Oh well.. anyway, the subscription can be claimed from the company, might as well go for it right? Alright, think i should do it ba.. afterall slogged three years in ntu ~ not the extent of the study hours&; effort put in - but the sheer torture of doing a course you make no heads &; tails of.. ~ ya, me not an accountant material...[i think when i dispense the tax advices/ treatments.. it's out of inspiration from Holy Spirit.. ya, in tongues.. but then it make sense to the recipient and ya, it is technically sound. ~ Thank God!] I prefer the creative works.. a decision that i have to live with.. ~ still trying to live out that dream...
Wednesday, 23 July 2008
actual transcend the JD...
JD - Job description.. i.e. your area of responsibilty at work
In fact, aside to the secretary of my department, me = most jr in rank.. Technically speaking, I ought to be doing purely compliance work.. (due to the 'low-iness' of my title...so cannot be in position to offer advices..) Yet, has been roped in with advisory work since day I joined the company.. T_T" cuz of my "wealth" of experience in the area of gst whereby its such a specialised area of tax that actually gave me a competitive edge over the rest of my colleagues (who are more senior than me in age and experience in other tax types..).. but T_T" cuz being labelled the gst specialist meant that anything to do with gst/ vat = my portfolio.. but since some of the stuff were beyond me.. I think usually I spoke/ write in "tongues" in respect of the advices to be dispended.. (Thank God all things are good so far.. )
This morning, saw another email from my GM, directing to my SM & me.. , requesting for a discussion.. I wondered if this was a mistake (cuz it involved like countries with unpronoucable names...) and I realised.. yah, cuz of the VAT issue... t_t" After which, my SM came and asked me for a gst treatment again.. t_t" but alright so far... Anyway, i got this job via speaking in tongues during interview (cuz I really didn't know what i was blabbering about....) so maybe ya, i transcend in this current position by doing things that really requires me to speak in "new yet familar tongues"....
Kinda wonder why the things I'm doing does not equate to my position.. but thank God & the leading by Holy Spirit that I've yet made any major hiccups so far (pertianing to my "expert" - GST take on issues)..
In fact, aside to the secretary of my department, me = most jr in rank.. Technically speaking, I ought to be doing purely compliance work.. (due to the 'low-iness' of my title...so cannot be in position to offer advices..) Yet, has been roped in with advisory work since day I joined the company.. T_T" cuz of my "wealth" of experience in the area of gst whereby its such a specialised area of tax that actually gave me a competitive edge over the rest of my colleagues (who are more senior than me in age and experience in other tax types..).. but T_T" cuz being labelled the gst specialist meant that anything to do with gst/ vat = my portfolio.. but since some of the stuff were beyond me.. I think usually I spoke/ write in "tongues" in respect of the advices to be dispended.. (Thank God all things are good so far.. )
This morning, saw another email from my GM, directing to my SM & me.. , requesting for a discussion.. I wondered if this was a mistake (cuz it involved like countries with unpronoucable names...) and I realised.. yah, cuz of the VAT issue... t_t" After which, my SM came and asked me for a gst treatment again.. t_t" but alright so far... Anyway, i got this job via speaking in tongues during interview (cuz I really didn't know what i was blabbering about....) so maybe ya, i transcend in this current position by doing things that really requires me to speak in "new yet familar tongues"....
Kinda wonder why the things I'm doing does not equate to my position.. but thank God & the leading by Holy Spirit that I've yet made any major hiccups so far (pertianing to my "expert" - GST take on issues)..
Tuesday, 22 July 2008
sinful glob..
shhh... couldn't resist this so I'd this as a sweet ending to my lunch after much persuasion from my colleague.. it's one scoop of Ben & Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk!! Hmmm after e's review of my weekend food consumption (Wa.. durian is a big NO.. even a teeny weeny seed - sad ah.. xj, i should have eaten more last fri!).. don't want to kill myself by letting him know about this gulity treat.. but then.. contemplating to log it down if there no dinner tonite.. (so it won't look that bad..) Can't really have the heart to tell a half-truth.. aniwae.. it's for my own benefit.. Okie.. don't question me why am i spending money to get another person to coach me.. well.. if you need to improve yourself, and you aren't the expert/ professional, you will pay right.. {Just like some of my friends who engaged voice coaches to improve their techniques...okie, if I've the extra mulah.. i won't mind too... But for me.. priority is to fix up the temple first.. (eh.. remember, our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit..) so yep..
buttercup hulk is really onz about the marathon thingy.. mrs buttercup.. think you can't escape too.. no worries.. it's only the 6km this time.. think come December 7, he will make you join him for at least the 10km one.. haha..
buttercup hulk is really onz about the marathon thingy.. mrs buttercup.. think you can't escape too.. no worries.. it's only the 6km this time.. think come December 7, he will make you join him for at least the 10km one.. haha..
Monday, 21 July 2008
Will...
Smith... ah... my 偶像!! Alright, I know he ain't the drop dead gorgeous type.. but i can really swoon over him.. charmed by his goofy kinda jokes from fresh prince of bel-air era (okie.. youngersters will be thinking generation-gap.., but not really, i was pretty young while that was showing on air... .)but hey, think his acting improved lotsa over the years..
Alright, I admit that I will myself to catch hancock not having the slightest idea of the storyline (except it's a superhero typesy show) but main attraction is obv the male lead... And not being bias.. I usually enjoyed the shows with will in it.. really...and this is no exception...
but it was really entertaining.. and hilarious at times.. and yet.. thought provoking too.. to choose between love and heeding your calling.. woo.. like flesh vs spirit.. T_T" [enuff said]
Next movie looking forward to Wall-e (like the way wall-e pronouces his name..)
Alright, I admit that I will myself to catch hancock not having the slightest idea of the storyline (except it's a superhero typesy show) but main attraction is obv the male lead... And not being bias.. I usually enjoyed the shows with will in it.. really...and this is no exception...
but it was really entertaining.. and hilarious at times.. and yet.. thought provoking too.. to choose between love and heeding your calling.. woo.. like flesh vs spirit.. T_T" [enuff said]
Next movie looking forward to Wall-e (like the way wall-e pronouces his name..)
the weekend edition
It was a great weekend.. [for a change!!]
happily did my pt, was "discharged" of the cardiovascular exercise for the day..Happily made my way to expo after the luxurious time in the steam bath (okie, not that long.. maybe 15min?)
Was fun serving at expo.. Guessed this would be the usual crowd that I'll see on Sat. :) Attempted to teach a newcomer the walau song.. :) Fun..
After singing.. was attempting to made my way out when this choir bro approached me.. and haha.. asked me for my name (apparently he has always seen me around, but too shy to ask me for my name.. T_T") Tried ways to cut short the conversation but sigh.. he seemed to have free time (even when I tried to take the longer way out via the main hall to Attributes route..) & was praying silently for a way to get myself out of the conversation .. (T_T" maybe he genuniely wanted to get to know more pple lo.. but weird lei.. cuz remembered an occasion after serving expo while on the way out again.. - he commented on my outfit and said i looked great.. T_T" ~ and i only know him by face then!) Thank God for Andy.. who was serving at Attributes then.. who called out me and save the day.. (though he won't know that.. haha! yay! no need to make small talk.. woah! )
Chatted with him for a while.. Great to hear that he & chris were progressing well at another cg in another zone.. woo and both of them are connect group leaders & chris is now in SOT! And I was rather touched that andy actually remembered the little mundane things that I'd done - like the handmade cards, and he reminded me of the testimony that Pris has shared during one of the earlier combined cg we'd earlier this year (in which she was touched by the lil things that I'd done for her when she first came to Singapore...) *blush* Frankly, never thought much of the stuff that I'd done for these past few years.. especially in the ex-cg (ya... EX.. can say officially now.. cuz ya, think people know le.. those who bothered, will ask.. those who don't.. oh well, you know who your true friends are.. ) did & will make an impact in the recipients..
Felt loved & encouraged by the conversation .. :) was reminded by the principle of sowing.. When you sow a seed, it's sown into the deep deep soil, it will take sometime before you see the shoots.. only then, you know that the seed you've sowed weeks/months earlier have not died and became part of the organic compose.. Similarly, the things that we are doing week in week out may seemed mundane & might even appeared to us that we are doing things for no apparent reason or redundant to a certain extent... yet in His timing, all will come into fruition, according to His time..
the new cg.. alright, it may not be the best time for me to join the new cg (actually I still dunno where i am.. ) but oh well.. think I'm settling down alright.. Had an enjoyable lunch with the new cg. Making some progress to click with some of the gals from kei's side.. and ivory's kai so sweet.. went to get lunch & delivered to her (else i think she will be starved! ) hmmm am missing ivory...all in all.. things are progressing well.. looking forward to the outing this sat (though it meant going to harbourfront on my off-sat).. :)
Was surprised by yet another sms this morning.. from max.. not exactly the last person i would expect to ask me if I'd transferred but was surprised that.. there is actually a token of appreciation (i dun reckon it's from the group though).. hmm alright, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter if the people appreciate/ notice/ know, so long God sees.. it's enough..closing that chapter for good. Amazing power of one that can make the deterrence so great. i wish that well.. With that said, happy to move on...
happily did my pt, was "discharged" of the cardiovascular exercise for the day..Happily made my way to expo after the luxurious time in the steam bath (okie, not that long.. maybe 15min?)
