my mini is going crazy cuz the battery can last a few hours and the top part falling apart... this this nano is for a good cause... US$10 will go to the global fund to fight aids in Africa .. see JoinRed
hmm....
Friday 29 December 2006
deliberating... which one?
hmmm spent the last hour deliberating whether to place the order for this....
12 hours..
had been working 12 hours for the past two days... hmmm well.. well.. it's stretching ..
certainly... leaving otd is not that easily achievable (unlike some.. )
guess it's human nature for man to love to compare... is it such a surprise that some are more busy than others? Or does it boost one's ego that one seemed to be perceived more laden with work than others.. comparing grapes and strawberries aren't exactly appropriate.. but grape would love to perceived grapes and strawberries are on par... (even though strawberries at times can't help to think of squeezing the juice out of the grapes... cuz grapes seems to have the idea that strawberries cannot survive without grapes...) Hello?? well well.. in parables again.. BUT strawberries would emerge victorious... (*wink*)
Just did the two "Thank You" cards for my leaders.. well. well.. the last ever ba... no time to indulge in this hobby of mine... while i was making them - just finished them an hour ago... was reminded not to be like "martha"...
it's 3:38am.. I need to seek Him.. tata... and yes.. i'm starting work in 5 hrs!
certainly... leaving otd is not that easily achievable (unlike some.. )
guess it's human nature for man to love to compare... is it such a surprise that some are more busy than others? Or does it boost one's ego that one seemed to be perceived more laden with work than others.. comparing grapes and strawberries aren't exactly appropriate.. but grape would love to perceived grapes and strawberries are on par... (even though strawberries at times can't help to think of squeezing the juice out of the grapes... cuz grapes seems to have the idea that strawberries cannot survive without grapes...) Hello?? well well.. in parables again.. BUT strawberries would emerge victorious... (*wink*)
Just did the two "Thank You" cards for my leaders.. well. well.. the last ever ba... no time to indulge in this hobby of mine... while i was making them - just finished them an hour ago... was reminded not to be like "martha"...
it's 3:38am.. I need to seek Him.. tata... and yes.. i'm starting work in 5 hrs!
Tuesday 26 December 2006
Charlotte's Web
hmmm read this book quite some time ago, caught the movie too... (should have teared buckets too... )
caught the movie version with joyce after the spending the carnival coupons (once again.. i played the vertical wheel thingy... which the feeling can be described as being in the aircon vent!).
despite knowing the storyline, it was a captivating movie.. well.. the animals diagloues can be hilarious at times (i like the scarecrow & crow part.. ahha; as well as the sheep responding in the "follower" mentality...), yet still revelations came while watching the movie... (well.. God moves in interesting ways.. He likes to speak to me via certain things that the character said and acted... ) and yes.. I teared a lot (if not for the "tap" that restrained the gushing "waterfalls") partly of the story and partly of what God was trying to tell me thru' the conversions between wilbur & charlotte..
certainly.. God is a not One that lies.. His words are YES and amen.. And like what charlotte promised wilbur that he would be the first spring piglet to see winter... and inspite of everything and herself, she selflessly places herelf on the tightrope to see thru her promise to wilbur.. Indeed, wilbur because of Charlotte's help and effort, he did won the governor's prize and yes.. escaped the fate of being cured ham... She literally laid down her life for him, cuz of the bond between them...
It's a great Christmas movie cuz in a way, what charlotte did, does in a way depicts what Jesus has done for us, the mankind.. laying down His life, sacrificing Himself for the wrongs not what He has done, but for what we have done...
And yes.. whatever dreams/ visions given... it will come to pass.. wait for the kairos time.. Just like how a spider catches its meal.. it spin the web .. and wait....
rating : 5 out of 5.. - biased opinion.. :)
p.s. Can't bear to eat ham.. pig fo next few weeks...
caught the movie version with joyce after the spending the carnival coupons (once again.. i played the vertical wheel thingy... which the feeling can be described as being in the aircon vent!).
despite knowing the storyline, it was a captivating movie.. well.. the animals diagloues can be hilarious at times (i like the scarecrow & crow part.. ahha; as well as the sheep responding in the "follower" mentality...), yet still revelations came while watching the movie... (well.. God moves in interesting ways.. He likes to speak to me via certain things that the character said and acted... ) and yes.. I teared a lot (if not for the "tap" that restrained the gushing "waterfalls") partly of the story and partly of what God was trying to tell me thru' the conversions between wilbur & charlotte..
certainly.. God is a not One that lies.. His words are YES and amen.. And like what charlotte promised wilbur that he would be the first spring piglet to see winter... and inspite of everything and herself, she selflessly places herelf on the tightrope to see thru her promise to wilbur.. Indeed, wilbur because of Charlotte's help and effort, he did won the governor's prize and yes.. escaped the fate of being cured ham... She literally laid down her life for him, cuz of the bond between them...
It's a great Christmas movie cuz in a way, what charlotte did, does in a way depicts what Jesus has done for us, the mankind.. laying down His life, sacrificing Himself for the wrongs not what He has done, but for what we have done...
And yes.. whatever dreams/ visions given... it will come to pass.. wait for the kairos time.. Just like how a spider catches its meal.. it spin the web .. and wait....
rating : 5 out of 5.. - biased opinion.. :)
p.s. Can't bear to eat ham.. pig fo next few weeks...
a good race
well.. matter of fact... it wasb't really a great day as i thought it should be.. cuz (a) I woke up late.. (b) i was sat with unresponsive pple ... (c) the person in front of me decided to be a BIG block to block my view .. but as the drama progressed... the mood gets better... ANd... what really brighten my day was the little tap on the back while i was walking back to my seat after the altar call.. the familar face of my dear cgl.. Ryan... :) really miss him... so glad that he's back for good (very sooon...).
felt bad... didn't have time to really get a christmas gifts for my cgls.. cuz too many things on hand... will make it good for thanksgiving...
hmmm.. really thank my dear members who made it happen for the fulfilling the goal of 40K! hmmm at least we make it high for christmas.. not really 1+1 but nearing there... Thanks my dear bro eUgene! You really make things happen!
hmmm it may not haven started well but at least it's gonna end good.. one more week... can't afford to lose steam... :)
felt bad... didn't have time to really get a christmas gifts for my cgls.. cuz too many things on hand... will make it good for thanksgiving...
hmmm.. really thank my dear members who made it happen for the fulfilling the goal of 40K! hmmm at least we make it high for christmas.. not really 1+1 but nearing there... Thanks my dear bro eUgene! You really make things happen!
hmmm it may not haven started well but at least it's gonna end good.. one more week... can't afford to lose steam... :)
Monday 25 December 2006
merry Christmas! the candlelight service...
The snapshot of the candelight service taken with my K610i, using the panaroma setting. hmmm a broadview of the hall...
The candle...
Time flies.. Just seemed that we've came expo not too long ago.. and we've been a year there! Hmmm very different feeling all together this year.. cuz last year... I was happily busy serving in the expo choir... (on duty every week...), this year round... well.. taken a step back and hmmm still served in a couple services, gotta pull out of the vivo caroling cuz of cg.. ( the irony is that i went to support two out of the 3 VIVO gigs... haha... well ... things happen for a reason.. If I'd been in the caroling gig, i would not be able to answer vic's call and... ya.. not sure how things will flow then... well well....)
Appreciation Nite for choir is mid Jan... well.. i hope it's not my last yet... hmm... though the chance is high...
It has been a loooong weekend... hard work.. bUt wOrth it...
Many thoughts and feelings ... let me sort and blog it when I'm more up to it... Yeah... the final lap for Sun!
Another thing to pOnder and pray.. the dateline is 28 Feb 07.. DO i have to go thru' it again? or... just wait?
Saturday 23 December 2006
a "happening" day!
- bought the brown and orange kitty cubes.. from MAc happy meal...(left the green one to complete my collection) - don't really fancy helly kitty but this is cute... :)
- received a phone call regarding a real-life crisis situation...
- breakthru' no. for my cg!
- handling the many facets of emotions.. anger, frustration, joy, panic, excitement ... all in a few hours...
- and my headache is onsetting again...
Christmas services happening this weekend @ EXPO hall 8.. call me if you wanna come.. there will be candlelight services :)
Friday 22 December 2006
trying to catch winks...up for 22 hrs
yups.. cuz haven't got time to warp present/ make& write cards.. cuz it's been a crazy period...
i need to zzzz a while before heading to wOrk.. cuz it's quarterly closing..
AND miracle can happen.. from 0 to 5 to 10 to 15!! thanks for those who are running with me... esp... my brother eugene... :)
Believing for MORE... :)
and i received an sms from missy down Under.. why must u always spring no surprise surprise return on me... miss ya gal.. FINALLY u are back!!
i need to zzzz a while before heading to wOrk.. cuz it's quarterly closing..
AND miracle can happen.. from 0 to 5 to 10 to 15!! thanks for those who are running with me... esp... my brother eugene... :)
Believing for MORE... :)
and i received an sms from missy down Under.. why must u always spring no surprise surprise return on me... miss ya gal.. FINALLY u are back!!
SKIN...ed
got my long awaited pay (okie, not that much..YET.. it will soon be...) and gave myself a lil pat on the back... haha..
worked till 8 (cuz clOsing bks), met vic, my x-colleague for dinner... popped to Marina Sq for a late shopping..saw this very sparkly crystals laid jeans @ skin BUT alas.. it was tooooo big for me.. actually most of the smaller sizes had ran out...cuz the sales had started for quite sometime.. (well.. i know but i didn't have the time for me to pop by when the 50% promo started... ) well. well... still i bought this more subtle pair.. design is rather toned down compared to those that caught my eye initially... (now how i wished...i was fatter... ??) but still its not bad... it was a steal @ 50% less... still more ex than my esprit ones... and tried on another coral dress top... it was great bUt too hawaiian.. so settled for another coral short sleeve tee... ahha...
won't be buying clothes till 2007.... keke
worked till 8 (cuz clOsing bks), met vic, my x-colleague for dinner... popped to Marina Sq for a late shopping..saw this very sparkly crystals laid jeans @ skin BUT alas.. it was tooooo big for me.. actually most of the smaller sizes had ran out...cuz the sales had started for quite sometime.. (well.. i know but i didn't have the time for me to pop by when the 50% promo started... ) well. well... still i bought this more subtle pair.. design is rather toned down compared to those that caught my eye initially... (now how i wished...i was fatter... ??) but still its not bad... it was a steal @ 50% less... still more ex than my esprit ones... and tried on another coral dress top... it was great bUt too hawaiian.. so settled for another coral short sleeve tee... ahha...
won't be buying clothes till 2007.... keke
Thursday 14 December 2006
attack in the invisible realm...
well...
let just say that it's battle after battle.. I've already taken the lowly step to ack. something which i wasn't aware of... well.. no response.. the blood is now not in my hand.. whether he like it or not.. I will continue to do per normal.. if he choose to abide in whatever he hear... God bless the source that is tainting the name... well.. doing things in the light.. else i won't be doing what ive been doing rite? hmmm.. well.. if he choose to hang on and cling and clive.. I've no choice either.. don't worry.. this will not stop me.. if he chooses to influence his sphere of influence to his mis-interpreted view of me.. well.. what goes around come around.. REST assured.. your words and actions HAVE ZERO impact on me.. so i've moved on since i tried to make peace despite your irresponsiveness.. cuz the world doesn't stop revolving b'cos you rejected the plea...
battle two.. the warfare in the east... ya.. once again.. it's full blast attack.. on many fronts.. i've tried my best to return home as early as i can.. CAN't I do what I want and need to do? p.o @ 27? ya... not to the knife extent.. but close to threats of need not return home... and ya.. do you think i'm partying out? nah... i wish... Latest offensive.. minutes ago.. (cuz reached mrt station @ 12. went to shopNsave for AL foil.. cuz 7-11 doesn't sell AND it was POURING when i reached pasir ris.. AND ya.. took a cab home when i'm two busstop away cUZ i was without brolly..)
challenge... 23 in 05.. became 21 in 06.. to reach 30 by 17 Dec.. I need a miracle... and really appreciate those who stood by... and thanks for those helping mr SA to try to pit my fall by being his coy... i hope u wake up soon.. revelation: repeated reminder from my cgl not to be affected by wat man thinks..
BIGGEST Challenge today (ok.. not the biggest... BIGGEST is the above...) churn out 200 perfect candles by daylight.. ya.. with help from.. princess & Holy Spirit.. Lord.. no DARK RINGS later pls!
let just say that it's battle after battle.. I've already taken the lowly step to ack. something which i wasn't aware of... well.. no response.. the blood is now not in my hand.. whether he like it or not.. I will continue to do per normal.. if he choose to abide in whatever he hear... God bless the source that is tainting the name... well.. doing things in the light.. else i won't be doing what ive been doing rite? hmmm.. well.. if he choose to hang on and cling and clive.. I've no choice either.. don't worry.. this will not stop me.. if he chooses to influence his sphere of influence to his mis-interpreted view of me.. well.. what goes around come around.. REST assured.. your words and actions HAVE ZERO impact on me.. so i've moved on since i tried to make peace despite your irresponsiveness.. cuz the world doesn't stop revolving b'cos you rejected the plea...
battle two.. the warfare in the east... ya.. once again.. it's full blast attack.. on many fronts.. i've tried my best to return home as early as i can.. CAN't I do what I want and need to do? p.o @ 27? ya... not to the knife extent.. but close to threats of need not return home... and ya.. do you think i'm partying out? nah... i wish... Latest offensive.. minutes ago.. (cuz reached mrt station @ 12. went to shopNsave for AL foil.. cuz 7-11 doesn't sell AND it was POURING when i reached pasir ris.. AND ya.. took a cab home when i'm two busstop away cUZ i was without brolly..)
challenge... 23 in 05.. became 21 in 06.. to reach 30 by 17 Dec.. I need a miracle... and really appreciate those who stood by... and thanks for those helping mr SA to try to pit my fall by being his coy... i hope u wake up soon.. revelation: repeated reminder from my cgl not to be affected by wat man thinks..
BIGGEST Challenge today (ok.. not the biggest... BIGGEST is the above...) churn out 200 perfect candles by daylight.. ya.. with help from.. princess & Holy Spirit.. Lord.. no DARK RINGS later pls!
Tuesday 12 December 2006
Monday 11 December 2006
catching up..
hmm met up with shu'en..
funny that despite not seeing each other for 11 years... and she can't really recognise me @ 1st glance.. guess i shed some unnecessary weight since... >.<
despite the gap in communication, we warmed up very fast and kept talking (and talking )from 730 to 1130... hmmmm... it was great time catching up.. and yes... naturally came to the "A" question.. nope.. not.. attached.. (funny that Michelle was asking me to help her advisor-to-be or perhaps now her advisor to get attached... ha.. )hmmm.. hmmm... well.. i guess this topic stops here.. tsk tsk...
hey v, you were in cityhall ard 7? saw a lady that resembles you wearing red top... is that you?
funny that despite not seeing each other for 11 years... and she can't really recognise me @ 1st glance.. guess i shed some unnecessary weight since... >.<
despite the gap in communication, we warmed up very fast and kept talking (and talking )from 730 to 1130... hmmmm... it was great time catching up.. and yes... naturally came to the "A" question.. nope.. not.. attached.. (funny that Michelle was asking me to help her advisor-to-be or perhaps now her advisor to get attached... ha.. )hmmm.. hmmm... well.. i guess this topic stops here.. tsk tsk...
hey v, you were in cityhall ard 7? saw a lady that resembles you wearing red top... is that you?
multi-tasking
Hmm.. it's a much easier task than my orginal "portfolio".. At least 50 % responded within 15 minutes (unlike the sheep i usually dealt with..) Well, i wonder why? All are sheeps.. but sheep of different nature... Ah.. not that challenging.. but ah.. more fulfilling...