Was fun serving at expo.. Guessed this would be the usual crowd that I'll see on Sat. :) Attempted to teach a newcomer the walau song.. :) Fun..
After singing.. was attempting to made my way out when this choir bro approached me.. and haha.. asked me for my name (apparently he has always seen me around, but too shy to ask me for my name.. T_T") Tried ways to cut short the conversation but sigh.. he seemed to have free time (even when I tried to take the longer way out via the main hall to Attributes route..) & was praying silently for a way to get myself out of the conversation .. (T_T" maybe he genuniely wanted to get to know more pple lo.. but weird lei.. cuz remembered an occasion after serving expo while on the way out again.. - he commented on my outfit and said i looked great.. T_T" ~ and i only know him by face then!) Thank God for Andy.. who was serving at Attributes then.. who called out me and save the day.. (though he won't know that.. haha! yay! no need to make small talk.. woah! )
Chatted with him for a while.. Great to hear that he & chris were progressing well at another cg in another zone.. woo and both of them are connect group leaders & chris is now in SOT! And I was rather touched that andy actually remembered the little mundane things that I'd done - like the handmade cards, and he reminded me of the testimony that Pris has shared during one of the earlier combined cg we'd earlier this year (in which she was touched by the lil things that I'd done for her when she first came to Singapore...) *blush* Frankly, never thought much of the stuff that I'd done for these past few years.. especially in the ex-cg (ya... EX.. can say officially now.. cuz ya, think people know le.. those who bothered, will ask.. those who don't.. oh well, you know who your true friends are.. ) did & will make an impact in the recipients..
Felt loved & encouraged by the conversation .. :) was reminded by the principle of sowing.. When you sow a seed, it's sown into the deep deep soil, it will take sometime before you see the shoots.. only then, you know that the seed you've sowed weeks/months earlier have not died and became part of the organic compose.. Similarly, the things that we are doing week in week out may seemed mundane & might even appeared to us that we are doing things for no apparent reason or redundant to a certain extent... yet in His timing, all will come into fruition, according to His time..
the new cg.. alright, it may not be the best time for me to join the new cg (actually I still dunno where i am.. ) but oh well.. think I'm settling down alright.. Had an enjoyable lunch with the new cg. Making some progress to click with some of the gals from kei's side.. and ivory's kai so sweet.. went to get lunch & delivered to her (else i think she will be starved! ) hmmm am missing ivory...all in all.. things are progressing well.. looking forward to the outing this sat (though it meant going to harbourfront on my off-sat).. :)
Was surprised by yet another sms this morning.. from max.. not exactly the last person i would expect to ask me if I'd transferred but was surprised that.. there is actually a token of appreciation (i dun reckon it's from the group though).. hmm alright, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter if the people appreciate/ notice/ know, so long God sees.. it's enough..closing that chapter for good. Amazing power of one that can make the deterrence so great. i wish that well.. With that said, happy to move on...
Saturday, 19 July 2008
Friday night out...
Had a great meeting up with the Goh sisters & Estelle (with special guest star appearance ~ Damien) @ whitesands coffeeclub (I love my yummy cod fish!!) . :) oh well.. these are the few that I'll miss.. but then.. we can still meet up even if not in the same group. :) We adjourned to Estelle's place (to help her finish her choc cake..) and hmmm it was really great to hear each other out.. And was pretty amazed that cutesy janet can speak rather profound as well.. :) ]And june, estelle & me were wearing rather mis-matched shoes ~ phew it was ulu-ulu void deck sitting @ estelle's flat void deck! so unglam!!]
Guessed we just talked and talked..It's good not to bottle things up.. yet ya.. there are a lot of things that we know we ought to do, yet our little pea-brain will be ever so willing to listen the loud decitful voice of mr sa tan, cuz ya, we aren't perfect cuz we are in this broken-down world.. have to make a conscience effort not to be waivered by these thoughts that will block out the still small voice. Yet, when we hear that still small voice - to do or not to do.. Oh well.. man's pea brain are complex in nature...
After the long chat.. I walked round the pasir ris park home.. Didn't want to cut across the dimly lit park (even though it will be much shorter...) but wasn't too long a walk in my high wedge..(now i know how my super calves came about.. walking long distance with calf muscles in arch position.. ! Bad! Tips for guys who wants bigger calf muscles.. haha). Thank God that the drizzle remained a drizzle...
:) will miss these three lovely gals.. :) As for what that has been broken.. it doesn't takes a hand to clap. so if it's meant to have a part III, it will ... else.. so be it.
Guessed we just talked and talked..It's good not to bottle things up.. yet ya.. there are a lot of things that we know we ought to do, yet our little pea-brain will be ever so willing to listen the loud decitful voice of mr sa tan, cuz ya, we aren't perfect cuz we are in this broken-down world.. have to make a conscience effort not to be waivered by these thoughts that will block out the still small voice. Yet, when we hear that still small voice - to do or not to do.. Oh well.. man's pea brain are complex in nature...
After the long chat.. I walked round the pasir ris park home.. Didn't want to cut across the dimly lit park (even though it will be much shorter...) but wasn't too long a walk in my high wedge..(now i know how my super calves came about.. walking long distance with calf muscles in arch position.. ! Bad! Tips for guys who wants bigger calf muscles.. haha). Thank God that the drizzle remained a drizzle...
:) will miss these three lovely gals.. :) As for what that has been broken.. it doesn't takes a hand to clap. so if it's meant to have a part III, it will ... else.. so be it.
Friday, 18 July 2008
...
definition from dictionary.com
[v. in-fach-oo-eyt; adj., n. in-fach-oo-it, -eyt]
–verb (used with object)
–adjective
–noun
[v. in-fach-oo-eyt; adj., n. in-fach-oo-it, -eyt]
uˌeɪt; –verb (used with object)
| 1. | to inspire or possess with a foolish or unreasoning passion, as of love. |
| 2. | to affect with folly; make foolish or fatuous. |
| 3. | infatuated. |
| 4. | a person who is infatuated. |
run...
should i or should i not? Kinda tempted to.. :) won't exactly win the race but dun think I'll be the the bottom last too...
my "motivating"-friend ~ who used nag at me in the pass for not utilising my gym membership, now is on the latest craze to bulk himself up by early morning run & weights training.. (though i cannot imagine big buttercup!)~ had jio-ed me to the safra run with his other cg members....
hmmm think 2 years back, without training, tried the 5km fun run with some of the choir peeps.. haaha it was a rather bad timing (or did i finish?) cuz never trained for it at all.. Hmm come to think of it.. since i've been like running (rather comfortably) ard 4.5 km in 35min.. shouldn't be much of a problem to attempt the 10km run.. and ya, dun think my timing would be that bad ba.. guessitimate less than 1.5 hrs or less?? Hmmm contemplating.. cuz ya, likely putting my name down for the vertical marathon in my company's interSBU games end aug (I think it'll be the same building last year.. the marina bay financial center).. haha..
think i'm turning a health freak.. haha..
my "motivating"-friend ~ who used nag at me in the pass for not utilising my gym membership, now is on the latest craze to bulk himself up by early morning run & weights training.. (though i cannot imagine big buttercup!)~ had jio-ed me to the safra run with his other cg members....
hmmm think 2 years back, without training, tried the 5km fun run with some of the choir peeps.. haaha it was a rather bad timing (or did i finish?) cuz never trained for it at all.. Hmm come to think of it.. since i've been like running (rather comfortably) ard 4.5 km in 35min.. shouldn't be much of a problem to attempt the 10km run.. and ya, dun think my timing would be that bad ba.. guessitimate less than 1.5 hrs or less?? Hmmm contemplating.. cuz ya, likely putting my name down for the vertical marathon in my company's interSBU games end aug (I think it'll be the same building last year.. the marina bay financial center).. haha..
think i'm turning a health freak.. haha..
all things new..
Last evening after work (and the spans of msn with buttercup, kei & my one of dear ex-colleague) ,took a trip down to kei's lovely place with my new cgl..(all right, not exactly new to me..). He was very encouraging and truly like what he says with this move, I ought to move from glory to glory (i.e. not just remain @ status quo). Wasn't interrogated per my wild imagination (guessed he knew what he ought to know from long, and the thing is that I need not get acquainted to him all over again ~ which is one the reason why i chose to "recuperate" in one of his cg.. and yup.. cuz kei is there too..) Found myself @ ease with most of the familiar faces from n320.. and hopefully will get to know the rest slowly.. hmmm perhaps i joined at not the most perfect timing but haiz.. if i don't get out.. you will find me under the spiderwebs & prolly with mould too in the previous cg..
hmmm steven asked if i'd any aspiration to rise up in the choir. Actually, maybe in this season of time.. no preference.. in the long run ~ nope. Anyway.. it'll take a long time to be officially an AH (jimmy took a year. haha!), oh well.. title doesn't matter la.. with it comes yes, responsibility and more admin (which pose no major issue to me..haha). And told him I'm still in choir still cuz ya, at the moment, didn't want to be spiritually unemployed..