Hmm buttercup, ya, I'm kinda "provoked" by certain martians.. cuz they are not protraying the characteristics of a Martian.. Well.. just irritated that why 'their "Yes" can't be a "yes"? Instead, they are like being tossed ard by wind! well.. E
Was chatting with cuiqi after the caroling pract @ SMU last nite.. hmm, i wished I've "kan po" le.. then i can do what it's fun to do... cuz less headaches, less heartaches.. But there's still a part of me ( a HUGE part) that still clings on.. Hmm am stopping the indulgence of pity parties... and ya... stop the subtle mini-protest...
It's time to focus.. have a draining talk with someone earlier.. am provoked that despite the info and impartation.. she still didn't get it! It's time to eliminate the "martha" nature!
Dislike the fact of in the known and yet info is still private.. ha..
Rain down...
all around the world we're singing...
Rain down...
my heart is dry but still i'm singing...
Eph 4:1 " I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called,"
Hmm buttercup, ya, I'm kinda "provoked" by certain martians.. cuz they are not protraying the characteristics of a Martian.. Well.. just irritated that why 'their "Yes" can't be a "yes"? Instead, they are like being tossed ard by wind! well.. E
Was chatting with cuiqi after the caroling pract @ SMU last nite.. hmm, i wished I've "kan po" le.. then i can do what it's fun to do... cuz less headaches, less heartaches.. But there's still a part of me ( a HUGE part) that still clings on.. Hmm am stopping the indulgence of pity parties... and ya... stop the subtle mini-protest...
It's time to focus.. have a draining talk with someone earlier.. am provoked that despite the info and impartation.. she still didn't get it! It's time to eliminate the "martha" nature!
Dislike the fact of in the known and yet info is still private.. ha..
Rain down...
all around the world we're singing...
Rain down...
my heart is dry but still i'm singing...
Eph 4:1 " I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called,"
Sunday 10 December 2006
big heart
indeed.. else how can one endure and focus and run the race.. thanks mr "italy". you might think that by saying "no", i might not be to detect but nope... i did... I'm not dense... really not
Saturday 9 December 2006
Thanksgiving..
Indeed.. December is a month of thanksgiving.. A festive month.. And Yes.. Each December seemed to get busier and busier... (yeah.. caroling @ vivocity. hippobus & chjimes.. ! =)
2006 is ONE of the MOST colorful year in my 20+ years of existence on this planet and on this ISland state called Singapore...
this is a year of utmost transitions... and ups and downs.. and ups and downs... and downs... and ups.. interesting encounters with the various speices of martians... the mcps ones...
yet... there are two mentors/leaders God has place directly over me that i truly truly am very greatful of, who guided me thru 2006 thru' the chastening.. the challenges posed... thanks alvin and steven! Esp Steven, whom i really appreciate your time and efforts in shaping this mule from within...I appreciate the personal time he sacrificed to impart to me.. the meals u blessed the cg with.. and thanks for having the faith in me despite of the numerous mistakes in this few months... who encouraged me when @ the pit and who spur me on again... thanks steven! It's my privilege to be able to help u in this half a year... thanks for the impartation.. the discipleship that many don't get to receive... felt bad that I didn't make it happen but.. you will be able to witness the revival in w110... amen!
And alvin... thanks for the faith u had in me.. for your encouragement in my worst pit...
2006 is ONE of the MOST colorful year in my 20+ years of existence on this planet and on this ISland state called Singapore...
this is a year of utmost transitions... and ups and downs.. and ups and downs... and downs... and ups.. interesting encounters with the various speices of martians... the mcps ones...
yet... there are two mentors/leaders God has place directly over me that i truly truly am very greatful of, who guided me thru 2006 thru' the chastening.. the challenges posed... thanks alvin and steven! Esp Steven, whom i really appreciate your time and efforts in shaping this mule from within...I appreciate the personal time he sacrificed to impart to me.. the meals u blessed the cg with.. and thanks for having the faith in me despite of the numerous mistakes in this few months... who encouraged me when @ the pit and who spur me on again... thanks steven! It's my privilege to be able to help u in this half a year... thanks for the impartation.. the discipleship that many don't get to receive... felt bad that I didn't make it happen but.. you will be able to witness the revival in w110... amen!
And alvin... thanks for the faith u had in me.. for your encouragement in my worst pit...
Restoration... MORe than what you can think or imagine of...
It's really by divine arrangement that I ended up attending thur's cg instead of Fri... hmmm.. frankly.. when I heard the arrangements that will about to take place.. I was nonchalant.. (hmm like the disbandment of n181.. nah, no history AIN't gonna repeat itself... ) Yet.. by 745pm.. reality sank in.. and I just felt" 舍不得"... yet I know if it ain't public info yet, it will remain private.... well.. yet.. God is good and HE is real.. YES.. you may not be able to see Him, but you can sense His Presence..
For the very first time.. I was totally & throughly touched by His love and presence right from praise to worship.. (thank God the mascara is Very waterproof.. !) well.. i can really sense the breakthru' upon my life towards the 2nd worship... by then...my tear duct had overworked.. I don't supposed I'd felt this way for a very long time...
my cgl prophesized over me... And truly...the words he spoke is a confirmation (upon confirmation) of what God has spoken to me.. these few days... but just didn't seemed to register in my mind.. I claimed the prophesys by faith.. I was reminded of what He has spoken to me @ the Anglican Retreat Centre approximately 4 years+ ago.. my first couple of zone meeting.. Indeed, His timing is the best timing... it's coming to pass.. if only i spring up and get back on my feet... Yes... what's been devoured by the locusts will be restored.. not one fold.. two folds.. but manifolds... And truly... He hears the desires of my heart.. And It will come to pass... if I don't lose heart and really seize this moment... And i will.
change is the only constant in life... Embrace change.. you might not understand it .. but just trust in the Creator God.. He who creates All things that came into existence... His way may be higher than our way.. you may not comprehend @ the present moment.. YEt.. revelation will come according to His best timing for us...
I love You.. my Heavenly Father.. :)
For the very first time.. I was totally & throughly touched by His love and presence right from praise to worship.. (thank God the mascara is Very waterproof.. !) well.. i can really sense the breakthru' upon my life towards the 2nd worship... by then...my tear duct had overworked.. I don't supposed I'd felt this way for a very long time...
my cgl prophesized over me... And truly...the words he spoke is a confirmation (upon confirmation) of what God has spoken to me.. these few days... but just didn't seemed to register in my mind.. I claimed the prophesys by faith.. I was reminded of what He has spoken to me @ the Anglican Retreat Centre approximately 4 years+ ago.. my first couple of zone meeting.. Indeed, His timing is the best timing... it's coming to pass.. if only i spring up and get back on my feet... Yes... what's been devoured by the locusts will be restored.. not one fold.. two folds.. but manifolds... And truly... He hears the desires of my heart.. And It will come to pass... if I don't lose heart and really seize this moment... And i will.
change is the only constant in life... Embrace change.. you might not understand it .. but just trust in the Creator God.. He who creates All things that came into existence... His way may be higher than our way.. you may not comprehend @ the present moment.. YEt.. revelation will come according to His best timing for us...
I love You.. my Heavenly Father.. :)
Wednesday 6 December 2006
Strength & Courage...
What's "strength"?
It is the ability to rebounce in the midst of failure when you fail. The speed at which one bounces back determine how strong one is...
What is "courage"?
Courage is not found in the absence of fear.. Courage is the boldness and willingness to confront your fear...
Courage is defined as the ability to step out into the unknown...
------------------------
Somethings just cannot slipped past certain people.. esp the anointed ones.. Or rather.. one maybe too transparent in certain aspects.. too transparent to yet another fellow earthing to note one's presence two days back, to the extent that that fellow earthing.. or rather MArtian... waved byeee to fellow MArtian.. and ignored the presence of earthing... (Earthing decided not hold it against the martian..)
enuff of space speech...
it's gonna be a BUSY week.. gee.. no time to meet up with shu'en.. sigh.. gotta squeeze time out... And.. ya.. in the silly attempt to show childish response to what's beyond my understanding.. I over-committed myself.... sigh.. yet.. I know it can be done... (i can anticipate greater long suffering - sigh.. cuiqi.. think only you know what I'm talkin abt.. Thanks for having happy meal with me just now... :))
over is over... look forward... move forward... can't turn.. cuz the back is not shielded.....
It is the ability to rebounce in the midst of failure when you fail. The speed at which one bounces back determine how strong one is...
What is "courage"?
Courage is not found in the absence of fear.. Courage is the boldness and willingness to confront your fear...
Courage is defined as the ability to step out into the unknown...
------------------------
Somethings just cannot slipped past certain people.. esp the anointed ones.. Or rather.. one maybe too transparent in certain aspects.. too transparent to yet another fellow earthing to note one's presence two days back, to the extent that that fellow earthing.. or rather MArtian... waved byeee to fellow MArtian.. and ignored the presence of earthing... (Earthing decided not hold it against the martian..)
enuff of space speech...
it's gonna be a BUSY week.. gee.. no time to meet up with shu'en.. sigh.. gotta squeeze time out... And.. ya.. in the silly attempt to show childish response to what's beyond my understanding.. I over-committed myself.... sigh.. yet.. I know it can be done... (i can anticipate greater long suffering - sigh.. cuiqi.. think only you know what I'm talkin abt.. Thanks for having happy meal with me just now... :))
over is over... look forward... move forward... can't turn.. cuz the back is not shielded.....
Monday 4 December 2006
headache.nauseous
yup.. that's how i'm feeling right now...
i guess today ain't exactly the best SUNday that princess has been thru...
yet.. she pressed on... cuz there's more to come...it's not time to thrOw tantrums.. not to throw in the towel...
i guess today ain't exactly the best SUNday that princess has been thru...
yet.. she pressed on... cuz there's more to come...it's not time to thrOw tantrums.. not to throw in the towel...
Friday 1 December 2006
CLouds and Rainbow
yup.. that's what i saw earlier... during cg...
a big white fluffy white cloud ... that's abt to sink & POUR over our lives... and from the rainbow.. I was reminded of how Abraham was reminded by God on the convenant HE has with him via this covenant....
physically tired... nation wise... we see how...
a big white fluffy white cloud ... that's abt to sink & POUR over our lives... and from the rainbow.. I was reminded of how Abraham was reminded by God on the convenant HE has with him via this covenant....
physically tired... nation wise... we see how...
the heavy G4
borrowed my bro's iBook cuz I don't have internet access @ work (cUz contract staff ~ well.. limited access to all things.. felt like 2nd class citizen @ times... ) and the notes were not uploaded last midnight when i checked, hence lugged the iBook to work.. lugged it to MacDonalds... cuz free wireless access ... Not complaining.. but I just do what I could to help..
checked my email.. and saw the new Vaio in dec issue of Sony emag... and they have it in different shades... Needless to say which is my fave.. obviously the PINK one!! (so me rite?)
Pretty rite? hmmm... very tempted..
checked my email.. and saw the new Vaio in dec issue of Sony emag... and they have it in different shades... Needless to say which is my fave.. obviously the PINK one!! (so me rite?)Pretty rite? hmmm... very tempted..
Sunday 26 November 2006
matured...
was reading the entries I wrote same day in 04, 05... glad to see that I have waned from the milk bottle...
Now.. burdened by something bigger.. more than what I've imagined...
i need to overcome this little-impossibilities.. too.. the marsians charsiew paus!
Now.. burdened by something bigger.. more than what I've imagined...
i need to overcome this little-impossibilities.. too.. the marsians charsiew paus!
change... Mars story part two
yes... anOther change.. at least i don't have to be caught in between... YET.. it's greater challenge for me...
well... what do i want? have i decided? the form has been dog-earred.. time to hand in the form.. signed...
Oh.. I realised people still think that I'm doing FA.. Ya.. doing financial accounting...
Oh.. and i think my flaming red hairstyle caught pple's attention.. haha.. it was MUCH brighter but i told jeanie, my stylist for 4 to 5 years.. to tone it down a bitsy... (not b'cos of the grooming thingy on wed.. actually 90% of what was shared.. I know and i do apply at times when i'm not too drained.. but haha.. i do things beyond.. the basic... ahah.. hence.. i loook yoooounger than my age!! haha... )
Oh... bad throat... almost lost my voice after service... think i gave my 101% on stage cuz ya.. haha... CCC band leh... and haha.. no more CD to sign le.. (maybe i should take the other disc to sign... ahaha... )
oh... time is 120am.. in abt 6.5 hrs.. need to report for choir... well.. cuz just now went lao pa sat for fellowship (ya.. like back to WORK.. cuz my building is just next door!) hmmm departed that makan place at ard 1130-ish.. ya.. I'm the sole person taking the mass rapid transit service.. well.. not that I'm being that distant.. but its more efficient for me to take the transit service directly.. then to thicken my skin to hitch a ride half way and continue the rest of the journey.. Well.. I thought that the initiative should come from the Marsians to invite the Venus-ian to sit in his spacecraft? Some martians are true blue Marsians... well. Venus-ian doesn't want the wrong idea to be conveyed across, so without invitation, she is unlikely to hop onto the spacecraft.. the public space shutter service is rather speedy too.. just that late at nite, Venus-ian has to be X-tra careful.. cuz mal-functioning evil-intention Marsian might lurk ard.. THank God I live in a safe neighbourhood...
speaking of this breed of Marsians just remind of ... char siew paos.. MarsiansCharsiewPaos.
hmmm can i have charsiew paos for breakfast later? princess venus would try to win the marsians breed of Charsiew Paos over!! Crapping in a crappy manner...
cuz its not i don't want.. but i don't want to impose on others... and isn't this out Of heart? I'm not being 斤斤计较... I just don't want to overimpOse..
got MORE things ON my mind... PRAY.. AND FOR A SPEEDY RECOVERY for my Inflammed THROAT!
well... what do i want? have i decided? the form has been dog-earred.. time to hand in the form.. signed...
Oh.. I realised people still think that I'm doing FA.. Ya.. doing financial accounting...
Oh.. and i think my flaming red hairstyle caught pple's attention.. haha.. it was MUCH brighter but i told jeanie, my stylist for 4 to 5 years.. to tone it down a bitsy... (not b'cos of the grooming thingy on wed.. actually 90% of what was shared.. I know and i do apply at times when i'm not too drained.. but haha.. i do things beyond.. the basic... ahah.. hence.. i loook yoooounger than my age!! haha... )
Oh... bad throat... almost lost my voice after service... think i gave my 101% on stage cuz ya.. haha... CCC band leh... and haha.. no more CD to sign le.. (maybe i should take the other disc to sign... ahaha... )
oh... time is 120am.. in abt 6.5 hrs.. need to report for choir... well.. cuz just now went lao pa sat for fellowship (ya.. like back to WORK.. cuz my building is just next door!) hmmm departed that makan place at ard 1130-ish.. ya.. I'm the sole person taking the mass rapid transit service.. well.. not that I'm being that distant.. but its more efficient for me to take the transit service directly.. then to thicken my skin to hitch a ride half way and continue the rest of the journey.. Well.. I thought that the initiative should come from the Marsians to invite the Venus-ian to sit in his spacecraft? Some martians are true blue Marsians... well. Venus-ian doesn't want the wrong idea to be conveyed across, so without invitation, she is unlikely to hop onto the spacecraft.. the public space shutter service is rather speedy too.. just that late at nite, Venus-ian has to be X-tra careful.. cuz mal-functioning evil-intention Marsian might lurk ard.. THank God I live in a safe neighbourhood...
speaking of this breed of Marsians just remind of ... char siew paos.. MarsiansCharsiewPaos.
hmmm can i have charsiew paos for breakfast later? princess venus would try to win the marsians breed of Charsiew Paos over!! Crapping in a crappy manner...
cuz its not i don't want.. but i don't want to impose on others... and isn't this out Of heart? I'm not being 斤斤计较... I just don't want to overimpOse..
got MORE things ON my mind... PRAY.. AND FOR A SPEEDY RECOVERY for my Inflammed THROAT!