Hmmm at least there are strong matured sisters ard in this cg.. so ya, think the journey to recovery should be expedited.. let me settle in first though.. at least am in a place that I can see myself growing..
Kei, thanks for being my listening ear wo.. :)
What's done can't be undone.. What's broken, even when mended, there will be a scar. Yet.. scars make us stronger for life..
hmmm steven asked if i'd any aspiration to rise up in the choir. Actually, maybe in this season of time.. no preference.. in the long run ~ nope. Anyway.. it'll take a long time to be officially an AH (jimmy took a year. haha!), oh well.. title doesn't matter la.. with it comes yes, responsibility and more admin (which pose no major issue to me..haha). And told him I'm still in choir still cuz ya, at the moment, didn't want to be spiritually unemployed..
Hmmm at least there are strong matured sisters ard in this cg.. so ya, think the journey to recovery should be expedited.. let me settle in first though.. at least am in a place that I can see myself growing..
Kei, thanks for being my listening ear wo.. :)
What's done can't be undone.. What's broken, even when mended, there will be a scar. Yet.. scars make us stronger for life..
Corrine May ~ Scars (Stronger for Life)
I just want to run
Just want to hide away
Close my eyes to your gaze
Just want to leave
Don't want to hear them say
"You're no good at this"
When the world swirls with naysayers
Broken wings and torn pages
The road ahead
Drowning in my tears
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life
Losing myself
Gaining it back again
Forging strength from weakness
All that I am
All that I'm meant to be
Melting in your hand
Let the world swirl with naysayers
Pickled hearts and sour faces
What is real is what I cannot see
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life
Cut away
All within me
That won't bear fruit
Cut away
All within me
Cut away
All within me
That won't bear fruit
Cut away
All within me
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger
Scars make us stronger for life
Just want to hide away
Close my eyes to your gaze
Just want to leave
Don't want to hear them say
"You're no good at this"
When the world swirls with naysayers
Broken wings and torn pages
The road ahead
Drowning in my tears
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life
Losing myself
Gaining it back again
Forging strength from weakness
All that I am
All that I'm meant to be
Melting in your hand
Let the world swirl with naysayers
Pickled hearts and sour faces
What is real is what I cannot see
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life
Cut away
All within me
That won't bear fruit
Cut away
All within me
Cut away
All within me
That won't bear fruit
Cut away
All within me
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger
Scars make us stronger for life
:)
saw a sleeping *beauty* this morning that makes me :). was really deep in slumber.. how envious...
*okie, the beauty was not exactly prettyface cuz its someone with XY chromosome! T_T"
*okie, the beauty was not exactly prettyface cuz its someone with XY chromosome! T_T"
Thursday, 17 July 2008
a campfire song
random campfire/scout song that came into my head during lunch hour.. substitute some of the words (one of them sounds like the word peace) and that reflects how I am feeling... [now]
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river in my soul (in my soul)
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river in my soul..
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river in my soul (in my soul)
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river
I've got peace like a river in my soul..
the one about "tossing"
Yup.. tossed...currently "orphaned"... Yet have to put on a :) in spite of...
I wonder how things would turn out.. I'm actually asking where I ought to be going.. when ya, usually p[ple] in this situation would just wait & [see]. Contemplated to give it a miss until all sorted out but couldn't live with the "lo-bo-ness"... T_T"
me to tag along for the "byebye" event next week? I rather not to seriously... cuz like what I told L, the event is for p[ple] heading out for genuine reason (in this case, all cuz of their better halves).. mine is more of " 跑路 " less cuz of new ground. And it will be major time will heal ba..
hmmm small things in mailbox make me :). Might not mean a lot to the sender but in the eyes of the recipent, it may do wonders!!
I wonder how things would turn out.. I'm actually asking where I ought to be going.. when ya, usually p[ple] in this situation would just wait & [see]. Contemplated to give it a miss until all sorted out but couldn't live with the "lo-bo-ness"... T_T"
me to tag along for the "byebye" event next week? I rather not to seriously... cuz like what I told L, the event is for p[ple] heading out for genuine reason (in this case, all cuz of their better halves).. mine is more of " 跑路 " less cuz of new ground. And it will be major time will heal ba..
hmmm small things in mailbox make me :). Might not mean a lot to the sender but in the eyes of the recipent, it may do wonders!!
Wednesday, 16 July 2008
honored...
Was pleasantly surprised to learn that my dear neighbour as work used me as an example to illustrate a point in her sermon that she preached in her cg last week.. (I was like T_T")
Cuz I was encouraging her to go gym when she didn't really feel like doing so.. and (yup, she did and she felt good after "cruxifying" her flesh to go gym) haha.. she used me as an example that how important it is to have someone to motivate you.. and yep, people actually pay for PT to motivate them to exercise ~ actually that's not my motive of paying for pt but rather due to my sweetbloodcondition.. have to be cautious ma... (not too sure what's the title of her message but ... i reckon it have to do with importance of motivation? maybe to growth?? haha.. )
haha.. dun think her cg members would know who am i... haha.. :)
hmmm u never know who you will impact with your words & actions.. :)
wednesday... adult choir prac day... :) tata
Cuz I was encouraging her to go gym when she didn't really feel like doing so.. and (yup, she did and she felt good after "cruxifying" her flesh to go gym) haha.. she used me as an example that how important it is to have someone to motivate you.. and yep, people actually pay for PT to motivate them to exercise ~ actually that's not my motive of paying for pt but rather due to my sweetbloodcondition.. have to be cautious ma... (not too sure what's the title of her message but ... i reckon it have to do with importance of motivation? maybe to growth?? haha.. )
haha.. dun think her cg members would know who am i... haha.. :)
hmmm u never know who you will impact with your words & actions.. :)
wednesday... adult choir prac day... :) tata
Tuesday, 15 July 2008
yeah.. i made it...
Despite of the fact that I only slept close to 2am.. managed to rouse myself from slumberland at 5am. (cuz I snoozed it a while.. scrumbled to my feet at 5:45 (unwillingly...) and yep, finally grabbed my breakfast (which was a huge rOse apple I'd dug out of the fridge ~ dun think i wanna run on empty stomach) and managed to get out of the house by 6:12. Thank God I've graduated.. I pity the kids waiting for the bus to head on to school.. Realised that bus frequency prior to 7am is like... 15min apart.. and the strange thing was that despite many buses ply by that bus stop.. they almost all arrive at the same time (in other words, you miss one.. you miss all..) Oh well.. perhaps I should walk to the mrt station the next time..
oh well.. amazingly, my body was awaken after I hit the treadmill..Due to insufficient time (I only have slightly more than an hour to run/shower/makeup), decided to just do a 30 min run.. hmm quite satisified la.. covered ard 4.4km in 35min.. despite just sleeping for 3+ hours. (Incidentally, buttercup lost his coke zero cuz I did succeeded in going to the gym!) hmmm wasn't really late for work.. so ya, it's a feasible idea.. just need to cruixfy my flesh (And still I'm not a morning person... so spiritual exercise best left to night.. )
Oh well.. looking forward to the bak kut teh dinner with jimmy (& maybe jieyin & wanling) later before prac... (at least it's soupy.. I'll not consume the fat though.. haha... ) Always wanted to try it whenever I walked pass it on my way to bs.. but never have the chance.. so hehe... yay!!
oh well.. amazingly, my body was awaken after I hit the treadmill..Due to insufficient time (I only have slightly more than an hour to run/shower/makeup), decided to just do a 30 min run.. hmm quite satisified la.. covered ard 4.4km in 35min.. despite just sleeping for 3+ hours. (Incidentally, buttercup lost his coke zero cuz I did succeeded in going to the gym!) hmmm wasn't really late for work.. so ya, it's a feasible idea.. just need to cruixfy my flesh (And still I'm not a morning person... so spiritual exercise best left to night.. )
Oh well.. looking forward to the bak kut teh dinner with jimmy (& maybe jieyin & wanling) later before prac... (at least it's soupy.. I'll not consume the fat though.. haha... ) Always wanted to try it whenever I walked pass it on my way to bs.. but never have the chance.. so hehe... yay!!
Monday, 14 July 2008
the one about awkwardness..
*blush* think pink is my colour.. haha valerie & carmen commented that I look good on sat.. *blush*
Oh well.. awkwardness.. yep, indeed it was.. Imagine the old was in front of the new.. Sigh.. I turned my back to the old and talked to kedy.. . And the best thing was that the old almost came sit where the new sat at the kopitiam. T_T"
June was sweet.. Damien & her came over when they were about to leave.. (June said in her sms that she wanted to hug me but I looked subdued.. hehe.. anyway meeting her for dinner this fri.. woo.. my dear jr from sec sch... perhaps that's why I find it so easy to talk to her.. haha.. the dhs spirit.. hehe)
hmm the new environment was good.. :) Had a good fellowship with the small group of them and the cgl as well.. Hmm he has yet spoken to me regarding my transfer .. Guess that it will be sooner or later.. not too sure how much he knows.. but then.. he super discerning.. so... tsk tsk...
was extremely tired when i got home last night.. Fell into deep slumber when i plonked onto the bed at 9+ and slept through till 6plus this morning.. :)
Another busy week awaits.. :) ~
shall attempt to hit the gym early next morning.... review of the "pig-out" on sat evening with corinth isn't very well with e. :( yep, discipline shall be it..