Friday 24 November 2006
something to chew on....
God is not a man, so He does not lie.
He is not human, so He does not change his mind.
Has He ever spoken and failed to act?
Has He ever promised and not carried it through?
Numbers 23:19
with that... I'm off to yet another interview... :)
Thursday 23 November 2006
hmmm why?
I wonder why?
Yet I decided to give it a go..
Yet I wonder what will I do if the answer is good..
Somehow I feel I would be able to get it if i want.. cuz there's no vacanies posted online and i didn't specify the post that I want... still they called me up on Monday & yet again today... agreed for an interview on Fri... however, this evening, after the official hours, my boss came and told me what he's planned for me.. (casually, perhaps he could sense that I'm feeling bored and not fulfilled doing a temp's job... ) BUT is this what He wants me to do?
Well.. God is good.. Is this indicative that this not the end yet? cuz rejected one interview last week.. now there's another... should I take this up? I don't want to make a rush choice again.. fact that it's one of the big names in the industry made me think twice.. (come to think of it.. I'm very blessed.. always have the opptys at the big players.. By God's grace and favour!)
I need to relook the way i look at things... I'm appreciative of how alvin tried to encouage me thru' sharing his story (once again, i asked the question.. cuz i wasn't sure... Change.. get out of the warped mind.. am trying to unravell that...)
Stepped out of that.. So.. cleaned heart.. new mind... so yUp.. will head towards DBS tower this fri instead.. if God's gonna open that doorway for me.. I will take it.. :) [sorta wonder if i go for singtel's, will i get it? 50-50 chance.. ya.. don't want to shortchange myself.. so.. going for the interview WHICH they didn't even grant me when i applied while in 1st sem final year @ ntu...
well... to be updated...
the differnce behind the one word reply "NO" and the wordy sms that conveyed the same gist, yet differenth heart... well.. we shall see...
good news bad news... still must drink K? :)
Yet I decided to give it a go..
Yet I wonder what will I do if the answer is good..
Somehow I feel I would be able to get it if i want.. cuz there's no vacanies posted online and i didn't specify the post that I want... still they called me up on Monday & yet again today... agreed for an interview on Fri... however, this evening, after the official hours, my boss came and told me what he's planned for me.. (casually, perhaps he could sense that I'm feeling bored and not fulfilled doing a temp's job... ) BUT is this what He wants me to do?
Well.. God is good.. Is this indicative that this not the end yet? cuz rejected one interview last week.. now there's another... should I take this up? I don't want to make a rush choice again.. fact that it's one of the big names in the industry made me think twice.. (come to think of it.. I'm very blessed.. always have the opptys at the big players.. By God's grace and favour!)
I need to relook the way i look at things... I'm appreciative of how alvin tried to encouage me thru' sharing his story (once again, i asked the question.. cuz i wasn't sure... Change.. get out of the warped mind.. am trying to unravell that...)
Stepped out of that.. So.. cleaned heart.. new mind... so yUp.. will head towards DBS tower this fri instead.. if God's gonna open that doorway for me.. I will take it.. :) [sorta wonder if i go for singtel's, will i get it? 50-50 chance.. ya.. don't want to shortchange myself.. so.. going for the interview WHICH they didn't even grant me when i applied while in 1st sem final year @ ntu...
well... to be updated...
the differnce behind the one word reply "NO" and the wordy sms that conveyed the same gist, yet differenth heart... well.. we shall see...
good news bad news... still must drink K? :)
Wednesday 22 November 2006
Tuesday 21 November 2006
retro...
hmmm decided to re-use a skin which i loved....
hmm today nearly blanked out in the mrt on my way to work... hmmm lights seemed to have dimmed suddenly.. and yes.. accompanied by cold sweat.. and naseous.. hmm.. was praying that I will reach office without collasping halfway.. By His grace.. didn't passed out (the one and only time i almost blanked out was while crossing the road.. - cuz i think my blood sugar dipped low cuz was without food for at least half a day (and not during fasting... ) hmmm.. thank God for protection, else i won't know how I crossed the road while seeing stars in darkness for a few sec!--
Anyway... it was a good day.. (though i struggled to get up cuz felt so tired... ) and yay.. deloitte called me.. hmmm... :) am surprised cuz i just parked my resume @ their site for fun.. well... will see how...
meeting in the evening was good.. hmmm now i need to type the minutes.. let me rest 1st... will do it 1st thing i wake up (and connected to a mailbox...)
O.. yes.. CHange.. that's the word ringing in my ear since fri... (and the voice gets louder and louder from fri to SAT to SUN... )
hmm today nearly blanked out in the mrt on my way to work... hmmm lights seemed to have dimmed suddenly.. and yes.. accompanied by cold sweat.. and naseous.. hmm.. was praying that I will reach office without collasping halfway.. By His grace.. didn't passed out (the one and only time i almost blanked out was while crossing the road.. - cuz i think my blood sugar dipped low cuz was without food for at least half a day (and not during fasting... ) hmmm.. thank God for protection, else i won't know how I crossed the road while seeing stars in darkness for a few sec!--
Anyway... it was a good day.. (though i struggled to get up cuz felt so tired... ) and yay.. deloitte called me.. hmmm... :) am surprised cuz i just parked my resume @ their site for fun.. well... will see how...
meeting in the evening was good.. hmmm now i need to type the minutes.. let me rest 1st... will do it 1st thing i wake up (and connected to a mailbox...)
O.. yes.. CHange.. that's the word ringing in my ear since fri... (and the voice gets louder and louder from fri to SAT to SUN... )
It is insanity to expect a different result by doing things the same way...
Thursday 16 November 2006
retail therapy
What is it? well...
hmmm i gotta stop the treatments sooon.. else... can add shopaholic as my third name...
Retail therapy is shopping with the primary purpose of improving the buyer's mood or disposition. (1) Often seen in people during periods of depression or transition, it is normally a short-lived habit. Items purchased during periods of retail therapy are sometimes referred to as "comfort buys." -- source wikipedia
"Treatment 1" - Sunday Nov 12
Venue : stila counter @ metro paragon
perks: Stila freebies & limited edition goodies
mini- treat on wed nov 15
bought the "宫"soundtrack.. hmmm not a fanatic but like some of the songs.. :)
"Treatment 2" - Thursday Nov 16can't help but to "self-help" in this manner... went with the intention today to buy birthday pressie.. BUT apparent dosage from treatment 1 on sunday wasn't strong enuff (despite price is..) and hence... bodyshop galore! And i was pleasantly surprised that the saleslady @ the blackraisins' counter @ Isetan recognised me.. - and i really loved their clay-handmade earrings and accessories...
Venue : tampines mall : the bodyshop.perlini silver.blackraisins
pick-me-up: freebies from bodyshoP.. (didn't know i'll be entitled to the freebies.. and haha a bagful of them.. I love the perfum oil and the strawberry prdt package!!) .. 50% off the purchase at perlini cuz made use of my 50% birthday disc.
hmmm i gotta stop the treatments sooon.. else... can add shopaholic as my third name...
the "memorable" day..
well.. what happened 5 years ago on the faithful deepavali hols came to pass again exactly on tUes.. well.. is it TOOO much for me to expect the two words and a song from "family"? well.. thanks for making felt sooo loved... why did 2001 deepavali hol left such a great impression... cuz that was mione's 1st outing day with her new family members that bore the numerical pre-fix 79 and that day happened to be on the fourteenth day... well.. the deja vu feeling came in a replay mode on tues. well.. whom i expect to remember DIDN't (or perhaps not that significant to be registered...). who i did not expect to remember DID.
yet.. that day was a memorable day AND i get to see the REAL side of some ... well, i guess my decision to leave the previous org might not be a move agreeable to some.. YET.. you don't have to show your disapproval in such a direct manner rite? One of them moved pass me, gave me a look - (that look CAN kill), {which was after "the second thought" song - which I can understand u guys find it awkward to sing/ celebrate cuz no gift for me - but have to sing cuz it was the actual day? - well, i guess it make not much of a difference to me already since it doesn't matter already... } but appreciate some of the hugs and sincere wishes from some..
Is it too much to expect in return a tiny fraction of what I have sowed? Or perhaps what was done was in vain?
Well.. i learnt my lesson.. and re-adjust my expectation...
eugene.. that's why i said.. "i feel so loved today" when u & summer said bye on tues.
yet.. still appreciative of some... of the sms-es sent by friends..
huiling.. the 1st to sms me... in the middle of the night...
chris.. the pretty one... who sms me..
chris.. my cell member who surprised me with the book from Pastor Ulf..
clarinda.. who lunched with me.. and made me felt like it's my "bird day"!
wanling, jieyin, summer.. gald to serve with u guys during pm.. thanks for ya sms..
ted, long, eugene,susan,xiaojuan, vicky,lian,darren, kinonn - thanks for the sms.
alvin, thanks for the encouraging sms-es.. and for having faith in me still..
my Jc pal shumin n tien n violet.. violet.. enjoy ur tpe trip.. tien.. thanks 4 making me feel not so lost at work...
my ex-colleagues.. my sisters: devi, kam,novis,yenting,vic... and a special phone call from angela - I was caught by surprise that she remembered... :) -- friendster help in a way to remind too...
my manager for less than 1 month.. thanks for ya card.. shocked to receive it though.. :)
Ah.. Friendster.. good invention.. yay.. am able to reach shu'en cuz of this.. she's one of my close palie in lower sec .. :0 yeah.. meeting her next week...
hmm not so bad afterall...
yet.. that day was a memorable day AND i get to see the REAL side of some ... well, i guess my decision to leave the previous org might not be a move agreeable to some.. YET.. you don't have to show your disapproval in such a direct manner rite? One of them moved pass me, gave me a look - (that look CAN kill), {which was after "the second thought" song - which I can understand u guys find it awkward to sing/ celebrate cuz no gift for me - but have to sing cuz it was the actual day? - well, i guess it make not much of a difference to me already since it doesn't matter already... } but appreciate some of the hugs and sincere wishes from some..
Is it too much to expect in return a tiny fraction of what I have sowed? Or perhaps what was done was in vain?
Well.. i learnt my lesson.. and re-adjust my expectation...
eugene.. that's why i said.. "i feel so loved today" when u & summer said bye on tues.
yet.. still appreciative of some... of the sms-es sent by friends..
huiling.. the 1st to sms me... in the middle of the night...
chris.. the pretty one... who sms me..
chris.. my cell member who surprised me with the book from Pastor Ulf..
clarinda.. who lunched with me.. and made me felt like it's my "bird day"!
wanling, jieyin, summer.. gald to serve with u guys during pm.. thanks for ya sms..
ted, long, eugene,susan,xiaojuan, vicky,lian,darren, kinonn - thanks for the sms.
alvin, thanks for the encouraging sms-es.. and for having faith in me still..
my Jc pal shumin n tien n violet.. violet.. enjoy ur tpe trip.. tien.. thanks 4 making me feel not so lost at work...
my ex-colleagues.. my sisters: devi, kam,novis,yenting,vic... and a special phone call from angela - I was caught by surprise that she remembered... :) -- friendster help in a way to remind too...
my manager for less than 1 month.. thanks for ya card.. shocked to receive it though.. :)
Ah.. Friendster.. good invention.. yay.. am able to reach shu'en cuz of this.. she's one of my close palie in lower sec .. :0 yeah.. meeting her next week...
hmm not so bad afterall...
Tuesday 14 November 2006
claypot rice...
yummy.. the claypot was worth the wait.. well.. after my stocking up of my Stila products @ the Metro sale(well.. stock up is the suitable description cuz.. haha.. ask cherie. she would know what I mean... well.. I know it's building fund period... but 20% off the price (plus the gorgeous stila goodies... ) hmm.. and it's princess mione's once a year pamper... (hmm.. frequency of impulsive shopping has greatly reduced... Ah... saw this bohemian looking bag @ bugis street while i accompanied chris (nope.. not my cg's chris.. but the pretty chris.. >.<) to change her purchase at this store selling lotSA bags... Hey.. the bag is big.. (ok.. Not that huge.. BUt. spacious enuff to replace my dying Espirt bag - ANd I'm tempted to BUY an exact SAME one before it went out of season...) and so girly... so me.. haha.. BUT.. hmmm.. Spent too much on sunday... tsk tsk..
Whoops... digress from the claypot rice.. (haha.. can't help it.. this my very addictive passtime.. that i'm trying to stop boosting the economy... ) Hmm.. waited for approximately 30 min .. but this taste better than the one at geylang.. I'm not a big fan of staple food.. BUT I like the 锅巴.. yummy... also not too oily... (and no big pieces 咸鱼 .. am not a fan either..)
hmm wonder how I would spend nov 14 this year... one thing is for sure.. prayer meeting at nite... and yes.. I can forsee my honeymoon days fast approaching an end.. avp told me that he wanted me to take the grp books.. (!!! man. it's not the subsi.. but the main grp... !!!) so... meanwhile i should enjoy the honeymoon period while it last... hmmm well.. sky seemed to be shining brigher.. Tsk.. the Friday rd 1 interview... just received the invitation from singtel.. hmm... gotta rsvp by wed.. one more day to ponder... hmm.. so i shall go and ponder... and PRAY...
Sunday 12 November 2006
tired.. fatigue...
am i tired? yes..
yet.. i feel like i'm doing the redundant for things that don't even matter to some.. it's not important.. that can wait.. I would wish to wait to..
venting my frustration in the form of a parable.. ! yes... great attitude.. great indeed...
yet.. i feel like i'm doing the redundant for things that don't even matter to some.. it's not important.. that can wait.. I would wish to wait to..
what's is chicken rice without chicken? Do you order chicken rice and expect only rice and without the chicken when order have been placed for chicken and rice? Oh.. I guess in the span of placing order and delivering the order.. you have forgotten part of the dish... oh.. you are busy frying the vegetables..
forgotten to cook the chicken... ok.. I will wait then... Can i say no? well.. consequence of procrastinating when i asked you to chop the chicken first, but you say later rite?
hey.. can you at least give me some respect.. perhaps u view me as a small fry.. but i need the chicken with the rice ok?
venting my frustration in the form of a parable.. ! yes... great attitude.. great indeed...
Saturday 11 November 2006
Waiting
I thought i'll be late. Spent 14 to rush here to dhoby ghaut. Yet she's late. Shld take mrt instead and i'd b earlier than her still.
Growth is by product of yourself.
Friday 10 November 2006
good intentions
I appreciate the well-intentions of those who planned to surprise me today.. BUT frankly.. I would love to point out your error when i saw the candles being put in place.. I thought you will wait till he comes out BUT...
i feel loved? eh... not really... frankly.. the most sincere wishes and handshake came from the two charles.. ok.. I'm tired.. (was at the bull run earlier, helping out.. aND i hope i won't appear on papers tmw cuz one of the manangement made us (my colleagues and i) take pic with ritchie ren... and man.. there are like at least 5 to 6 camera flashes... infront of us... )
got an interview from Singtel..tax manager.. But don't think I will go for the interview..