Oh well.. awkwardness.. yep, indeed it was.. Imagine the old was in front of the new.. Sigh.. I turned my back to the old and talked to kedy.. . And the best thing was that the old almost came sit where the new sat at the kopitiam. T_T"
June was sweet.. Damien & her came over when they were about to leave.. (June said in her sms that she wanted to hug me but I looked subdued.. hehe.. anyway meeting her for dinner this fri.. woo.. my dear jr from sec sch... perhaps that's why I find it so easy to talk to her.. haha.. the dhs spirit.. hehe)
hmm the new environment was good.. :) Had a good fellowship with the small group of them and the cgl as well.. Hmm he has yet spoken to me regarding my transfer .. Guess that it will be sooner or later.. not too sure how much he knows.. but then.. he super discerning.. so... tsk tsk...
was extremely tired when i got home last night.. Fell into deep slumber when i plonked onto the bed at 9+ and slept through till 6plus this morning.. :)
Another busy week awaits.. :) ~
shall attempt to hit the gym early next morning.... review of the "pig-out" on sat evening with corinth isn't very well with e. :( yep, discipline shall be it..
Sunday, 13 July 2008
i ought not to.. but I still...
okie.. man is of fallen nature.. hence, they aren't perfect.. They have the tendency to do things that they ought not to.. Sigh.. imaginations dun run wild.... (oh yeah, I'm very imaginative... ) It doesn't help that there are ample opportunities and yes. it was certainly fun.. Tsk.. oh well.. not gonna focus on that.. it will pass really.. And ya. I think I've taken a liking towards golden kiwi instead of blueberry.. took a really long while to get past blueberry stage.. haha.. :)
And I heard an interesting perception of my church.. It's very A-tas... Eh?? That's something new.. counteract by inviting to visit .. haha.. he sorta out-rightly reject.. (cuz he don't wanna "malu" me cuz he doze off easily..) haha but think that idea of being kept occupied with church stuff on weekends sorta appeal to him (cuz if not for work.. haha he has no life one.~ described to me his typical off day..).. haha shall try to work on him... haha at least not total close deal.. but let me re-establish the relationship first (cuz haven't met in the last 4 years ma..). And ya, think what I wore yesterday was more party than work cuz he still think that it's too "happening" to don for work.. (haha...like club wear... T_T" )
Think my typical sat will be that routine.. but it's good la.. At least for healthy for me.. Think my lower body won't hurt that much this week.. cuz he decided to target on the killer.. the arms. come to think of it.. it was full body.. haha.. but he treated me to a good after-workout stretching so maybe it won't hurt that much lor.. haha... :)
It was a real kick p&W.. one new praise song-ktt (the same song i heard in the Indonesian service when Pastor Synedy came which i sneak in during pnw.. ) & the new worship song which i didn't get to learn (cuz arrive to only hear them sing the last line of chorus..) And ya, the dear cameraman decided to zoom in to me again (actually i sorta knew he was aiming at me during the verse, but we weren't singing as ally was doing solo so he walked away... then he came back again after we repeated the verse... and I don't know how the lyrics and melody.. cuz that was the 1st time i heard the song!) T_T" but Corithin (aka lian) said wa got glory lei.. (ya she saw my zoomed-in big face!) >.< ( and i was trying to bear with the pain from my pretty but tight dkny boots.. Vanity.. thy pain to go thru cuz of vanity..)
Had a very fruitful & enjoyable dinner @ the bedok pizza hut. Like the ambiance.. reminded me of the Siglap one.. Preferred these than those in shopping centers.. cuz more relax.. haha chatted for a looong time.. haven't have chance to spend quality time with her le.. haha oh well.. still good friends ma.. just not in the same "immediate spiritual family".. and the warm choc cake was yummy.. there's even steam emerging from the middle of the cake.. (though it took like 10mins to arrive...) Left at ard 9+ wa.. spent ard 3 hrs there.. haha time just flew...
cuz of the fat-laden meal.. decided to walk home.. took the e route i'd visualise to be.. Sigh.. ask and it shall be given.. next time.. but then.. was reminded of the little promise I'd made that will persist till end oct and this is certainly not right and ya, distraction... alright.. gotta be focus.. afterall, am in transition once again..
hehe, june is so sweet to arrange for a hot date with me after learning on my migration.. :) will certainly miss her lo.. must write her a love letter.. haha.. then damien will be jealous.. haha..
oh well.. closed that chapter in life.. at least there are things I can look forward in.. Slaying the Goliath once i found my sling and 5 stones..
And I heard an interesting perception of my church.. It's very A-tas... Eh?? That's something new.. counteract by inviting to visit .. haha.. he sorta out-rightly reject.. (cuz he don't wanna "malu" me cuz he doze off easily..) haha but think that idea of being kept occupied with church stuff on weekends sorta appeal to him (cuz if not for work.. haha he has no life one.~ described to me his typical off day..).. haha shall try to work on him... haha at least not total close deal.. but let me re-establish the relationship first (cuz haven't met in the last 4 years ma..). And ya, think what I wore yesterday was more party than work cuz he still think that it's too "happening" to don for work.. (haha...like club wear... T_T" )
Think my typical sat will be that routine.. but it's good la.. At least for healthy for me.. Think my lower body won't hurt that much this week.. cuz he decided to target on the killer.. the arms. come to think of it.. it was full body.. haha.. but he treated me to a good after-workout stretching so maybe it won't hurt that much lor.. haha... :)
It was a real kick p&W.. one new praise song-ktt (the same song i heard in the Indonesian service when Pastor Synedy came which i sneak in during pnw.. ) & the new worship song which i didn't get to learn (cuz arrive to only hear them sing the last line of chorus..) And ya, the dear cameraman decided to zoom in to me again (actually i sorta knew he was aiming at me during the verse, but we weren't singing as ally was doing solo so he walked away... then he came back again after we repeated the verse... and I don't know how the lyrics and melody.. cuz that was the 1st time i heard the song!) T_T" but Corithin (aka lian) said wa got glory lei.. (ya she saw my zoomed-in big face!) >.< ( and i was trying to bear with the pain from my pretty but tight dkny boots.. Vanity.. thy pain to go thru cuz of vanity..)
Had a very fruitful & enjoyable dinner @ the bedok pizza hut. Like the ambiance.. reminded me of the Siglap one.. Preferred these than those in shopping centers.. cuz more relax.. haha chatted for a looong time.. haven't have chance to spend quality time with her le.. haha oh well.. still good friends ma.. just not in the same "immediate spiritual family".. and the warm choc cake was yummy.. there's even steam emerging from the middle of the cake.. (though it took like 10mins to arrive...) Left at ard 9+ wa.. spent ard 3 hrs there.. haha time just flew...
cuz of the fat-laden meal.. decided to walk home.. took the e route i'd visualise to be.. Sigh.. ask and it shall be given.. next time.. but then.. was reminded of the little promise I'd made that will persist till end oct and this is certainly not right and ya, distraction... alright.. gotta be focus.. afterall, am in transition once again..
hehe, june is so sweet to arrange for a hot date with me after learning on my migration.. :) will certainly miss her lo.. must write her a love letter.. haha.. then damien will be jealous.. haha..
oh well.. closed that chapter in life.. at least there are things I can look forward in.. Slaying the Goliath once i found my sling and 5 stones..
Saturday, 12 July 2008
Lost 2.5 in a week! woo hoo!!
Realised that I was still unable to wake up in time to leave home by 630. Attempt failed again.. cuz cg ended close to 11 (cuz of the fellowship) and reached home ard 11:15 (wa.. by bus woah - luxury rite? never have the chance to reach home so fast after cg by means of the slowest form of public transportation - bus) Anyway, it was a long tiring day today cuz of the sudden workpile that arose. And was so brain-deaded by end of the day that i poured HOT water (thinking that it was ice-cold water that I'd filled my mug with from the dispenser) when i wanted to wash my kiwi fruit... AH.. Miraculously, i wasn't burnt.. and perhaps too i was too numb with the cold temperature .. (somehow i survived the whole day wearing just the thinthin m:phosis slip dress/top with the black leggings - cuz that was the first item grabbed and look alright to wear on friday - though it's definitely more party wear than office wear ) but PRAISE the LORD for protection. :)
Anyway, ya, was rather tired and almost wanted to skip the gym after leaving the office at ard 1930ish. but decided to alight when the train passed by raffles place.. :) proud of myself. Ran approx 5.5km in 44 min. (at a rather slow pace..) hehe and coincidentally bumped into e in the lift while leaving. haha.. if he has not realised on the way to the station that he left his lappie in the gym, would have a travel companion all the way home..