I need to shower them more love, i think... have given so much away.. i hope Nov 14 (and yes.. that's my birthday!) will not be as pathetic as today...
i feel loved? eh... not really... frankly.. the most sincere wishes and handshake came from the two charles.. ok.. I'm tired.. (was at the bull run earlier, helping out.. aND i hope i won't appear on papers tmw cuz one of the manangement made us (my colleagues and i) take pic with ritchie ren... and man.. there are like at least 5 to 6 camera flashes... infront of us... )
got an interview from Singtel..tax manager.. But don't think I will go for the interview..
I need to shower them more love, i think... have given so much away.. i hope Nov 14 (and yes.. that's my birthday!) will not be as pathetic as today...
Bored
I've nothing to do. It's so boring.. T'is view from where i'm seating. Makeshift area as office space is scarce.. Whatever.
1st day...
well.. it was surely a honeymoon day for me.. my assignment for the day... Reading the Financial Statement for FY2006.. made new friend.. my next neighbour (another fresh "addition", 3 days older than me..), michelle, who is temp-ing for 3 months.. (ha.. harvest...) hmmm we shared common grd... Korean dramas.. ahha.. other than that.. colleagues so far helpful.. and friendly... yet.. the honeymoon period is just a beginning..
michelle and i were volunteered by boss to help out in the bull's run tmw.. (a very last minute rope-in.. i guessed he didn't want us to feel left out..) so.. went to cg tonite cuz not knowing what time it will end tmw..
Well.. will share testimony tmw if i have the chance.. anyway, cg was yet another encouraging session to me..
Frankly, am very encouraged by the friends that God has placed in my midst.. esp in this trying time.. and my dear r8ch.. thanks.. I recieved ur sms.. thanks dearie (and singnet internet svc!!) and my leaders alvin and steven...(I'll move towards the upward call of God.. ) .. my members kin onn and susan.. thanks 4 your concern.. (though unlikely you're reading this... )
hmmm cg just further confirmed and drive home to what Holy Spirit been speaking to me today.. that's all i gotta say...
michelle and i were volunteered by boss to help out in the bull's run tmw.. (a very last minute rope-in.. i guessed he didn't want us to feel left out..) so.. went to cg tonite cuz not knowing what time it will end tmw..
Well.. will share testimony tmw if i have the chance.. anyway, cg was yet another encouraging session to me..
Frankly, am very encouraged by the friends that God has placed in my midst.. esp in this trying time.. and my dear r8ch.. thanks.. I recieved ur sms.. thanks dearie (and singnet internet svc!!) and my leaders alvin and steven...(I'll move towards the upward call of God.. ) .. my members kin onn and susan.. thanks 4 your concern.. (though unlikely you're reading this... )
hmmm cg just further confirmed and drive home to what Holy Spirit been speaking to me today.. that's all i gotta say...
I don't want to ever lose my 1st love.. not like the Ephesus Church..my first love, forever You will be..
Rev 2: 4-5
Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your
first love. Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent.
Thursday 9 November 2006
a new day... a fresh start...
yup... it's a fresh start... for certain aspects of my life...
perhaps u will see less frequent postings... but that's what i can do for now... ;)
perhaps u will see less frequent postings... but that's what i can do for now... ;)
Wednesday 8 November 2006
no more "I know"
I already knew I didn't make it... I said it doesn't matter, actually it matters.. missed the timing.. doing the wrong things at the wrong time..
no blame shifting.. it's my own neglience.. complacency... hate the lethargic mode.. result of the repetitive "I know..." with no further output..
hence.. face the consequence...
i press on...
everything in His time...
no blame shifting.. it's my own neglience.. complacency... hate the lethargic mode.. result of the repetitive "I know..." with no further output..
hence.. face the consequence...
i press on...
everything in His time...
当最后一天的无业良民
well.. counting down... my last day of "nuahing"..
What have i done so far? Collected my second last stuff from iras (yep.. I accumulated A LOT of stuff in my five years there..)
wanted to go to the gym but I overslept.. considering maybe fri? Or before work tmw? hmmm...
heading out soon.. November is a month full of birthdays.. (mine included... )yippie!! hmmm yesterday received financial blessings from mom (cuz she strike 4d.. well. I'm against gambling.. but... I'm not against the money.. keke...) gotta source for birthday pressies.. (at least 3!)
hmm... oh yeah... gotta make the closure phone call. I don't think i can meet her on fri.. cuz working..
I ought not to feel critical.. BUT one thing I know why I didn't make it in the last month.. I'm not convicted... And I treasure genuine customer service than being serviced in a mass basis.. Small client still client rite? haha..
last nite my brother was complaining of how his friend (who is on her way to the MDRT this year) convinced him of terminating his life plan and got hers instead and to make him pay 3 mths premium upfront.. (not taking into consideration of fact that he has a medical condition and cancelling and taking a new policy would no doubt invite loading.. and higher premium..) well.. now I know how she got her mdrt.. And this is how pple became prejudiced against this industry..
I don't advocate this act and i know i won't do this.. .. I know the importance of educating of this... Yet.. I perfer to remain a customer at this pt in time.. cuz this is not the season... =)
What have i done so far? Collected my second last stuff from iras (yep.. I accumulated A LOT of stuff in my five years there..)
wanted to go to the gym but I overslept.. considering maybe fri? Or before work tmw? hmmm...
heading out soon.. November is a month full of birthdays.. (mine included... )yippie!! hmmm yesterday received financial blessings from mom (cuz she strike 4d.. well. I'm against gambling.. but... I'm not against the money.. keke...) gotta source for birthday pressies.. (at least 3!)
hmm... oh yeah... gotta make the closure phone call. I don't think i can meet her on fri.. cuz working..
I ought not to feel critical.. BUT one thing I know why I didn't make it in the last month.. I'm not convicted... And I treasure genuine customer service than being serviced in a mass basis.. Small client still client rite? haha..
last nite my brother was complaining of how his friend (who is on her way to the MDRT this year) convinced him of terminating his life plan and got hers instead and to make him pay 3 mths premium upfront.. (not taking into consideration of fact that he has a medical condition and cancelling and taking a new policy would no doubt invite loading.. and higher premium..) well.. now I know how she got her mdrt.. And this is how pple became prejudiced against this industry..
I don't advocate this act and i know i won't do this.. .. I know the importance of educating of this... Yet.. I perfer to remain a customer at this pt in time.. cuz this is not the season... =)
new skin.. new music...
changed the blogskin cuz it's a FRESH start.. music is changed too.. like this song... don't have the korean version.. but anyway i won't understand... found fanfan's cd at my brother's HUGE collection of CDs.. well.. it just showed that I've watching tooo much dvds... hmm bad for my eyerings... and shall not inject that into my very imaginative grey matter cells...
Tuesday 7 November 2006
Interview Round 3 - Human Resource
went for my 3rd round of interview @ sgx this morning... due to my unique name.. or perhaps being there for two interviews on fri, the receptionist recognised me!
well.. the HR personnel drilled more details than the avp i met last Friday.. well.. the interview lasted for half an hour... (the total time I spent with the other two vps..)... hmm still, left the interview room feeling that they would extend the offer to me.. Yup.. due to the lack of experience.. it will be contractual.. yet, it's an opportunity to learn.. at least biz/ corporate exposure..
went to cali after the interview (cuz meeting dar@ 12, interview ended ard 1035..)... missed "torturing" my muscles.. decided to make it regular.. afterall i've paid for the membership le.. haha. .. afterall now I'll be working at raffles place.. no excuse that it's out of the way... =) hmmm now.. motivated to go again tmw, cuz only got time for cardio today...
ha.. well.. went home after meeting dar for lunch @ amoy mkt... mom's at home.. and yes.. finally she vented her frustration at me for hanging ard at home.. (actually it's less than two weeks.. only..) and.. grumbled.. yup.. and just as I was to leave home.. I got a call.. Yippie.. They decided to offer me the job! Actually the avp has intention for me to start asap (i.e. tomorrow..) but HR decided to let me decide the start date.. so i told her.. Thurs.. hmm don't exactly know the contract terms yet.. but slight pay increment despite my less than adequate work experience..
According to Tien (who is also there, bt nope, not thru' her referral), I must have broken the records to finalise employment there... it's really short time frame.. I sent my resume on 28th Oct.. called up for interview on 31 Oct.. Ist & 2nd interview on 3rd Nov, 3rd interview on 7th Nov.. Starting work on 9th! Hmmm speedy yah? Really give thanks to God for favour with man... well.. really without Him, it will not be possible.. cuz I am new to FA (unless my one year stint as hon. treasurer counts.. ) If i'd accepted the peoplesearch thingy.. no doubt the pay is higher but.. it's only two months.. and conversion may not be certain but the pay will be fresh grad's .. sO.. yeah.. (=
on the other hand.. I can expect my learning curve to BE SHARP.. else they won't have the ugency to get me on board so soon.. well.. I can sure acheive it..
hmmm God is good.. now I can arise and build.. His house then my house..
well.. the HR personnel drilled more details than the avp i met last Friday.. well.. the interview lasted for half an hour... (the total time I spent with the other two vps..)... hmm still, left the interview room feeling that they would extend the offer to me.. Yup.. due to the lack of experience.. it will be contractual.. yet, it's an opportunity to learn.. at least biz/ corporate exposure..
went to cali after the interview (cuz meeting dar@ 12, interview ended ard 1035..)... missed "torturing" my muscles.. decided to make it regular.. afterall i've paid for the membership le.. haha. .. afterall now I'll be working at raffles place.. no excuse that it's out of the way... =) hmmm now.. motivated to go again tmw, cuz only got time for cardio today...
ha.. well.. went home after meeting dar for lunch @ amoy mkt... mom's at home.. and yes.. finally she vented her frustration at me for hanging ard at home.. (actually it's less than two weeks.. only..) and.. grumbled.. yup.. and just as I was to leave home.. I got a call.. Yippie.. They decided to offer me the job! Actually the avp has intention for me to start asap (i.e. tomorrow..) but HR decided to let me decide the start date.. so i told her.. Thurs.. hmm don't exactly know the contract terms yet.. but slight pay increment despite my less than adequate work experience..
According to Tien (who is also there, bt nope, not thru' her referral), I must have broken the records to finalise employment there... it's really short time frame.. I sent my resume on 28th Oct.. called up for interview on 31 Oct.. Ist & 2nd interview on 3rd Nov, 3rd interview on 7th Nov.. Starting work on 9th! Hmmm speedy yah? Really give thanks to God for favour with man... well.. really without Him, it will not be possible.. cuz I am new to FA (unless my one year stint as hon. treasurer counts.. ) If i'd accepted the peoplesearch thingy.. no doubt the pay is higher but.. it's only two months.. and conversion may not be certain but the pay will be fresh grad's .. sO.. yeah.. (=
on the other hand.. I can expect my learning curve to BE SHARP.. else they won't have the ugency to get me on board so soon.. well.. I can sure acheive it..
hmmm God is good.. now I can arise and build.. His house then my house..
today... and a year ago...
Was browsing thru' my pictures on my pc.. (I was searching for the pix that jieyin has been asking for a long time..) Found a pix that was taken exactly a year ago.. So.. thought why don't i take a picture and compare the difference.. [left portion taken in 2005, right portion taken today... ] Verdict.. ahha.. I look younger today right? =) [note.. not enhanced with by photoshop..] btw tried to cUrl my hair with the curler.. but didn't really last for long.. but kinda like the look (contrast to my belief, it didn't make me look older.. haha..) I must have watched too much dvd.. cuz I was feeding my grey matter with "宫".. and was inspired by the 太子妃's hairdo.. ya.. cUte..
hmm rachel dear.. I haven't nailed the job yet.. but it's almost closed.. watch this space for update.. =) speaking of which.. i need to zzz early cuz got the 3rd rd of interview tmw! His words will not return to Him void! Have been claiming by faith that I will be working there.. since shumin wedding dinner on Sat..
speaking of which.. the wedding dinner was like a reunion of s23 for me.. I realised I haven't seen them for 9 years! And.. it's great catching up *and everyone (except me) are either married OR rom-ed.. tsk tsk.. *soon soon, i wished.. * hmmm realised bonds built during JC years still strong.. haha. despite not seeing yinliang and david for close to a decade.. 但并不觉得生疏。。miss my hwa chong years.. hmm well.. at least I got in touch with them and yeah... reaching out time.. (all doing WELL in the different sectors of the marketplace..)
1st pressie
hmmm... this is such a girly watch.. A birthday pressie from my "sister-clan" @ iras.. it's a pre-birthday celebration.. (still counting down to my birthday .. heeehee...)
well.. timely gift CUZ I need another watch.. the face of my fossil charm bracelet watch is kinda scratched...
well.. timely gift CUZ I need another watch.. the face of my fossil charm bracelet watch is kinda scratched...
Sunday 5 November 2006
silly..me..
I ought to be sleeping.. haiz.. can't resist the temptation of the dvd set i bought to cheer myself last fri.. was watching gong.. haha.. ya.. now I've turned fanatic over 韩偶像剧..okie.. not all.. but.. tsk tsk tsk..
time to sleep since I've satisfied my flesh.. :)
time to sleep since I've satisfied my flesh.. :)
one of a kind..
my eyes are tired.. hurting.. stinging... YET I refused to sleep.. I think there's sOmething amiss?
precious... I've given my precious.. tears................. cuz blessed by the blessing.. cuz of my Creator..
And I have plans to take Hermione's Creation into reality.. I think I should book my name @ ACRA first.. =)
precious... I've given my precious.. tears................. cuz blessed by the blessing.. cuz of my Creator..
And I have plans to take Hermione's Creation into reality.. I think I should book my name @ ACRA first.. =)
Saturday 4 November 2006
2 rounds of interview within a day
Yep.. God is good.. Praise the Lord for the favour with man... Well, I was amazed by the speed of the interviews.. both round one and two.. AND yep.. I got the job.. (verbally) after speaking with the AVP in the morning.. and another big shot (he didn't gave me his name card so I dunno his position) in the afternoon.. ANd next tues.. I'm on my way to meet the HR with regards to renumeration...
well well.. what can i say.. Praise the Lord..
Yet.. princess is still princess with her unique array of thoughts.. she frown.. cuz.. the fruit is non-responsive...
princess... man does not live by FRUIT alone ... ("....but I'm princess that need a wee bit of encouragement... ")
well well.. what can i say.. Praise the Lord..
*******
Yet.. princess is still princess with her unique array of thoughts.. she frown.. cuz.. the fruit is non-responsive...
princess... man does not live by FRUIT alone ... ("....but I'm princess that need a wee bit of encouragement... ")
pieces... picking up the pieces...
the new vase...
freshly out of the gift box...
In a flash.. it was shattered into pieces...
Such a masterpiece...
such a pity that it was mishandled and ended up on the floor
in a million pieces..
can the pieces joined themselves back?
No.. but they wanted to..
yet.. they can only rely on the Creator
to put them back.. piece by piece...
The bystanders just point.. and lament..
yet.. not lifting a finger...
is it the fault of the vase to fell to the ground.
or it is the fault of the person who let the vase fell to the ground?
yet.. does it remedy the situation by pursuing the matter?
OR rather.. piece the shattered parts and do pursue the cause to prevent recurrence..
question... What about the vase? How does it feel?
yes.. the shattered bits can be pieced back.. BUT the fact remained that it will be viewed as one with flaws SO visible.. It will never be what it used to be.. YEt.. in the eye of the Creator.. It will always remained His masterpiece.. In spite of the cracks.. He can cover it with another layer of glaze.. that will fill the gap and cover the flaws.. Others might see it as CRACKS.. yet.. to the vase.. the cracks signify the love of the Creator as He doesn't mind the inperfection and give up. Instead.. He gave the vase a new lease of life...
freshly out of the gift box...
In a flash.. it was shattered into pieces...
Such a masterpiece...
such a pity that it was mishandled and ended up on the floor
in a million pieces..
can the pieces joined themselves back?
No.. but they wanted to..
yet.. they can only rely on the Creator
to put them back.. piece by piece...
The bystanders just point.. and lament..
yet.. not lifting a finger...
is it the fault of the vase to fell to the ground.
or it is the fault of the person who let the vase fell to the ground?
yet.. does it remedy the situation by pursuing the matter?
OR rather.. piece the shattered parts and do pursue the cause to prevent recurrence..
question... What about the vase? How does it feel?
yes.. the shattered bits can be pieced back.. BUT the fact remained that it will be viewed as one with flaws SO visible.. It will never be what it used to be.. YEt.. in the eye of the Creator.. It will always remained His masterpiece.. In spite of the cracks.. He can cover it with another layer of glaze.. that will fill the gap and cover the flaws.. Others might see it as CRACKS.. yet.. to the vase.. the cracks signify the love of the Creator as He doesn't mind the inperfection and give up. Instead.. He gave the vase a new lease of life...
Friday 3 November 2006
Back for 2 hours... 2nd rd at 1430
God is good.. really thank God for the favour with man.. Cuz.. been to 4 interviews so far... So far soo good.. well.. Am going to round 2 of interview this afternoon (rd one was this morning... efficient rite?? ).. Pray for me if u see this in time...
Now I know the benefits to be from recognised schools.. :) cUz.. IQ can really make up for the inxperience.. cuz.. thank God for placing me in these "stress abound.. academically recognised schools.." in my years of education... ya, I know my grey matter is working well.. BUT I will not be complacent or proud.. I lean on Him forever.. AND since I've decided.. I move on... I've the faith that this is the right decision.
The path of the righteous will shine ever brighter.. :)
Now I know the benefits to be from recognised schools.. :) cUz.. IQ can really make up for the inxperience.. cuz.. thank God for placing me in these "stress abound.. academically recognised schools.." in my years of education... ya, I know my grey matter is working well.. BUT I will not be complacent or proud.. I lean on Him forever.. AND since I've decided.. I move on... I've the faith that this is the right decision.
The path of the righteous will shine ever brighter.. :)
Thursday 2 November 2006
happy birthday... dear rachel...
my dearest girlie palie is celebrating her birthday today... Miss ya gal... hope to see ya in Dec! :)
stubborn?
obstinate? am i?
I think there is some bad infection going on in my eyes.. I've ample sleep and yet.. the eyes still stingy. the haze has sorta gone but WHY are my eyes still stingy?
Am i like a mule?
will i end up not eating the good of the land?
I think there is some bad infection going on in my eyes.. I've ample sleep and yet.. the eyes still stingy. the haze has sorta gone but WHY are my eyes still stingy?
Am i like a mule?
will i end up not eating the good of the land?
Wednesday 1 November 2006
woken from slumber..
thought that the call was from my cgl..(was supposed to wait for his meeting to end but I was feeling nauseous.. hence headed home first.. asn fell asleep after two panadols..) BUT it turned out to be an overseas call.. My dearest friend who called me in midst of her revision... thanks dear for calling... and really.. thanks for listening... and.. ya.. it's good to cook porridge with you.. wa.. 2 hours.. lol..
well.. really blessed with supportive friends.. in not so good times... very appreciative of rachel.. ivory... thanks dearie for caring.. and yup.. eugene.. thanks ! Jia you for your exams (rachel) and assignments (eugene)..
feeling much better now.. after the 2 hours sleep and.. chatting.. pouring.. with my palie.. and some milo and crackers.. (didn't have dinner...)
As for the question/challenge that pastor posted during the helpers meeting... YA.. it's for the person who kept saying "i know.." it is no longer I know.. and I'm doing it..
tomorrow is yet another challenge.. I wonder which will call.. seriously.. I would want to go for the sgx on fri.. yet.. i wonder if the bank called me.. what my decision would be? -- and ya.. still waiting for the biggie 4 to call.. or rather (just 2)...
I just feel that my birthday present -- the biggest this year -- would come before nov 14.. :)
well.. really blessed with supportive friends.. in not so good times... very appreciative of rachel.. ivory... thanks dearie for caring.. and yup.. eugene.. thanks ! Jia you for your exams (rachel) and assignments (eugene)..
feeling much better now.. after the 2 hours sleep and.. chatting.. pouring.. with my palie.. and some milo and crackers.. (didn't have dinner...)
As for the question/challenge that pastor posted during the helpers meeting... YA.. it's for the person who kept saying "i know.." it is no longer I know.. and I'm doing it..
tomorrow is yet another challenge.. I wonder which will call.. seriously.. I would want to go for the sgx on fri.. yet.. i wonder if the bank called me.. what my decision would be? -- and ya.. still waiting for the biggie 4 to call.. or rather (just 2)...
I just feel that my birthday present -- the biggest this year -- would come before nov 14.. :)
Tuesday 31 October 2006
another offer...
was rather surprised to receive the invitation to this interview.. well.. Doors are certainly opening.. (as contrary to what some told me last week.. well.. that's in the past.. put it behind me...) Funny that when i saw this building next to LAu pat sat last sat.. I have a feeling that I will be back again... well well.. :) so it did came to pass.. =)
still waiting.. yay! =)
still waiting.. yay! =)
transition...
I don't like the feeling... I don't like it..
DUST.. I hate dust... Now.. my left eye is swollen...
I don't like to not be in the known..
YEt.. i know this is what God wants me to develop.. THE gift of long suffering... A&B is round the corner.. YET I'm still in transition...
I know He is my Provider.. ANd Thanks for closing the door (the one i went yesterday.. She impressed with me.. bUt.. felt that it's not the ONE...)
Now.... the word "sen -sei" rings in my head.. but I shall not be distracted.. That's something i want to do.. but not now..
It's only the second week.. waiting... be patient..
Internalise it..
thanks rachel dear.. for the surprise text message i received this morning... thanks dear... I gathered you're also facing ups and downs too rite- from huiling's blog.. so.. ganbatte! Smile.. the day can only be brighter!! Pathway of the righteous will just shine brighter.... banana told me that u'll be back in dec? .. email me ok.. i miss U!
DUST.. I hate dust... Now.. my left eye is swollen...
I don't like to not be in the known..
YEt.. i know this is what God wants me to develop.. THE gift of long suffering... A&B is round the corner.. YET I'm still in transition...
I know He is my Provider.. ANd Thanks for closing the door (the one i went yesterday.. She impressed with me.. bUt.. felt that it's not the ONE...)
Now.... the word "sen -sei" rings in my head.. but I shall not be distracted.. That's something i want to do.. but not now..
It's only the second week.. waiting... be patient..
Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7
Internalise it..
thanks rachel dear.. for the surprise text message i received this morning... thanks dear... I gathered you're also facing ups and downs too rite- from huiling's blog.. so.. ganbatte! Smile.. the day can only be brighter!! Pathway of the righteous will just shine brighter.... banana told me that u'll be back in dec? .. email me ok.. i miss U!
Monday 30 October 2006
counselling
Funny how I always end up comforting others.. when I feel like pits low...
Flaire for counselling?
thru that msn conversation... I sense that I should wait...... Ya.. I will
Flaire for counselling?
thru that msn conversation... I sense that I should wait...... Ya.. I will
the room in the Zen feel office
This is indeed rather surprising. I almost didn't want to go. I'd a rather good talk with the fc and yes she seemd rather keen to take me for accountg job- wat i nvr applied. She was impressd by my schs and also my command of chinese. Should i take this 2mths contract job ? OR wait 4 the othrs to call? Pray. Praying. gotta reply by tmw....
deja vu feeling...
6 years ago.. I did exactly what i was doing now.... started in Sept.. waiting test over in Dec.. Yet I know FAther God will give me one of the BEST birthday present this year....
Rain.. why can't it rain today? I long to take a walk in the rain.... :)
Rain.. why can't it rain today? I long to take a walk in the rain.... :)
wedding...
Just attended my ex-colleague's wedding.. it's kind of a fairyland theme... ( hmmm in line with my "fairy tales" posted earlier.. ?). the first wedding out of many up coming ones... met some of my good buddy buddy there.. like ls, mei, cherie.. and also pple that I don't really feel like seeing.. yet i smile..
silly thoughts went thru' my mind when ming siang (the groom) marched in with his pretty wife.. in my mind I was picturing how mine will be like.. silly cuz the person that came to mind was ... (No way.. no way.. ) I can't see it happen.. really cannot... YET.. I know it will be pictureperfect... mine.. i mean.. (expect to hear me dwell more.. since.. this is the start of the train WeddingDinners in line .. next being this sat.. )
Monday... shall i go D or not? I think I will move on.. :) don't wanna sprint... I jog not sprint..
I think some get to see my "holy fire" at work today.. bro.. :) thanks.. cuz those more deserving ones won't appreciate that...
I finally got my LEAVE form.. YET.. i'm officially in choir TILL processed.. (i'm happy yet... I felt torn...) And.. claire did a very interesting interview with me.. ( never failed to remind my dotter that next month will see a plus one in age.. ya.. I know I look like a freshie grad...)
I think i drank a bit more red wine.. (just one and half glass.. ) now sleepy...
but.. I want to tarry first...
ANd.. I think I better go doc tmw.. my EYEs are feeling the stingy feeling.. and yellowish? (andrew and ting both commented that they see yellow strains... ) Pray for healing...
oooo.. I have encountered SUB standard svc at a poshpOsh stall this morning while bUying vouchers for birthday gift on a leader's behalf... I know she is new.. BUT can u imagine passing vouchers WITHOUT envelope to customer... And Only handed over the receipt upon my request.. AND when the card didn't go thru.. she didn't try again.. and told me it is DISHONORED.. in a disdained manner (later i check my card.. it's working perfectly fine). I will visit the store ONLY if experienced staff is ard ... Sorry. but I regard quality service as a prime reason for repeated patronage..
Not to mention a more than enthusatic hello from one i thought was more than a hibyefriend early this morning.. maybe my eyes were wide shut then... tsk tsk tsk
okie, enuff of stuff and crap... tarry and encounter time..yeah !
silly thoughts went thru' my mind when ming siang (the groom) marched in with his pretty wife.. in my mind I was picturing how mine will be like.. silly cuz the person that came to mind was ... (No way.. no way.. ) I can't see it happen.. really cannot... YET.. I know it will be pictureperfect... mine.. i mean.. (expect to hear me dwell more.. since.. this is the start of the train WeddingDinners in line .. next being this sat.. )
Monday... shall i go D or not? I think I will move on.. :) don't wanna sprint... I jog not sprint..
I think some get to see my "holy fire" at work today.. bro.. :) thanks.. cuz those more deserving ones won't appreciate that...
I finally got my LEAVE form.. YET.. i'm officially in choir TILL processed.. (i'm happy yet... I felt torn...) And.. claire did a very interesting interview with me.. ( never failed to remind my dotter that next month will see a plus one in age.. ya.. I know I look like a freshie grad...)
I think i drank a bit more red wine.. (just one and half glass.. ) now sleepy...
but.. I want to tarry first...
ANd.. I think I better go doc tmw.. my EYEs are feeling the stingy feeling.. and yellowish? (andrew and ting both commented that they see yellow strains... ) Pray for healing...
oooo.. I have encountered SUB standard svc at a poshpOsh stall this morning while bUying vouchers for birthday gift on a leader's behalf... I know she is new.. BUT can u imagine passing vouchers WITHOUT envelope to customer... And Only handed over the receipt upon my request.. AND when the card didn't go thru.. she didn't try again.. and told me it is DISHONORED.. in a disdained manner (later i check my card.. it's working perfectly fine). I will visit the store ONLY if experienced staff is ard ... Sorry. but I regard quality service as a prime reason for repeated patronage..
Not to mention a more than enthusatic hello from one i thought was more than a hibyefriend early this morning.. maybe my eyes were wide shut then... tsk tsk tsk
okie, enuff of stuff and crap... tarry and encounter time..yeah !
Sunday 29 October 2006
long sunday
0800 - 1100 : report for choir.. my last time to serve?
1100- 1230: rush down to ed hardy, buy voucher.. then back to report pM
1330 - 1530/1600: pm
16:00 to 16:30 :admin meeting
17:00 - 18:00: head home to change.. to head for ex-colleague's wedding..
1930 - : wedding dinner
monday.. I have to face it with faith ... I foresee a LOT of explanations... Can i avoid it? I don't think so..
1100- 1230: rush down to ed hardy, buy voucher.. then back to report pM
1330 - 1530/1600: pm
16:00 to 16:30 :admin meeting
17:00 - 18:00: head home to change.. to head for ex-colleague's wedding..
1930 - : wedding dinner
monday.. I have to face it with faith ... I foresee a LOT of explanations... Can i avoid it? I don't think so..
Saturday 28 October 2006
At laupasat
They are eating. (picture taken using my SE .. fun ya?) I'm n0t. The song playing at the backgrd (some radio station playing the 90 hits...) - if wishes came true. I knOw mine will. NOw on air - my fave song, boyzone's no matter what.
ALmost didn't want to go.. cuz. I'm tired... went to the wealth seminar today.. ya.. I got two friends.. and yes.. One of them can give me potential lotsa wapi... BUT bottomline.. am i waivering again.. YET I know.. this is not what I'm called to do... I can sell if I want.. BUT don't want to start something that I won't follow thru.. unless she (my friend) wants me to... YET still waiting...
this came to mind.. a phrase that my sec sch mate, anqi, taught me - 吃玻璃长大的.. hmm.. haha...well.. discard this negativity!!
wait...
No other way... but wait..
testing of patience.. faith.. just simple trust..
thanks to those who still believe in me.. my cgls.. ryan and steven.. my lovely members.. joyce, corinth, eugene, darren who has been pillar of encouragement ... my dear "longest knowing" pal.. sandi.. one of my best pals since pri 6 (who first brought me to Christ.. ) .. and lovely carmen..
and most importantly, my Lord and Saviour.. Jesus and FAther God.. and My guide and teacher.. the Holy Spirit..
people might jeer and question and may not understand.. yet I know you won't.. I love you...
testing of patience.. faith.. just simple trust..
thanks to those who still believe in me.. my cgls.. ryan and steven.. my lovely members.. joyce, corinth, eugene, darren who has been pillar of encouragement ... my dear "longest knowing" pal.. sandi.. one of my best pals since pri 6 (who first brought me to Christ.. ) .. and lovely carmen..
and most importantly, my Lord and Saviour.. Jesus and FAther God.. and My guide and teacher.. the Holy Spirit..
people might jeer and question and may not understand.. yet I know you won't.. I love you...
Friday 27 October 2006
thanks...
received a very encouraging sms from one of my member... never expected that... wa.. nearly brought tears to my eyes.. CUZ it was that UNexpected.. Didn't know that i wore my feelings on my face.. he actually said that I looked quite stressed these few weeks... didn't know that I actually matter to some of them....
spoke to carmen last nite.. thanks gal... I will be your first client ok? :)
and my cgl.. I know i've put you in a difficult spot.. Really sorry... I will move on.. and be wiser...
spoke to two persons just now.. one counter-offered... one said to keep me in view.. well well.. :) anyway.. had contacted LS.. that one is rather positive.. (yet i know the env might be fierce... ) hope to hear from the sillybank soon...
spoke to carmen last nite.. thanks gal... I will be your first client ok? :)
and my cgl.. I know i've put you in a difficult spot.. Really sorry... I will move on.. and be wiser...
spoke to two persons just now.. one counter-offered... one said to keep me in view.. well well.. :) anyway.. had contacted LS.. that one is rather positive.. (yet i know the env might be fierce... ) hope to hear from the sillybank soon...
Fairy Tales II
Princess would wish that she resides in the world above and not in the reality...