Decided to pull out the weighing scale hiding below the laundry basket.. yippie.. I lost 2.5 in just one week.. woo . surprise lo cuz didn't really do much, except for that pain-ful Sat session.. And only ran for abt half an hr on mon (ard 3km) and twirk a bit of my eating habits, having to log down everything consumed is rather stressful . haha shall tell him the good news tmw..
Yet, through this, felt the Holy Spirit was reminding me of what steven shared abt structuring our lives. Indeed, if we live a haphazard kind of life, we are subjecting ourselves to the attacks of the devil - we will be caught unaware. Yet, once a structure is in place, you will be alerted once something is amiss.. Organised chaos is just a term that lazy people coined up. Oh ya, i pride myself to be that.. Cleaning up my Organised-chaotic room tmw morning.
And it's really amazing that how God knows what we are thinking.. or the power of visualisation at work? Was really hoping to see ... and ya, my wish came thru.... Yet, it's no no no .. despite bring a smile to my face.. unless ...oh [well].. time to work my spiritual muscles.. :)
Anyway, ya, was rather tired and almost wanted to skip the gym after leaving the office at ard 1930ish. but decided to alight when the train passed by raffles place.. :) proud of myself. Ran approx 5.5km in 44 min. (at a rather slow pace..) hehe and coincidentally bumped into e in the lift while leaving. haha.. if he has not realised on the way to the station that he left his lappie in the gym, would have a travel companion all the way home..
Decided to pull out the weighing scale hiding below the laundry basket.. yippie.. I lost 2.5 in just one week.. woo . surprise lo cuz didn't really do much, except for that pain-ful Sat session.. And only ran for abt half an hr on mon (ard 3km) and twirk a bit of my eating habits, having to log down everything consumed is rather stressful . haha shall tell him the good news tmw..
Yet, through this, felt the Holy Spirit was reminding me of what steven shared abt structuring our lives. Indeed, if we live a haphazard kind of life, we are subjecting ourselves to the attacks of the devil - we will be caught unaware. Yet, once a structure is in place, you will be alerted once something is amiss.. Organised chaos is just a term that lazy people coined up. Oh ya, i pride myself to be that.. Cleaning up my Organised-chaotic room tmw morning.
And it's really amazing that how God knows what we are thinking.. or the power of visualisation at work? Was really hoping to see ... and ya, my wish came thru.... Yet, it's no no no .. despite bring a smile to my face.. unless ...oh [well].. time to work my spiritual muscles.. :)
Friday, 11 July 2008
the lost map.. [found]
Was at first apprehensive when i turned up at Tampines last evening.. Happy to see elim &; summer.. :) (familar faces.. ) turned out that i get the chance to direct them to jadyn's place.. :) Told elim that I'm likely to join them for good cuz I need to rehibilate .. (she was surprised, but she thought that I'm joking..)
For the first time in 2008, i can finally enjoy His presence during cg without having to think of how to scoot off asap after dismissal (which is very distracting and yes not right.) Hmmm, presence of God was so tangible when steven was sharing his testimony (though i'd heard him shared before, yet it's really the sweet tangible loving presence of God that oozed from him. Yup, one of the few I know that always carry God's tangible presence...the other is kel .. love talking to her) and can't help but my eyes went blurred even before worship started...
hmm since I've closed that long chapter, no point and can't (& don't want to) look back now. On hind sight, it should have happen earlier, perhaps, it won't create that much of a clutter as now. You gain some, you lose some. at least, I get the opportunity to know some better (like estelle.. ), the lost part.. oh well.. perhaps, it's seasonal... tired to pursue how this evolved but it is certainly not overnight thingy and i reckon it can be dated back to end 2007 whereby the shutting out was done by the other party. maybe the other party didn't realise it too.. power of [mis]communication. Too messy & bruised right now to sort it out..
It was an good & fresh start last evening. :) I found the map to get out of the wilderness.. :)
For the first time in 2008, i can finally enjoy His presence during cg without having to think of how to scoot off asap after dismissal (which is very distracting and yes not right.) Hmmm, presence of God was so tangible when steven was sharing his testimony (though i'd heard him shared before, yet it's really the sweet tangible loving presence of God that oozed from him. Yup, one of the few I know that always carry God's tangible presence...the other is kel .. love talking to her) and can't help but my eyes went blurred even before worship started...
hmm since I've closed that long chapter, no point and can't (& don't want to) look back now. On hind sight, it should have happen earlier, perhaps, it won't create that much of a clutter as now. You gain some, you lose some. at least, I get the opportunity to know some better (like estelle.. ), the lost part.. oh well.. perhaps, it's seasonal... tired to pursue how this evolved but it is certainly not overnight thingy and i reckon it can be dated back to end 2007 whereby the shutting out was done by the other party. maybe the other party didn't realise it too.. power of [mis]communication. Too messy & bruised right now to sort it out..
It was an good & fresh start last evening. :) I found the map to get out of the wilderness.. :)
Thursday, 10 July 2008
yummy 鱼片汤
oh well.. this was my lunch for the past two days.. And its yummy... Oh well, decided to have this for lunch for the next dunno how many days/months until i find something that is healthy and low in carb (cuz I've to log down what I'm consuming) when I'm at work.. Realised that i was actually eating loads of crap for the past few months despite not eating full meals.. okie, something to be rectified..
Anyway, this stall is tucked in the far away corner at Seah Imm Food Centre.. (side nearer to the bus terminal). The queue can get rather long (cuz some peeps打抱 like 4 to 5 packs at a time.. ) but it's delicious and woah.. many slices of fish! (and i love the cabbages in the soup) Oh well, since not eating the bee hoon/ rice.. paid another fifty cents for the vegs.. It's yummy.. and the soup is very flavorful and not too oily.. Think the name of the stall is called 一级棒XXXX *can't remember full name..
Anyway, this is definitely one of the 鱼汤that I enjoyed.. so ya, not really a chore la.. just that it'll be boring..
AM motivated by buttercup hulk's 1st attempt to head to the gym early this morning before work (HAHA was psycho-ing him to start the day by working out in gym -since it's so near his place..) hmm I should do likewise... :)
Liberated...
Nah, I did not get another dose of deliverance... but after that phonecall, suddenly felt lighter.. (recall the earlier msn conversation had with buttercup, the birthday boy yesterday - I shall call you the INCREDIBLE HULK soon hor? Afterall, you like the color green rite?- anyway, buttercup/hulk was sharing on the meaning of the word yoke.. God's yoke is light not that that equates to easy life but light cuz it would not break us! funny guy spelt the word as yolk - for a moment, i thought i spelt the word wrongly... LOL)
Oh well, I know that it was never your intention to hold me back, and ya, the silent rebellion and 包公脸 (which was very apparent to the buttercup hulk.. but haha maybe not the rest..but then maybe the rest also not observant la.. or i just look like them, so they think it's normal.. ) certainly frustrate and perhaps infuriate you. Would not be able to honor my word (whatever that I'd written to you) but ya, will be 乖to the next boss. Anyway, don't think you will get to read this but just wanna express my graditute towards you.. If I ever have the chance to share testimony on stage... haha i will sure mention your name!! :) (cuz you did the thing that really made me dislike you for a while.. but ya, it's for my own good ). Yup, thanks bro!
Afterwhich, sent a couple of sms to the two 'x': xl & xj. Had a good chat with corinth for an hour.. until ard 1a.m(haha she shared with me the adam's deliverance encounter.. hehehe.. ) so touched lo.. she still has the bs quiz a few hours later..
and wow.. attended the adult choir prac (cuz they need sops to help to sing for their performance for Trinity Bible College Graduation next mth).. envious of them having the priveillge to have sofian as their coach.. haha learnt a few techniques or two.. and ya.. he's my 偶像 lo.. but he's really passionate about teaching/ imparting his knowledge/ skills..
Oh well, I know that it was never your intention to hold me back, and ya, the silent rebellion and 包公脸 (which was very apparent to the buttercup hulk.. but haha maybe not the rest..but then maybe the rest also not observant la.. or i just look like them, so they think it's normal.. ) certainly frustrate and perhaps infuriate you. Would not be able to honor my word (whatever that I'd written to you) but ya, will be 乖to the next boss. Anyway, don't think you will get to read this but just wanna express my graditute towards you.. If I ever have the chance to share testimony on stage... haha i will sure mention your name!! :) (cuz you did the thing that really made me dislike you for a while.. but ya, it's for my own good ). Yup, thanks bro!
Afterwhich, sent a couple of sms to the two 'x': xl & xj. Had a good chat with corinth for an hour.. until ard 1a.m(haha she shared with me the adam's deliverance encounter.. hehehe.. ) so touched lo.. she still has the bs quiz a few hours later..
and wow.. attended the adult choir prac (cuz they need sops to help to sing for their performance for Trinity Bible College Graduation next mth).. envious of them having the priveillge to have sofian as their coach.. haha learnt a few techniques or two.. and ya.. he's my 偶像 lo.. but he's really passionate about teaching/ imparting his knowledge/ skills..
Wednesday, 9 July 2008
which vs which?
confrontation... vs sweeping under the carpet...
trashing things out... vs hiding things in the cupboard ...
which do you prefer??