Yet.. Not now...
Reality... princess get chunky bits of education of life... from the dearest around her... In some ways, she has been rebellious.. Unconsciously... she might have hurt some of those around her with some of the decisions she made... looking back... she understand.. for every cause, there is an effect.. BUT she can't simply just live her lives for others right?
She knows as a result of her actions. she has caused immense inconvenience and unnecessary trouble to someone.. As part of the crew, she knew that he would resent her "unresponsible" actions of aborting the flight due to her height phobia (which is one of reason, but not the main) when the plane has not taken off... yet, as her family... her brother... he has to care for her welfare too... Princess doesn't want to put him in a difficult spot.. she felt bad to involve so many parties as a result of her irresponsible decision to fly by plane when she knew she don't want to and couldn't... She just thought it will be fun.. and yes... she was immatured to just think about herself... (and forgot that many others would be involved to enable her to take flight...) NOw.. she wanted to abort the flight cuz she knew this is no time for play and trial and error.. but she gotta face what she's called to do.. It's fun to her to just experience...
YET.. now.. she realised... there is a HUGE price to pay... a very HUGE price...
all princess wanted to do now is to hide and NOT face those she has disappointed.. She wanted to help them realising their dreams BUT she also wants to realise her own dream... Now all she wanted is to withdraw and hide...
Yet.. Not now...
Reality... princess get chunky bits of education of life... from the dearest around her... In some ways, she has been rebellious.. Unconsciously... she might have hurt some of those around her with some of the decisions she made... looking back... she understand.. for every cause, there is an effect.. BUT she can't simply just live her lives for others right?
She knows as a result of her actions. she has caused immense inconvenience and unnecessary trouble to someone.. As part of the crew, she knew that he would resent her "unresponsible" actions of aborting the flight due to her height phobia (which is one of reason, but not the main) when the plane has not taken off... yet, as her family... her brother... he has to care for her welfare too... Princess doesn't want to put him in a difficult spot.. she felt bad to involve so many parties as a result of her irresponsible decision to fly by plane when she knew she don't want to and couldn't... She just thought it will be fun.. and yes... she was immatured to just think about herself... (and forgot that many others would be involved to enable her to take flight...) NOw.. she wanted to abort the flight cuz she knew this is no time for play and trial and error.. but she gotta face what she's called to do.. It's fun to her to just experience...
YET.. now.. she realised... there is a HUGE price to pay... a very HUGE price...
all princess wanted to do now is to hide and NOT face those she has disappointed.. She wanted to help them realising their dreams BUT she also wants to realise her own dream... Now all she wanted is to withdraw and hide...
Thursday 26 October 2006
Where is Centennial tower?
Got a surprise call this afternoon from a Miss Sharon.. Well.. very efficient.. I sent an email on sat.. and they gave me a call today! Maybe cause I was having lunch with birthday gal Ivory.. Vory.. happy happy birthday once again..
so am going to the Centennial Tower in less than 8 hours time.. well.. let's just see what's gonna happen...
it has been a looong day and i don't want to dwell anymore on it.. yet, was encouraged by one of the sms i received end of the day.. and yes.. also my evening spent with my looooongest friend on earth.. (longest cuz I knew her since tao nan days.. ahah...) :) amazing how we still link up after not meeting up for so long...
another mini reunion should come on shumin's wedding on nov. hmm.. haha.. the sole one at the s23 table with no rings adorned on finger... tsk tsk..
Carmen.. so sorry if you reading this and this appears to be YET another parable.. (the earlier post) .. but maybe u will understand though... :)GUILT MANAGEMENT - from the Leadership File
Be at ease.
You can only do what you can do.
If you've done what you can do, what else can you do?
Don't feel guilty for what you cannot do.
You are who you are and you do what you do.
You are not God.
Do what you can do and He'll do what you cannot do.
You can only do what you can do.
If you've done what you can do, what else can you do?
Don't feel guilty for what you cannot do.
You are who you are and you do what you do.
You are not God.
Do what you can do and He'll do what you cannot do.
the Interrogation.. the guilt trip...
Lynnette wondered what had she done wrong. Okay, she admitted that she has had indicated the option of entering into this course, PA300, hastily when the well-intentioned friend has told her repeatedly to consider her choice with great care and really to pray about it. Lynnette who was tired of the mundane, boring course TA 304 she was currently doing, she jumped at the chance to switch course at the first chance to take PA 300 instead of TA 305 (the next module in TA) ... and yes in what she deemed as a word from God, she conveniently flipped the Bible and hey presto... the book just opened at a page.. she scouted around.. and found this couple of verses that described what she wanted... SO.. she filled in the form to switch course...
Lynnette went through a couple of weeks of orientation.. found it interesting... yet she couldn't engaged in it.. Studying and passing for the pre-req modules were easy for her (since she loved to study..) BUT when she stepped into the Actual course in full steam.. she realised she came to dread attending the lectures and attempting the tutorials sessions of PA300.. And yes.. she came to drag her feet to PA300 tutorials. She knew that Mrs Ingari was very patient with her and yes might have spent extra efforts in helping her to get into this course (as it was out of the norm for mid-term transfer). However, as time passed, Lynnette came to realise that she couldn't make the head or tail out of the PA 300 practical applications. She just realised that she has hastily chose the easy way out to switch from TA 305 to PA 300 without getting through TA 305.. cuz Lynnette just couldn't stand the routine keypunching, no. crunching YET she loved the logic behind TA305.
After two weeks of struggling at PA300, Lynnette went to Mrs Ingari for help.. requesting to revert to TA306 since only two weeks had passed and she would be able to catch up at TA 306. (with her explanation that she had no passion toward PA course and that yes, she might have heard wrongly.) To Lynnette s surprise.. Mrs Ingari tried to persuade her to stick with PA300 as Lynnette had prayed about the switch before deciding and hence should not waiver.. Else how can she take charge of her cheerleading squad when she was so indecisive and lack of faith even in God. Miss Sudarma also added that she had forewarned Lynnette to pray, seek a Word before deciding the switch. And that she had given Lynnette ample warning of what's to come.. eg.. the doubts.. the waivering... the decision to revert back to TA 305.
Lynnette wanted so much to tell Mrs Ingari and Miss Sudarma of how she arrived at "THE WORD" and the fact that she didn't give much of a thought and plunged in head first. YET.. she told Miss Sudarma and Mrs Ingari (and yes.. the dean as well) that she had considered all factors prior to the switch.. BUT she kept silent.. the dean wanted Lynnette to head home and pray.. if no Word from God, she should exercise her faith to plough at PA300 Lynnette knew deep down if she wanted, she could.. but she would be living in misery.. like how she went thru' her high school, and she desperately wanted to go ARTS then).
After what seemed like back to back interrogation by Mrs Ingari, Miss Sudarma and the dean, Lynnette really felt like a worm in the apple and not the apple of God's eye.. Felt GUILTY for the time and effort that Miss Sudarma said that Mrs Ingari had put into hYet.. she learnt the lesson the PAINFUL way... Be wise in all her decision that's God's centered (not being religious though.. such as taking Religion 101 when she called to be a Japanese Language and culture expertise) and NOT to seek God hastily.. and Learn to HEAR from God in full .. not in parts.. In doubt.. Seek and confirm and reconfirm; and not do what you deem fit.
Yet, Lynnette was comforted by the sole friend that support her stand.." thank You" she said.. "at least, I know that there is no condemnation in making a wrong choice when you repent. i really appreciate you for believing in me still." ..
Lynnette knew that she had failed (in her decision making process), to the extent that Some doubt on her capabilities/leadership abilities in OTHER areas.. yet.. she knew she would not quit, in spite of what others said regarding her (be it STRAIGHT at her face, or INDIRECTLY.) Yet, she respect them still as she regarded them as her teachers.
Lynnette went through a couple of weeks of orientation.. found it interesting... yet she couldn't engaged in it.. Studying and passing for the pre-req modules were easy for her (since she loved to study..) BUT when she stepped into the Actual course in full steam.. she realised she came to dread attending the lectures and attempting the tutorials sessions of PA300.. And yes.. she came to drag her feet to PA300 tutorials. She knew that Mrs Ingari was very patient with her and yes might have spent extra efforts in helping her to get into this course (as it was out of the norm for mid-term transfer). However, as time passed, Lynnette came to realise that she couldn't make the head or tail out of the PA 300 practical applications. She just realised that she has hastily chose the easy way out to switch from TA 305 to PA 300 without getting through TA 305.. cuz Lynnette just couldn't stand the routine keypunching, no. crunching YET she loved the logic behind TA305.
After two weeks of struggling at PA300, Lynnette went to Mrs Ingari for help.. requesting to revert to TA306 since only two weeks had passed and she would be able to catch up at TA 306. (with her explanation that she had no passion toward PA course and that yes, she might have heard wrongly.) To Lynnette s surprise.. Mrs Ingari tried to persuade her to stick with PA300 as Lynnette had prayed about the switch before deciding and hence should not waiver.. Else how can she take charge of her cheerleading squad when she was so indecisive and lack of faith even in God. Miss Sudarma also added that she had forewarned Lynnette to pray, seek a Word before deciding the switch. And that she had given Lynnette ample warning of what's to come.. eg.. the doubts.. the waivering... the decision to revert back to TA 305.
Lynnette wanted so much to tell Mrs Ingari and Miss Sudarma of how she arrived at "THE WORD" and the fact that she didn't give much of a thought and plunged in head first. YET.. she told Miss Sudarma and Mrs Ingari (and yes.. the dean as well) that she had considered all factors prior to the switch.. BUT she kept silent.. the dean wanted Lynnette to head home and pray.. if no Word from God, she should exercise her faith to plough at PA300 Lynnette knew deep down if she wanted, she could.. but she would be living in misery.. like how she went thru' her high school, and she desperately wanted to go ARTS then).
After what seemed like back to back interrogation by Mrs Ingari, Miss Sudarma and the dean, Lynnette really felt like a worm in the apple and not the apple of God's eye.. Felt GUILTY for the time and effort that Miss Sudarma said that Mrs Ingari had put into hYet.. she learnt the lesson the PAINFUL way... Be wise in all her decision that's God's centered (not being religious though.. such as taking Religion 101 when she called to be a Japanese Language and culture expertise) and NOT to seek God hastily.. and Learn to HEAR from God in full .. not in parts.. In doubt.. Seek and confirm and reconfirm; and not do what you deem fit.
Yet, Lynnette was comforted by the sole friend that support her stand.." thank You" she said.. "at least, I know that there is no condemnation in making a wrong choice when you repent. i really appreciate you for believing in me still." ..
A victor is not one that never fails, but one that never quit.
Lynnette knew that she had failed (in her decision making process), to the extent that Some doubt on her capabilities/leadership abilities in OTHER areas.. yet.. she knew she would not quit, in spite of what others said regarding her (be it STRAIGHT at her face, or INDIRECTLY.) Yet, she respect them still as she regarded them as her teachers.
Monday 23 October 2006
WoRds...
well... your stature will be affected by your manner of speech.. the vocab that you use... well.. i was surprised at the choice of vocab some used in expressing their heightend emotions towards certain situation he/she faced in a conversation exchange i was part of (merely listening...). Pretty Shocked.. CUZ.. well.. I never expect the usage of alternative words (in replacement of words NOT found in dictionary.. at least the paper version for school goers..) by him/her cuz he/she was actually talking to a relative new person.. (absolute term not new.. in another dimemnsion... new...)
well.. being in the world but not of the world... so.. yes.. we need not engage the world via use of the "expressive" lingo.. (true form or alternate form) well.. english is such a extensive language.. surely.. there are other words suitable to describe intense emotions... hence... never expect that ... well.. well.. thought I'd high-lighted this to him/her before... last year? well.. well... ? Not being too legalistic ba.. nor am i expecting Queen's English.. but not that expressive vOcab - even in alternate rorm..
well.. well.. another thing that irrrates me.. MCP.. and making decision bypassing auth.. (actual/ assumed/ delegated.. whatever)... Holy Spirit... help me... urgh... to overlook this.. yet i can't entrust more....
well.. being in the world but not of the world... so.. yes.. we need not engage the world via use of the "expressive" lingo.. (true form or alternate form) well.. english is such a extensive language.. surely.. there are other words suitable to describe intense emotions... hence... never expect that ... well.. well.. thought I'd high-lighted this to him/her before... last year? well.. well... ? Not being too legalistic ba.. nor am i expecting Queen's English.. but not that expressive vOcab - even in alternate rorm..
well.. well.. another thing that irrrates me.. MCP.. and making decision bypassing auth.. (actual/ assumed/ delegated.. whatever)... Holy Spirit... help me... urgh... to overlook this.. yet i can't entrust more....
Fairy Tales
"... and they live happily ever after.."
the good old happy ending that one may look forward to seeing at the end of a story...
I think so.. at least me...
can fairy tales translate into reality... well.. dreams lead to vision and vision CAN come to pass... Are fairy tales some form of dreams..?
princess miOne @ the fairyland... well.. like the fave song from Snow White goes.. "some day ,,,, "
dreaming takes away the tension build up this couple of weeks.. Met bro Andrew @ attributes.. well.. he asked me abt my new job.. Told him that the question might not stand.. he told me that he was astonished @ my decision.. I too... (well well.. )but he seemed relieved when i told him it's no longer new... cuz... Well.. what shall i say.. afterall.. he's still my 1st cgl... one that saw me thru the infant years...
well.. i guess D day again later today... as the chinese saying goes... 长痛不如短痛
the good old happy ending that one may look forward to seeing at the end of a story...
I think so.. at least me...
can fairy tales translate into reality... well.. dreams lead to vision and vision CAN come to pass... Are fairy tales some form of dreams..?
princess miOne @ the fairyland... well.. like the fave song from Snow White goes.. "some day ,,,, "
dreaming takes away the tension build up this couple of weeks.. Met bro Andrew @ attributes.. well.. he asked me abt my new job.. Told him that the question might not stand.. he told me that he was astonished @ my decision.. I too... (well well.. )but he seemed relieved when i told him it's no longer new... cuz... Well.. what shall i say.. afterall.. he's still my 1st cgl... one that saw me thru the infant years...
well.. i guess D day again later today... as the chinese saying goes... 长痛不如短痛
Sunday 22 October 2006
My breakfast.
Happy sight rite? Little treat 4 me cuz it had been a long week. Ya, self-encouragement to princess mione that she found n convictd of her purpose.
smile.. am i smiling?
maybe before service no.. after yeah.. (encompassing many reasons)
making DECisION no.2 is much sweeter than sticking to DECISION no.1.
service today just confirm the out of the suddent actions this morning to email...
YET.. past is past.. today was a bad day to have the interview.. yet all things work for good..
finally.. after repeated audible reprimand.. It surfaced.. the root source of it all.. I don't really want to say it.. YET he already know it Before I say.. he just wanted to me acknowledge it and move on.. cuz I have given up THAT right.. ( kinda insane to want hold on to that.. i don't want..
making DECisION no.2 is much sweeter than sticking to DECISION no.1.
service today just confirm the out of the suddent actions this morning to email...
YET.. past is past.. today was a bad day to have the interview.. yet all things work for good..
finally.. after repeated audible reprimand.. It surfaced.. the root source of it all.. I don't really want to say it.. YET he already know it Before I say.. he just wanted to me acknowledge it and move on.. cuz I have given up THAT right.. ( kinda insane to want hold on to that.. i don't want..
Saturday 21 October 2006
the INTERVIEW
am Going for the interview @ 4pm...
AM NERVOUS... cuz I'm not prepared...
nope.. not job interview.. (hmmm... hmmm..?) but the L-interview... just learnt abt it ONE hr agO....