Migration.. it's a hassle to chose to place of destination.. yet, why did one contemplate to leave where one was placed? To escape? To start anew? To accompany & support spouse at that destination (then no problem with destination.) Cuz the friends and family are over at that place (no prob with destination). Throw a few places at you.. are these random or grounds which you can pursue your destiny?? Or will one be better off if status quo?
trashing things out... vs hiding things in the cupboard ...
which do you prefer??
Migration.. it's a hassle to chose to place of destination.. yet, why did one contemplate to leave where one was placed? To escape? To start anew? To accompany & support spouse at that destination (then no problem with destination.) Cuz the friends and family are over at that place (no prob with destination). Throw a few places at you.. are these random or grounds which you can pursue your destiny?? Or will one be better off if status quo?
... ... ...
yet another ... ... post
Need a new sling and another 5 stones... OR
should destination be elsewhere?
And i need to get the other thot out of me.... sigh.. pray that it's just a passing thought cuz ya, it seemed to be going on & on... and going NO way.. definuitely not where HE wants me to head.. but... ha.. now i really know why some friends made certain decisions lo... but I don't want to be like them... 鱼与熊掌不可兼得
Need a new sling and another 5 stones... OR
should destination be elsewhere?
And i need to get the other thot out of me.... sigh.. pray that it's just a passing thought cuz ya, it seemed to be going on & on... and going NO way.. definuitely not where HE wants me to head.. but... ha.. now i really know why some friends made certain decisions lo... but I don't want to be like them... 鱼与熊掌不可兼得
Tuesday, 8 July 2008
yet another random post..
Ministry-service @ JW
hmmm JW's ministry time was longer than the expo's.. cuz word is shorter.. but happy to see people set free and woo.. young teenagers/ children giving their hearts to Jesus. Nah, still didn't manifest... I wonder if I'd suppress them from coming out or perhaps they were coughed out in faith.. :) (self-deliverance!) BUt i still don't want to face Goliath.. (have not mustered enough faith yet.. ) And somehow, felt like one of the 12 heading back to the place of "hotsprings" and nua-ing... cuz of ... Perhaps spiritual ears clogged up with earwax...
Piano recital @ victoria concert hall
Rushed down via cab to catch my dearest "oldest" friend's
piano recital on sunday. Woo.. was really blown away! Hmmm okie, has not watched her play except her practising her piano i think in our tns/dhs days.. :) think her parents were very surprised to see so many of us there (oh.. not really that many, but it was like a mini-reunion - a mixture of lower sec & upper sec classmates.. - oh sandi & i were classmates frm P6 to Sec 4!) Love the piece from Beethoven (Sonata No. 30 in E major, Op. 109) and her ecore piece (which i didn't manage to catch the name - cuz she was not miked-up). Didn't get to talk to sandi much.. should attempt to save up and perhaps fly solo to switzerland to visit her next year.. ~ ya, after i get my bonus next year perhaps..!) Had dinner with xiufang, yingwen, shuihui & yingying @ waruku at marina square.. okie, mini-fellowship-get-together-session.. Food was not bad (but I prefer italian pasta still.. :) .. Popped by topshop after dinner.. sigh, the pink snoopy tee is so cute but ya, my wardrobe is bursting to brim.. (literally spilling out) and ya, I need more formal clothing (but I seemed to have outgrown the shirts-phase...
The continuation of the ouchie
The muscle aches worsen on monday.. I would rather STAND then sit in the train cuz the act of sitting down and rising from the seat is an "OUCH" affair (same applies to climbing up/down stairs). But proud of myself that i still managed to hit the threadmill for half an hour, played on the efx for 10+ minutes.. Ohwell.. no $ to go expression/marie frances la.. (save that for the post-pregancy treatment .. lol..) But didn't manage to wake up early this morning to continue this.. happy to bump into e. didn't recognise me lo.. gotta wave my hellokitty at him to get his attention.. haha.. :)
Weird logic
Okay, if something is logical, it won't be weird.. but hey this is what the cab uncle decided to impart to me this morning when he realised that I wasn't married/attached/stillsingle/ despite being 20+. His take on relationship was that the number of bf/gf one has should be as many as possible (i.e. 'change bf/gf like you change clothes' - ????), cuz being bf/gf =X= committment (!!???!!). you should not limit your choice to just having one bf/gf cuz he/she may not be right for you, so you should have many bf/gf &; yep, to date ard and can do anything so long you don't get yourself pregnant (!!??!!!) . Even the young kids know that..
Oh well.. decided to keep comments to myself (cuz he has the perception that I'm old school -aiyo.. why dun have bf? or believe that being in relationship must have committment..) sensing that he's definitely been through bad things in relationship/ marriage perhaps cuz he sounded so jaded.. haha decerment spot on -cuz as I was abt to reach compass point, he said that this was just his take on relationship & marriage cuz he's been through all these.. And haha.. he thanked me for the great conversation we had..
It was a 75% monologue (didn't want to be debative early in the morning when my vocal chords not even warmed up) and weird that why cab uncles seemed to enjoy talking to me (even though my usual remarks are "ummm.... ah huh... yeah... really...oooo"). guess all they need is a listener
Thoughts i ought not to entertain
e, e, e, sigh!!
"e" just reminded me of wall-e. (wonder when it's coming.. ) think i would catch hancock too.. cuz it's a will smith show.. (oh well.. i think he's hot..
okie, back to work... distracted long enough..
hmmm JW's ministry time was longer than the expo's.. cuz word is shorter.. but happy to see people set free and woo.. young teenagers/ children giving their hearts to Jesus. Nah, still didn't manifest... I wonder if I'd suppress them from coming out or perhaps they were coughed out in faith.. :) (self-deliverance!) BUt i still don't want to face Goliath.. (have not mustered enough faith yet.. ) And somehow, felt like one of the 12 heading back to the place of "hotsprings" and nua-ing... cuz of ... Perhaps spiritual ears clogged up with earwax...
Piano recital @ victoria concert hall
Rushed down via cab to catch my dearest "oldest" friend's
piano recital on sunday. Woo.. was really blown away! Hmmm okie, has not watched her play except her practising her piano i think in our tns/dhs days.. :) think her parents were very surprised to see so many of us there (oh.. not really that many, but it was like a mini-reunion - a mixture of lower sec & upper sec classmates.. - oh sandi & i were classmates frm P6 to Sec 4!) Love the piece from Beethoven (Sonata No. 30 in E major, Op. 109) and her ecore piece (which i didn't manage to catch the name - cuz she was not miked-up). Didn't get to talk to sandi much.. should attempt to save up and perhaps fly solo to switzerland to visit her next year.. ~ ya, after i get my bonus next year perhaps..!) Had dinner with xiufang, yingwen, shuihui & yingying @ waruku at marina square.. okie, mini-fellowship-get-together-session.. Food was not bad (but I prefer italian pasta still.. :) .. Popped by topshop after dinner.. sigh, the pink snoopy tee is so cute but ya, my wardrobe is bursting to brim.. (literally spilling out) and ya, I need more formal clothing (but I seemed to have outgrown the shirts-phase...
The continuation of the ouchie
The muscle aches worsen on monday.. I would rather STAND then sit in the train cuz the act of sitting down and rising from the seat is an "OUCH" affair (same applies to climbing up/down stairs). But proud of myself that i still managed to hit the threadmill for half an hour, played on the efx for 10+ minutes.. Ohwell.. no $ to go expression/marie frances la.. (save that for the post-pregancy treatment .. lol..) But didn't manage to wake up early this morning to continue this.. happy to bump into e. didn't recognise me lo.. gotta wave my hellokitty at him to get his attention.. haha.. :)
Weird logic
Okay, if something is logical, it won't be weird.. but hey this is what the cab uncle decided to impart to me this morning when he realised that I wasn't married/attached/stillsingle/ despite being 20+. His take on relationship was that the number of bf/gf one has should be as many as possible (i.e. 'change bf/gf like you change clothes' - ????), cuz being bf/gf =X= committment (!!???!!). you should not limit your choice to just having one bf/gf cuz he/she may not be right for you, so you should have many bf/gf &; yep, to date ard and can do anything so long you don't get yourself pregnant (!!??!!!) . Even the young kids know that..
Oh well.. decided to keep comments to myself (cuz he has the perception that I'm old school -aiyo.. why dun have bf? or believe that being in relationship must have committment..) sensing that he's definitely been through bad things in relationship/ marriage perhaps cuz he sounded so jaded.. haha decerment spot on -cuz as I was abt to reach compass point, he said that this was just his take on relationship & marriage cuz he's been through all these.. And haha.. he thanked me for the great conversation we had..
It was a 75% monologue (didn't want to be debative early in the morning when my vocal chords not even warmed up) and weird that why cab uncles seemed to enjoy talking to me (even though my usual remarks are "ummm.... ah huh... yeah... really...oooo"). guess all they need is a listener
Thoughts i ought not to entertain
e, e, e, sigh!!
"e" just reminded me of wall-e. (wonder when it's coming.. ) think i would catch hancock too.. cuz it's a will smith show.. (oh well.. i think he's hot..
okie, back to work... distracted long enough..
Interesting mtr poster
This is one of the many interesting posters with rhyming catchphrase to educate users of the the mtr on the etiquette of using public transport..(though you'll have to read that in Cantonese..) Wa.. feel like flying there again.. national day weekend? nah.. not so soon.. maybe when the weather is cooler.. like dec.. :)
Perhaps the sbs transit, who operates the nel line, should create such ads to remind their users to not to rush in without letting the passengers in the train to alight. [that problem seems more prevalent at the NEL side, especially @ outram, though one can encounter the same situation when taking the other routes (the north-south & east-west)] Yet again, I wonder how effective it would be.. Despite of the visible signboards that remind the passengers to keep left to allow people who are in a hurry and not using the escalator as a "conveyor belt" to transform from one place to another, one will encounter numerous "roadblocks" while attempting to navigate through the straight path up/ down...
Googled on escalator etiquette. Seemed like I'm not the only one with this pet peeve!
- one - okie, for one reason or another, Singapore decided to get the stationary human beings to stand on the left, instead of the right..
- two - some guy who is confused by the escalator etiquette in different provinces in Japan..
- three ~ another peeved one!
and there are many others.. :)
Saturday, 5 July 2008
simple truth...
Muscle tissues that aren't worked out will become "nuah."
This is applicable to both natural and spiritual realm.
After a hiatus of 4 years, i resumed my pt. It was fun and ya.. tiring. My legs almost fumbled with the stairs after the workout. Oh well.. the strength that my muscles once possessed have "nua-lified". >.< he's really the 魔鬼教练 but seeing how strenous it was for me.. he relented a bitsy... *.* .. Except for being leaner and meaner (not really though, he's still funny and very chatty.. ) Happy to have tortured my flabby muscles.. (haha flattered to learn that i used to be one of the stronger gals that he'd trained.. and haha he challenged me to "regain" back that title.." LOL. Oh well, determined to lose that extra kilos of flab.. Felt kinda good after "torturing" the flabs.. Glad to be training under him again.. cuz no need to reestablish rapport and yup, comfortable with him lo. haha.. dun get me wrong la.. I'm not infatuated with him.. though perhaps he just lack the spiritual aspects of what I looked for.. :)
Was rather amazed that I could last the whole day until end of the service with just 2 apples and a cuppa and organic soya milk. Not that I'm doing it intentionally, but woke up late this morning cuz of the little "tantrum" the princess threw to her Daddy.. that left her totally drained out (which she learnt later in the service that she has somehow did that before it was preached to her.. ) and hence, only managed to grab two of her fave NZ rose apples out..
Haven't book seats for a long time.. missed the days of "seat booking ministry".. was reminded of the childlike motive for doing that.. Somehow, I found the serenity I missed while waiting for stelle & etc to arrive.. and the simple reason for doing what i was doing... I missed that feeling... And I really want it back.. but I don't know how to do it with the Goliath unslayed. To kill the Goliath or avoid it until the faith arise again??
WAs an awesome pnw today.. Sensed a breakthru' in the astmosphere during praise.. woo.. Sigh, was caught unaware by the camera guy who decided to zoom into me, hope I didn't look too shocked.. service message was on disappointment and how to handle that.. Deja vu. Was smiling thru the points cuz didn't even realised that I'd sub-consciously done all.. Perhaps that's why I didn't join the screaming contingent.. (But then again, so far, never had the drama-rama delieverance before... Don't think I want to go thru that unless there is and yup, those unwanted are definitely coming out, by hook or by crook...
But facing the Goliath is another issue altogether.. If God willing, I would prefer to do it in an easier environment.. Can I do it elsewhere?
This is applicable to both natural and spiritual realm.
After a hiatus of 4 years, i resumed my pt. It was fun and ya.. tiring. My legs almost fumbled with the stairs after the workout. Oh well.. the strength that my muscles once possessed have "nua-lified". >.< he's really the 魔鬼教练 but seeing how strenous it was for me.. he relented a bitsy... *.* .. Except for being leaner and meaner (not really though, he's still funny and very chatty.. ) Happy to have tortured my flabby muscles.. (haha flattered to learn that i used to be one of the stronger gals that he'd trained.. and haha he challenged me to "regain" back that title.." LOL. Oh well, determined to lose that extra kilos of flab.. Felt kinda good after "torturing" the flabs.. Glad to be training under him again.. cuz no need to reestablish rapport and yup, comfortable with him lo. haha.. dun get me wrong la.. I'm not infatuated with him.. though perhaps he just lack the spiritual aspects of what I looked for.. :)
Was rather amazed that I could last the whole day until end of the service with just 2 apples and a cuppa and organic soya milk. Not that I'm doing it intentionally, but woke up late this morning cuz of the little "tantrum" the princess threw to her Daddy.. that left her totally drained out (which she learnt later in the service that she has somehow did that before it was preached to her.. ) and hence, only managed to grab two of her fave NZ rose apples out..
Haven't book seats for a long time.. missed the days of "seat booking ministry".. was reminded of the childlike motive for doing that.. Somehow, I found the serenity I missed while waiting for stelle & etc to arrive.. and the simple reason for doing what i was doing... I missed that feeling... And I really want it back.. but I don't know how to do it with the Goliath unslayed. To kill the Goliath or avoid it until the faith arise again??
WAs an awesome pnw today.. Sensed a breakthru' in the astmosphere during praise.. woo.. Sigh, was caught unaware by the camera guy who decided to zoom into me, hope I didn't look too shocked.. service message was on disappointment and how to handle that.. Deja vu. Was smiling thru the points cuz didn't even realised that I'd sub-consciously done all.. Perhaps that's why I didn't join the screaming contingent.. (But then again, so far, never had the drama-rama delieverance before... Don't think I want to go thru that unless there is and yup, those unwanted are definitely coming out, by hook or by crook...
But facing the Goliath is another issue altogether.. If God willing, I would prefer to do it in an easier environment.. Can I do it elsewhere?
David & the Goliath
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.yep.. & trying hard to visualise that to materialise... in the sea of blue, green, brown & blond..
- Proverbs 13:12
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have been having sleepless nights. (my eyes are tired, my body too, but just couldn't get to sleep..) Last nite, was supposed to be waiting for a call, yet that never got through.. (not the first time anyway, perhaps it ain't important or the subject ain't important.. or... whatever).
Felt wronged. hey, it takes two hands to clap. You said you were hurt by words and actions. Have you place yourself in the other person's perspective to consider why when things happen, you aren't the first to be contacted/confided in? Oh yes, the little things add up.. well started with the diminishing of communication in the inital-still-alright-stage (but sometimes, you just don't reply.. that felt sorta shut from your life.. hey when things happen in ur life, u didn't come to me too) before THAT hit.. which proceed to minute incidents such as subtle distrust (imagine someone said something abt your buddy and yet you confirm the facts with not the buddy, but a third party.. and you learnt it from a third party... does it feel good?).. the lack of support when you sense that the buddy needs but did not voice out due to the inherent nature... ( cuz you thought that the best way out is to let the buddy cool off... Man, who in the right frame of mind will love reliving the pain over and over again... and telling everybody?) When care and concern is required, where are you? Sigh, my take- fight or flight. Since I don't wish to fight, I chose the latter.. you felt hurt and .. oh yeah, as if I'm gleeming with joy... oh well... I'm speechless... And perhaps, you think & feel you are the victim here... Alright, using a fave catchphrase of a friend "Say what what.." Oh well, thanks for making me the baddie here..
Say what what. Tired of the finger-pointing... though i never voiced this out to anyone.. (alright, unless to the invisible man reading this blog?) perhaps a complete cold turkey would be the BEST (i.e. me not ard) perhaps, the most logical direction is me dissipating..the Goliath seems to have grown and I'm just left with one stone and sling.. and lack the faith to pull that shot..
my simple prayer request.. please.. I just want to move on... new ground please?
Friday, 4 July 2008
tempted..
to change my skin... has already twirked the html so the images and background and even my little enhancement would be in place.. i.e was in operational ready mode.
glad i didn't switch cuz realised that someone has attempted to use the same skin for hers. Just that no twirking was done, hence the background didn't come up... Nah, don't want same association.. so, sticking to this current one..
glad i didn't switch cuz realised that someone has attempted to use the same skin for hers. Just that no twirking was done, hence the background didn't come up... Nah, don't want same association.. so, sticking to this current one..
Jaded
Why does it always have to be my err? Words that I've said? If I recall correctly, I didn't even utter a word at all... Words? I'm seriously tired of this and I wanna get on with life... Or I should not even have get you to come in the first place... Perhaps things won't be as bad as now..
Oh well, man doesn't see all aspects, God does. Say what you want and ya, the truth will prevail.
Oh well, man doesn't see all aspects, God does. Say what you want and ya, the truth will prevail.