AM NERVOUS... cuz I'm not prepared...
nope.. not job interview.. (hmmm... hmmm..?) but the L-interview... just learnt abt it ONE hr agO....
application
i just did...
and felt the peace..
just a try..
if it is so..
it will be so...
if not...
life goes on...
keep trying...
WOn't be as bad as last night...
and felt the peace..
just a try..
if it is so..
it will be so...
if not...
life goes on...
keep trying...
WOn't be as bad as last night...
Thursday 19 October 2006
Wednesday 18 October 2006
Sent via error
Didn't realised dat i've sent the draft sms to bro jeff until i saw his reply. Aiz my keypad nt locked. Aniwae its meant to be. At least won't hv to decide choir or cg. And lesser (i hope) short n stern msgs frm ... Cuz sometime, mst of the time, i've askd 4 it cuz its just 75%. Nw no excuse nt to give the 101%.
time to look at the
MACRO... not the micro . Yet there is a tendency to look into the nittygritties the Minute issues BUT neglect the most crucial issue...
And the story of reaping comes after i sow challenges into a members' life... Fun rite?? Feel that this gotta stop... else.. strawberry bitter... can't have this mindset.. else.. work will be difficult for me..... heeheehee.. think carmen might have the answer.. haha... haha.... :)
And the story of reaping comes after i sow challenges into a members' life... Fun rite?? Feel that this gotta stop... else.. strawberry bitter... can't have this mindset.. else.. work will be difficult for me..... heeheehee.. think carmen might have the answer.. haha... haha.... :)
what advanced degree should i pursue???
hmmm...
hmm guess what I am trained as @ ntu? haha... accountancy... ahahh... perhaps. should have listened to the small voice when it was time to choose sch to study.. yet... all things happen for a reason ya?
in the future.. after sot.. :)
| You Should Get a MFA (Masters of Fine Arts) |
 You're a blooming artistic talent, even if you aren't quite convinced. You'd make an incredible artist, photographer, or film maker. |
hmm guess what I am trained as @ ntu? haha... accountancy... ahahh... perhaps. should have listened to the small voice when it was time to choose sch to study.. yet... all things happen for a reason ya?
in the future.. after sot.. :)
Tuesday 17 October 2006
Misty Singapore
Wa, air quality getting frm bad to worse. .tis view of downtown east frm corridor.
Today was a good day so far, met an ex-colleague 4 lunch,did my 1st informal fact find/mini presentatn, she impressd. Ü confidence booster. Went home first aft lunch meetg and spendg some quality time wif mom, plus i was carryg real heavy stuff. On my way to suntec nw. Ü
Monday 16 October 2006
a looong week...
haven't been blogging...
not that nothing been's happening... In fact... I'm feel like I'm walking on broken glass 24/7 very recently.. cuz.. I get to be assessed 24/7 now...
sometimes.. I just feel transparent... Transparent .... or perhaps...it's not me.. bUt the oblivious...
well.. taking pride that servant is not meant to be seen.. Be the greatest servant of all...
it's been a LOoong day today... went to service.. went to shaun's holy matrimony... didn't expect her to invite me but she invited me last thurs when i popped my head into her room to rtn her $.. hmmm.. talked to one of her ex-classmate cuz she was alone too.. ah.. hope I'd sOrta ministered to her.. :) but the wedding at the Glasshouse at Art Museum pretty pretty... anyway.. didn't really stay for the refreshment ... jutted down to cityhall ... later realised that the helpers' sesssion was cancelled.. tsk tsk... roamed ard cityhall... until i realised merchant court swissOtel not @ swissotel..ahha... tsk... little i realised that it was a buffet kinda dinner we were having with steven.. aiya.. didn't really eat alot.. cUz I don't eat much really.. but it was good fellowship.. ahha... think cherie is an interesting gal.. hit off rather well with her...hmm.. haha..
well.. enuff of rest... for one month... time to put to practise what I'd studied for past ONE month...
oooooh btw... TOday is OCt 16.. so.. less than a month to princess' mione hatchie day... ahha... this week.. I think we'd helped celebrate my cgl's birthday thrice! ahha.. glad that he was SURPRISED by the celebration after the makeup cg.. hhaa.. hmm princess mione can spring surprises too.. ahha..
well... the sa with surname tan has been trying to infiltrate my grey matter with badbad negative negative thots and ya.. I nearly fall prey to his scam by trying to push all away via protrayal of the characteristic of a bull.. haha.. however.. that didn't last loong.. YET... period of moulding and pruning has just begun... :)
not that nothing been's happening... In fact... I'm feel like I'm walking on broken glass 24/7 very recently.. cuz.. I get to be assessed 24/7 now...
sometimes.. I just feel transparent... Transparent .... or perhaps...it's not me.. bUt the oblivious...
well.. taking pride that servant is not meant to be seen.. Be the greatest servant of all...
it's been a LOoong day today... went to service.. went to shaun's holy matrimony... didn't expect her to invite me but she invited me last thurs when i popped my head into her room to rtn her $.. hmmm.. talked to one of her ex-classmate cuz she was alone too.. ah.. hope I'd sOrta ministered to her.. :) but the wedding at the Glasshouse at Art Museum pretty pretty... anyway.. didn't really stay for the refreshment ... jutted down to cityhall ... later realised that the helpers' sesssion was cancelled.. tsk tsk... roamed ard cityhall... until i realised merchant court swissOtel not @ swissotel..ahha... tsk... little i realised that it was a buffet kinda dinner we were having with steven.. aiya.. didn't really eat alot.. cUz I don't eat much really.. but it was good fellowship.. ahha... think cherie is an interesting gal.. hit off rather well with her...hmm.. haha..
well.. enuff of rest... for one month... time to put to practise what I'd studied for past ONE month...
oooooh btw... TOday is OCt 16.. so.. less than a month to princess' mione hatchie day... ahha... this week.. I think we'd helped celebrate my cgl's birthday thrice! ahha.. glad that he was SURPRISED by the celebration after the makeup cg.. hhaa.. hmm princess mione can spring surprises too.. ahha..
well... the sa with surname tan has been trying to infiltrate my grey matter with badbad negative negative thots and ya.. I nearly fall prey to his scam by trying to push all away via protrayal of the characteristic of a bull.. haha.. however.. that didn't last loong.. YET... period of moulding and pruning has just begun... :)
Tuesday 10 October 2006
All cleared... Praise the Lord!
God's words will not return to Him void!
DEspite of the "encouraging" comments from the tutor and some others on the past results of the candidates.. (such as "50+%" passing rate.. , you definitely HAVE to study/ memorise A LOT to pass...), i only managed to squeeze oUt 6 -7 hours to cram the 1 inch thick A4 size book... (cuz sat whole day gone, Sun half a day... and morning going to office...). ALmost contemplated NOT to go to morning devotion when i still have 8 chapters (half an inch thick of the text) to digest at 330am.. (translate: 4 more hours to go...) YEt, just felt that I HAVE to go to the devotion and Praise the Lord I did.. (cUz word in season.. and word of encouragement to me.. perhaps to share another time...) so thought that i would still have 3 hrs to revise after AM devotion
Yet, i didn't know there's weekly meeting.. So..by the time it ended.. it was 215.++ so.. no more time to revise.. went to exam with estella and sis catherine.. well.. we made use of the remaining 45 min to comb thru as much as possible.. well.. the text seemd like GREEK to me by then...
exam time.. well.. there are 50 questions in all.. frankly i was only confident in perhaps 20+ of them (and passing % is 70%.. ie. i can afford at most 15 incorrect answers...) finished 1 round of checking and there's 2 minutes to go.. Didn't have the faith to click on the "finished" button.. so watch the clock counting down.. yet i have the assurance that I will pass.. clock was ticking.. 5...... 4 ....... 3 ....... 2 .... 1
the computer screen flashed the word "PASS".. I was esctatic... And.. God began to remind me once again what His promise.. Cuz I told God.. if really that's where He wanted me to head... let me to clear ALL the entry exams at the 1st sitting.. well.. GOd never lies.. and really, i won't know how to do it without God.. cuz I was pressed for time to revise... never have the luxury to revise after lessons.. cuz the course was structured in such a manner that you will take the exam on the next day or so after the LAST lesson of the module... Well.. I could have trust in my flesh and do everything that a typcial person will do.. (ie.. to pass my exam ... I will have to just only STUDY and push other things away...) but I choose to do it God's way.. so.. I didn't change my typical schedule and still go meeting, cgm, choir prac, served when it's my team is on... Well.. what you sow you will reap.. was enlightened by one of Joyce Meyer's podcast recently.. many people neglect their time with God.. Well.. principle of sowing and reaping.. if you need finances, you sow finances... hence, if you need time, sow time to the Lord..
hmmm think huiling must have come by here once in a while.. (gal, do tag me leh.. I love WORDs of affirmation... ) cuz lian was telling me .. :)
char siew gal... your rolly polly will come soon.. maybe after i close my 1st deal okay... glad u like the greeny.. turtle/ tortorise..
okok.. time to get ready for work...
DEspite of the "encouraging" comments from the tutor and some others on the past results of the candidates.. (such as "50+%" passing rate.. , you definitely HAVE to study/ memorise A LOT to pass...), i only managed to squeeze oUt 6 -7 hours to cram the 1 inch thick A4 size book... (cuz sat whole day gone, Sun half a day... and morning going to office...). ALmost contemplated NOT to go to morning devotion when i still have 8 chapters (half an inch thick of the text) to digest at 330am.. (translate: 4 more hours to go...) YEt, just felt that I HAVE to go to the devotion and Praise the Lord I did.. (cUz word in season.. and word of encouragement to me.. perhaps to share another time...) so thought that i would still have 3 hrs to revise after AM devotion
Yet, i didn't know there's weekly meeting.. So..by the time it ended.. it was 215.++ so.. no more time to revise.. went to exam with estella and sis catherine.. well.. we made use of the remaining 45 min to comb thru as much as possible.. well.. the text seemd like GREEK to me by then...
exam time.. well.. there are 50 questions in all.. frankly i was only confident in perhaps 20+ of them (and passing % is 70%.. ie. i can afford at most 15 incorrect answers...) finished 1 round of checking and there's 2 minutes to go.. Didn't have the faith to click on the "finished" button.. so watch the clock counting down.. yet i have the assurance that I will pass.. clock was ticking.. 5...... 4 ....... 3 ....... 2 .... 1
the computer screen flashed the word "PASS".. I was esctatic... And.. God began to remind me once again what His promise.. Cuz I told God.. if really that's where He wanted me to head... let me to clear ALL the entry exams at the 1st sitting.. well.. GOd never lies.. and really, i won't know how to do it without God.. cuz I was pressed for time to revise... never have the luxury to revise after lessons.. cuz the course was structured in such a manner that you will take the exam on the next day or so after the LAST lesson of the module... Well.. I could have trust in my flesh and do everything that a typcial person will do.. (ie.. to pass my exam ... I will have to just only STUDY and push other things away...) but I choose to do it God's way.. so.. I didn't change my typical schedule and still go meeting, cgm, choir prac, served when it's my team is on... Well.. what you sow you will reap.. was enlightened by one of Joyce Meyer's podcast recently.. many people neglect their time with God.. Well.. principle of sowing and reaping.. if you need finances, you sow finances... hence, if you need time, sow time to the Lord..
hmmm think huiling must have come by here once in a while.. (gal, do tag me leh.. I love WORDs of affirmation... ) cuz lian was telling me .. :)
char siew gal... your rolly polly will come soon.. maybe after i close my 1st deal okay... glad u like the greeny.. turtle/ tortorise..
okok.. time to get ready for work...
Monday 9 October 2006
At tampines mac
Am waitg 4 my membr to give her makeup msg. Haha.. Title is preparing urself 4 a Miracle.
Miracle does happen. To be continued when i get home. Loving tis phone more each day. Allow me to blog o'ver phone.
Sunday 8 October 2006
Revision at popeye's chicken & biscuits at t1
Finishd lunch with carmen at popeye's. Just finishd chapter 1, 14 more to go.. Tis is the view i'm facing, departure hall. Ü
finAlly...
Finally... I told my choir ic that I would have to leave choir soon.. (cuz bro jeff not ard, so i told the covering instead...) I wonder when will be the LAST time to serve.. AHha.. maybe i will be the "excited" person again tmw...
TODAY.. is a day that things just kept going wrong..
1. overslept and mom not happy that I went back to sleep after she woke me up.. (am supposed to go breakfast with her..)
2. missed bus 12.. resulting the need to take cab..
3. choir prac.. legs and hands seemed detached.. Praise the Lord that unlikely i would or can go to the audition for brighter day.. not that i try to "siam" .. but reason is legitimate.. (see 1st paragraph..)
4. missing soundcheck - cUz need to meet steven.. (with the others guys helping steven with cg matters..)well... the session sorta long... ended at 445.. we ran back.. Entrusted our bags with fellow members to bring back to HAll 8 for us.. (don't expect us to bring our bags on stage right?) Then rushed back.. one innocent question sparkled the flame within.. ( stress. makes one vulnerable..) yet.. no pt explaining la..
5. THE FIRST time i set thru' a service (save for 1st service @ chc) WITHOUT my bible, my notebook, my pen, my offering.. and my hp too.. cuz that's the no. that cg stuff would be smsed.. YAh.. I think my expression showed.. (gee i didn't notice steven sitting behind me....)I guessed this is how Mr SA tan decided to distract me.. CUZ.. think only my body was in the hall.. and my mind drifted away until 25% into the sermOn.. for the very 1st time.. [ok, 2nd time .. ist time i sat thru service with A not so sweet smelling attitude was 4 yrs back.. when my NEW cg didn't contact me when i went service.. i purposely sat by myself when i actually saw them (ya.. still young then..).. totally horrendous experience.. ] i sang the praise song like KTV mode... (my flesh can be rather thick at times..) Yet.. I know this can't go on... but the flesh prevailed.. till i stubborn reiterated.. God, I don't have my bible.. So I AM NOT going to say.. "this is my bible... etc" YA.. that stubborn silent rebellion resulted in non-processing of information.. UNTIL I decided to STop this silly staged-rebellion from within.. I forced myself to be RARA.. to cheer... to stop silent-clapping.. ya.. the peace just came... and thank GOd i did not miss the best part...
YET.. the VERY BEST part is I LEFT MY SERMON NOTE ON the chair.. (cuz I don't have my bag with me.. so i left it on the chair when steven was debriefing us.. )never mind.. I will sit in again tmw..
Well.. all things work for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose...
Stubborn streak in me.. made me decided to wait for lian.. haha.. we went bedok interchange for dinner.. We ordered this "half melon".. It was refreshing.. thirst quenching.. (though I don't think i want to makan more watermelon for next few days at least..) we chatted and ya, good for me.. to release and talk...
Well.. reached home ard 1030.. spent some Quality time with dad and mom.. ( haha.. just spent time lo.. sitting with them watching TV - the gogo jacky variety show.. last segment on hide and seek very interesting...) then.. chatted with Robin for half an hour or so.. then.. i was expecting him to call.. and he did.. cuz.. could discern la.. hmmm haha.. not my special someone though... It was my leader.. hmm... different level.. diffferent requirement... I should say I AM very privileged that my life gonna be scrutinised ( already did a couple of times... ) to the nano level.. (aND i have the privilege meet him 6/7 days of the week at least ... haha.. though that seemed rather scary to me initially... Imaging being assessed 24-7 - okie.. not so extreme.. BUT that should not pose a problem...
okie.. I would love to blog more.. but... tired. AND I have yet STARTED on my HI revision.. gotta start ASaP... let me Qt.. sleep and revise...
TODAY.. is a day that things just kept going wrong..