Thursday, 3 July 2008
The one about the snowflakes
Yup, this one is dedicated to the snowflakes.. Yup. there is no winter in Singapore, yet it "snows". Like the Mavis fan song.. "雪一片一片一片一片". Sigh, I pray that the winter does not prevails.. or perhaps, I won't be there long enough to receive the flakes personally... but I heard a lot of snowflakes story last nite... Hope that the genuine passion within will melt away the flakes..
And yes, don't just assume that all that is logged here is all that there is.. The parables within are meant to be parables.. well.. just read from surface if you wish.. but the not so public stuff aren't found here...
And yes, don't just assume that all that is logged here is all that there is.. The parables within are meant to be parables.. well.. just read from surface if you wish.. but the not so public stuff aren't found here...
Tuesday, 1 July 2008
feeding... starving... building... trimming... and other random thots
What you will feed on will grow.. what you starve will eventually die…
Am I feeding on the right area/ starving the areas to be killed off? Or have i got the order wrong...
It is so easy to dispense advice to others.. it's much more difficult to apply them to yourself....Hence, these few verses in the bible that read :
Not being a hypo though, just found it immensely painful to do the "right thing". Analogy - to get the well-toned body- you need to put in effort to train the "slacking" muscles.. hence the phrase "no pain, no gain". Oh well, same applies for the spiritual muscles...On the note of muscles, i finally "succumbed" to the temptation of paying someone to motivate me to work out , to kill off the "muffin-trimmings".. oh well.. i should be more disciplined this time round.. and yup.. looking forward to this sat cuz will be training under my prv pt again - eric (okie, so far all my pt are chinese lo.. personal perference.. cuz bilingual.. and yah, easier to communicate..) he's so cute, send me a msg early this morning to welcome me back to the eric empire.. hahaha.. (okie, crap talk is good once in a while...) ya, i need someone to motivate me .. sigh.. still haven't get to stage that I can do things auto-pilot.. (which explains the mess that I'd got myself into.... ) happy though from the visit at gym last evening.. aj (the lady fit-pro who showed me ard and managed to get the commission lo cuz i signed a mini-package...) was shocked that I was a couple of years shy of 30.. she thought i was only 22! haha.. not bad right.. especially I was not made up lo..hehe..baby fats help to fight off wrinkles ba... or perhaps was the hallejulah cream that i get doused in daily... :)
July is a spend all month.. so many birthdays lo..... happy birthday eileen!!! one of my lovely choir helper.. then will be some cg members... (happily went shopping for bday gift during lunch earlier.. was so tempted to keep the gifts for myself.. ) yay going shOppin with ms stelle tmw.. for haha maybe her own gift as well...hehhee... then my mom..then my lovely neighbour sitting next to me... and some others as well.. woo..
not in the mood to put up pix taken during the hk trip yet... haha... at least this time round, I'm more tamed and didn't really splurge.. nah, the coaches and LVs did not lure me into the stores..despite of the 4 letter word plastered all over.. I still want my kate spade tote.. (maybe gotta wait till my next bonus...), too many ard carrying coaches and lvs... still I bought a lovely pair of boots from dkny which actually murdered my heels when i wore in back on the last day (to save luggage space, so i wore it instead).. but hehe it's so chio!
ooo... collected my tix from sistic earlier.. attempting to catch my bestpalie's performance at vch.. will fly down after service la.. aniwae, dun think will be going for ministry on sun svc cuz will attend sat svc.. (partly cuz of the reason that I'd told jieyin..).
shall attempt to categorise my pix tonite.. wa.. really like the pinky sony T70..pretty cool to nagivate using a stylus on the LCD touch screen... which i chose over the T2 (cuz the specifications are rather similar but T2 is bulkier and ya, more pricey..).. perhaps should get the iTouch? buttercup was giving me a mini-review on the iTouch he played with @ the epic store.. and ya, think my blogsite addy is still residing in one of the iTouch woah... but the capacity sorta put me off... if I can barely survive with a 30G how can i live with a smaller capacity iTouch.. Wait ba... and another touch screen gadget that make me go gaga.. phone! Max was showing me his new HTC Diamond.. i love the interface...but hehe too bad.. it's only in black... I like the first generation HTC Touch.. just that it's only 2G!.. oh well.. my lovely red w660i is still serving me well..still searching for the perfect red/pink phone... :)
Am I feeding on the right area/ starving the areas to be killed off? Or have i got the order wrong...
It is so easy to dispense advice to others.. it's much more difficult to apply them to yourself....Hence, these few verses in the bible that read :
"How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:4-5
Not being a hypo though, just found it immensely painful to do the "right thing". Analogy - to get the well-toned body- you need to put in effort to train the "slacking" muscles.. hence the phrase "no pain, no gain". Oh well, same applies for the spiritual muscles...On the note of muscles, i finally "succumbed" to the temptation of paying someone to motivate me to work out , to kill off the "muffin-trimmings".. oh well.. i should be more disciplined this time round.. and yup.. looking forward to this sat cuz will be training under my prv pt again - eric (okie, so far all my pt are chinese lo.. personal perference.. cuz bilingual.. and yah, easier to communicate..) he's so cute, send me a msg early this morning to welcome me back to the eric empire.. hahaha.. (okie, crap talk is good once in a while...) ya, i need someone to motivate me .. sigh.. still haven't get to stage that I can do things auto-pilot.. (which explains the mess that I'd got myself into.... ) happy though from the visit at gym last evening.. aj (the lady fit-pro who showed me ard and managed to get the commission lo cuz i signed a mini-package...) was shocked that I was a couple of years shy of 30.. she thought i was only 22! haha.. not bad right.. especially I was not made up lo..hehe..baby fats help to fight off wrinkles ba... or perhaps was the hallejulah cream that i get doused in daily... :)
July is a spend all month.. so many birthdays lo..... happy birthday eileen!!! one of my lovely choir helper.. then will be some cg members... (happily went shopping for bday gift during lunch earlier.. was so tempted to keep the gifts for myself.. ) yay going shOppin with ms stelle tmw.. for haha maybe her own gift as well...hehhee... then my mom..then my lovely neighbour sitting next to me... and some others as well.. woo..
not in the mood to put up pix taken during the hk trip yet... haha... at least this time round, I'm more tamed and didn't really splurge.. nah, the coaches and LVs did not lure me into the stores..despite of the 4 letter word plastered all over.. I still want my kate spade tote.. (maybe gotta wait till my next bonus...), too many ard carrying coaches and lvs... still I bought a lovely pair of boots from dkny which actually murdered my heels when i wore in back on the last day (to save luggage space, so i wore it instead).. but hehe it's so chio!
ooo... collected my tix from sistic earlier.. attempting to catch my bestpalie's performance at vch.. will fly down after service la.. aniwae, dun think will be going for ministry on sun svc cuz will attend sat svc.. (partly cuz of the reason that I'd told jieyin..).
shall attempt to categorise my pix tonite.. wa.. really like the pinky sony T70..pretty cool to nagivate using a stylus on the LCD touch screen... which i chose over the T2 (cuz the specifications are rather similar but T2 is bulkier and ya, more pricey..).. perhaps should get the iTouch? buttercup was giving me a mini-review on the iTouch he played with @ the epic store.. and ya, think my blogsite addy is still residing in one of the iTouch woah... but the capacity sorta put me off... if I can barely survive with a 30G how can i live with a smaller capacity iTouch.. Wait ba... and another touch screen gadget that make me go gaga.. phone! Max was showing me his new HTC Diamond.. i love the interface...but hehe too bad.. it's only in black... I like the first generation HTC Touch.. just that it's only 2G!.. oh well.. my lovely red w660i is still serving me well..still searching for the perfect red/pink phone... :)
smile..
nothing spectacular.. nothing really out of the blue...
just amazing how little things can brighten a gloomy day (the clouds were kinda dull this morning..)
first was the funny greeting sms from my longlost pt.. he's sure a funny guy... the second was the weird face that max made to himself while glancing at his own reflection in the glass door while waiting to alight at harbourfront.. (don't think he sees me though.. I'm at the connecting portion of the train ) haha.. that funny face bring a smile too... what a coincidence to be in the same train lo.. but usually if i bump into him (okie, won't be able to catch him cuz he moves tooo fast....like a ninja).. big indicator that I'm late for work...
and yep.. a phone call from my longest ever best palie last nite... sandi.. dun think i could make it for performance this sunday @ vch though (attempting to try to surprise her..) hehe.. hmm hope to catch up with her b4 she flies off to swiss again...
just amazing how little things can brighten a gloomy day (the clouds were kinda dull this morning..)
first was the funny greeting sms from my longlost pt.. he's sure a funny guy... the second was the weird face that max made to himself while glancing at his own reflection in the glass door while waiting to alight at harbourfront.. (don't think he sees me though.. I'm at the connecting portion of the train ) haha.. that funny face bring a smile too... what a coincidence to be in the same train lo.. but usually if i bump into him (okie, won't be able to catch him cuz he moves tooo fast....like a ninja).. big indicator that I'm late for work...
and yep.. a phone call from my longest ever best palie last nite... sandi.. dun think i could make it for performance this sunday @ vch though (attempting to try to surprise her..) hehe.. hmm hope to catch up with her b4 she flies off to swiss again...
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