1. overslept and mom not happy that I went back to sleep after she woke me up.. (am supposed to go breakfast with her..)
2. missed bus 12.. resulting the need to take cab..
3. choir prac.. legs and hands seemed detached.. Praise the Lord that unlikely i would or can go to the audition for brighter day.. not that i try to "siam" .. but reason is legitimate.. (see 1st paragraph..)
4. missing soundcheck - cUz need to meet steven.. (with the others guys helping steven with cg matters..)well... the session sorta long... ended at 445.. we ran back.. Entrusted our bags with fellow members to bring back to HAll 8 for us.. (don't expect us to bring our bags on stage right?) Then rushed back.. one innocent question sparkled the flame within.. ( stress. makes one vulnerable..) yet.. no pt explaining la..
5. THE FIRST time i set thru' a service (save for 1st service @ chc) WITHOUT my bible, my notebook, my pen, my offering.. and my hp too.. cuz that's the no. that cg stuff would be smsed.. YAh.. I think my expression showed.. (gee i didn't notice steven sitting behind me....)I guessed this is how Mr SA tan decided to distract me.. CUZ.. think only my body was in the hall.. and my mind drifted away until 25% into the sermOn.. for the very 1st time.. [ok, 2nd time .. ist time i sat thru service with A not so sweet smelling attitude was 4 yrs back.. when my NEW cg didn't contact me when i went service.. i purposely sat by myself when i actually saw them (ya.. still young then..).. totally horrendous experience.. ] i sang the praise song like KTV mode... (my flesh can be rather thick at times..) Yet.. I know this can't go on... but the flesh prevailed.. till i stubborn reiterated.. God, I don't have my bible.. So I AM NOT going to say.. "this is my bible... etc" YA.. that stubborn silent rebellion resulted in non-processing of information.. UNTIL I decided to STop this silly staged-rebellion from within.. I forced myself to be RARA.. to cheer... to stop silent-clapping.. ya.. the peace just came... and thank GOd i did not miss the best part...
YET.. the VERY BEST part is I LEFT MY SERMON NOTE ON the chair.. (cuz I don't have my bag with me.. so i left it on the chair when steven was debriefing us.. )never mind.. I will sit in again tmw..
Well.. all things work for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose...
Stubborn streak in me.. made me decided to wait for lian.. haha.. we went bedok interchange for dinner.. We ordered this "half melon".. It was refreshing.. thirst quenching.. (though I don't think i want to makan more watermelon for next few days at least..) we chatted and ya, good for me.. to release and talk...
Well.. reached home ard 1030.. spent some Quality time with dad and mom.. ( haha.. just spent time lo.. sitting with them watching TV - the gogo jacky variety show.. last segment on hide and seek very interesting...) then.. chatted with Robin for half an hour or so.. then.. i was expecting him to call.. and he did.. cuz.. could discern la.. hmmm haha.. not my special someone though... It was my leader.. hmm... different level.. diffferent requirement... I should say I AM very privileged that my life gonna be scrutinised ( already did a couple of times... ) to the nano level.. (aND i have the privilege meet him 6/7 days of the week at least ... haha.. though that seemed rather scary to me initially... Imaging being assessed 24-7 - okie.. not so extreme.. BUT that should not pose a problem...
okie.. I would love to blog more.. but... tired. AND I have yet STARTED on my HI revision.. gotta start ASaP... let me Qt.. sleep and revise...
Saturday 7 October 2006
haze
the moment i opened the door.. i was hit by the burnt ashy smell in the air...
bad way to start the day...
tOday will be a BUSY day.. think i can forget abt studying the HI text le..
going choir prac [last few? can i stay in choir till my birthday?? :)] soon... tata...
bad way to start the day...
tOday will be a BUSY day.. think i can forget abt studying the HI text le..
going choir prac [last few? can i stay in choir till my birthday?? :)] soon... tata...
Thursday 5 October 2006
Reworked..
I think I'm too "C".
Thank God that his ink ran out.. else.. the songsheet would be... plain jane..
I appreciate his effort.. BUT.. it's outreach leh... PLAIN is not the way la.. I don't want to be "whack" again.. if I can rectify at my end.. i will do it.. the ding dong-ing is too much le...
My head is splitting.. my eyes are closing... Yet.. no one will see.. Well.. so long He does.. that's enuff...
overwhelming day... 3 rejections.. "interesting" confernce call, splitting headache... fully charged phone flat by end of day due to the dingdong sms/ calls... ... informed enhui (by accident) that I'm leaving chOir...
I love my life still...
Thank God that his ink ran out.. else.. the songsheet would be... plain jane..
I appreciate his effort.. BUT.. it's outreach leh... PLAIN is not the way la.. I don't want to be "whack" again.. if I can rectify at my end.. i will do it.. the ding dong-ing is too much le...
My head is splitting.. my eyes are closing... Yet.. no one will see.. Well.. so long He does.. that's enuff...
overwhelming day... 3 rejections.. "interesting" confernce call, splitting headache... fully charged phone flat by end of day due to the dingdong sms/ calls... ... informed enhui (by accident) that I'm leaving chOir...
I love my life still...
10 things I hate about you
I hate it when you kept changing what's need to be done.
I hate it when the words you use on me seemed harsher than the rest.
I hate it when you just kept pounding on me when I've tried what i could.
I hate it when I cannot meet the expectation you have of me.
I hate it b'cos there is nothing much i could do to lessen your burden.
I hate it when i felt resentment towards you when i know i should not.
I hate it when I seemed to do my best, and yet, that's not what you want.
I hate it when I know there are things I want to say but just don't know how...
I hate it cuz there is this mixed feeling within...
I hate it cuz I know i can't bear to hate you..
I hate it when the words you use on me seemed harsher than the rest.
I hate it when you just kept pounding on me when I've tried what i could.
I hate it when I cannot meet the expectation you have of me.
I hate it b'cos there is nothing much i could do to lessen your burden.
I hate it when i felt resentment towards you when i know i should not.
I hate it when I seemed to do my best, and yet, that's not what you want.
I hate it when I know there are things I want to say but just don't know how...
I hate it cuz there is this mixed feeling within...
I hate it cuz I know i can't bear to hate you..
Wednesday 4 October 2006
tuesday... another interestng day...
hmm.. got to know another fellow colleague today.. sharon... As wiltian and sharon was chatting abt serving chinese church.. etc.. during lunch.. well.. suddenly.. was so envious of them.. cuz.. I know I will soon not be able to be on the choir stand.. haiz... Wanted to sms bro Jeff but.. didn't have his no. in my new phone.. so.. didn't.. guessed that I would call him tmw.. the more i procrastinate.. the harder it takes...
hmm... despite of how impossible current situation to hit the forecast on Thurs.. I believe it can be achieved... hmm... Ya.. It can be done.. Amen!
I gotta do what He thinks I can do.. I have to... Someone asks me.. why do you want to switch job.. (from a job that pays you a COMFORTABLE 2-3k job.. to the current one I'm embarking next week...) hmm.. i'm seeking comfort.. I could jolly well stay status quo (both work and ministry...) BUT surely.. there's more to life than a 8 - 530 job.. ANd i guess.. the joy and fulfillment will be derived from attaining the goals of client.. (as u see... my love language in terms of giving is Acts of service.. so.. ahaha.. appropriate right?)
hmm felt that I've been "strongly encouraging" one of my helper a bit on the extreme.. hope she's not too overwhelmed, (hmm I could see the "d" side of me when i speak to her... )...
Stress level for me is on the increasing side... See NEW things that I've to assume and settle ASAP.. leader A & S wants me to GROW GRow grOw... and ya... i will ...
happy MAF.. (wa.. this reminds me of my jc mAF event... wow 10years since my 1st hwa chong mAF.. hahaha.. i know I don't look my age.. Joyce's friend Issac thought I was younger than him!! haha.. yet another who think I'm a freshie grad!) If you are reading this and don't have any plans this thurs.. call me or tag me... we're having a MAF celebration.. @ tanjong pagar area... start 730.. You are cordially invited...
okie.. time to zzzz... AIMS 3! yey!
hmm... despite of how impossible current situation to hit the forecast on Thurs.. I believe it can be achieved... hmm... Ya.. It can be done.. Amen!
I gotta do what He thinks I can do.. I have to... Someone asks me.. why do you want to switch job.. (from a job that pays you a COMFORTABLE 2-3k job.. to the current one I'm embarking next week...) hmm.. i'm seeking comfort.. I could jolly well stay status quo (both work and ministry...) BUT surely.. there's more to life than a 8 - 530 job.. ANd i guess.. the joy and fulfillment will be derived from attaining the goals of client.. (as u see... my love language in terms of giving is Acts of service.. so.. ahaha.. appropriate right?)
hmm felt that I've been "strongly encouraging" one of my helper a bit on the extreme.. hope she's not too overwhelmed, (hmm I could see the "d" side of me when i speak to her... )...
Stress level for me is on the increasing side... See NEW things that I've to assume and settle ASAP.. leader A & S wants me to GROW GRow grOw... and ya... i will ...
happy MAF.. (wa.. this reminds me of my jc mAF event... wow 10years since my 1st hwa chong mAF.. hahaha.. i know I don't look my age.. Joyce's friend Issac thought I was younger than him!! haha.. yet another who think I'm a freshie grad!) If you are reading this and don't have any plans this thurs.. call me or tag me... we're having a MAF celebration.. @ tanjong pagar area... start 730.. You are cordially invited...
okie.. time to zzzz... AIMS 3! yey!
Monday 2 October 2006
First CD!
If you have not buy this cd.. gO and get it... My fave track is now the background music... (actually i love all the tracks... esp the worship songs.. it will be Wow to sing them in cg!!) I want to go children church too!!
After the intense conversation last night... I put on this cd.. and i was weeping... and weeping.. when i was listening to this track...
Love of my life
- lyrics & music by audrey cheong and veroy chua
Every heartbeat says
Thank you Jesus
How You gave Your life
For my salvation
Gaze at the rainbow
I see Your love
I will look to You
Night and Day
Sing of Your great name
How I live again
By Your grace
I see You face to face
You are the Love of my life
My refuge always by my side
Forever I will sing
And worship You my King
You are the One I adore
I give You my heart, My all
Forever You are all I need
Lord You're here with me
Sunday 1 October 2006
the third time..
the same question pOsed three times by three different leaders.. how? Willing to make the cut now? Answer is evident now..
do i really need to see the trickle of blood...
hmmm saw adrian @ foyer 3 this afternoon... tsk.. yes.. he posed me answer the question i would want to avoid... AM i still in choir? He used an interesting analogy... 一刀要见血 .translate: Why haven't I make a clean cut.. a clean choice... (he never fails to remind me that I've YET articulate my desire/calling). Yes.. THe second time this week... A sign??
Am I avoiding this again... had been dragging fOr at least two weeks... it's not that I've not the direction... yet...it's something that I'm not really ready and want to let go.. the friends.. something i like... and yes.. something i'm getting used to... yes.. I want to be part of the team to perform "brighter day".. (yeah, it's gonna be a "wOw" item..... Yet.. don't think that will come to pass.. )
it's a season of letting go.. and adapting.. and assuming new responsiblities... Am i willing to let go? In one aspect of me.. I'd already did... and that took tWo years.. Am i going to take that long tO make up my mind again... but if so...will i miss the kairOs time?
Obedience is the best answer ...
Fri afternoon, received an sms from bro alvin.. Was rather surprised to see that he wants me to help cover him in the subzone attendence in the event that he's away.. i was really surprised... cuz (a) why me? (b) I don't have the red tag ..
This evening... during service... while pastor was sharing on some of the history of our church... God just reminded me... from how He has called me... and all that's happening.. is not a coincidence... is all in accordance to His blueprint for me...
"Ordinary my voice may be, let many lives be impacted when i sing.. " translate. this is not gOnna take place on stage.. but in another setting... truly fully comprehend this now... Yes, my voice is sad to say... ORDINARY (and this has to be illustrated in the plain trUth... in frOnt of the "organising committee" after the debrief... [ya, u have sorta prick the wound that has healed over past couple of days.. sOmetimes... I just wonder... if my voice quality is really that bad .. how did i make it pass the choir auditions ( in sch for the syf competitions.. and in church for ministry)? ]
perhaps.. am in the oversensitive mode again... OR.. i just need an audience to listen to this.. Ya.. was talking to faith this afternoon... sad to see one of my palie in chOir being attached to this gUy who is ah.. not MOG.. and ya.. as a result.. more distant to everyone... hmm.. she told faith that she won't understand cuz she ain't at that age yet..she will understand when she (faith) is at her age.. *Alo...* btw this gal should be at most 22/23? no choice? hmmm won't this put me to a frenzy now? but why settle for kosong teo chew muay when you can endulge in abalone porridge? * i would prefer the abalone porridge... live examples of those who regret choosing the teo chew muay at the slightest complain of hunger... porridge.. *craving for the crystal jade porridge now..* porridge in mind? i think i mught have a certain craving now... i guess i'm not much of a food gourmet.. as long as it fall within my broad limits of tolerance (which is not that difficult to meet.. but not really..).. i can slowly grow to adapt and like it..
porridge parable? hmmm.. crab porridge? haha...
not making sense?
nevermind...
Am I avoiding this again... had been dragging fOr at least two weeks... it's not that I've not the direction... yet...it's something that I'm not really ready and want to let go.. the friends.. something i like... and yes.. something i'm getting used to... yes.. I want to be part of the team to perform "brighter day".. (yeah, it's gonna be a "wOw" item..... Yet.. don't think that will come to pass.. )
it's a season of letting go.. and adapting.. and assuming new responsiblities... Am i willing to let go? In one aspect of me.. I'd already did... and that took tWo years.. Am i going to take that long tO make up my mind again... but if so...will i miss the kairOs time?
Obedience is the best answer ...
Fri afternoon, received an sms from bro alvin.. Was rather surprised to see that he wants me to help cover him in the subzone attendence in the event that he's away.. i was really surprised... cuz (a) why me? (b) I don't have the red tag ..
This evening... during service... while pastor was sharing on some of the history of our church... God just reminded me... from how He has called me... and all that's happening.. is not a coincidence... is all in accordance to His blueprint for me...
"Ordinary my voice may be, let many lives be impacted when i sing.. " translate. this is not gOnna take place on stage.. but in another setting... truly fully comprehend this now... Yes, my voice is sad to say... ORDINARY (and this has to be illustrated in the plain trUth... in frOnt of the "organising committee" after the debrief... [ya, u have sorta prick the wound that has healed over past couple of days.. sOmetimes... I just wonder... if my voice quality is really that bad .. how did i make it pass the choir auditions ( in sch for the syf competitions.. and in church for ministry)? ]
perhaps.. am in the oversensitive mode again... OR.. i just need an audience to listen to this.. Ya.. was talking to faith this afternoon... sad to see one of my palie in chOir being attached to this gUy who is ah.. not MOG.. and ya.. as a result.. more distant to everyone... hmm.. she told faith that she won't understand cuz she ain't at that age yet..she will understand when she (faith) is at her age.. *Alo...* btw this gal should be at most 22/23? no choice? hmmm won't this put me to a frenzy now? but why settle for kosong teo chew muay when you can endulge in abalone porridge? * i would prefer the abalone porridge... live examples of those who regret choosing the teo chew muay at the slightest complain of hunger... porridge.. *craving for the crystal jade porridge now..* porridge in mind? i think i mught have a certain craving now... i guess i'm not much of a food gourmet.. as long as it fall within my broad limits of tolerance (which is not that difficult to meet.. but not really..).. i can slowly grow to adapt and like it..
porridge parable? hmmm.. crab porridge? haha...
not making sense?
nevermind...
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