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Friday 27 February 2009

almost a nightmare...

Yesterday, I almost did not make it to cg or to meet my ex-cg members who were supposed to be there for "make-up".. it was a manic workday... cuz gotta rush out an email to a client by hook/ crook cuz my sm deemed that it was uber urgent. However, that did not materialise as my gm went off without even looking @ the case.. henceforth.. need not stay till the approval given.. Yet by then, it was already 7pm. 

Having to meet the ex-members meant another thing which I've tried to avoid for a really long time... henceforth my twitter status last evening was "...hope that I would not meet who I don't wish to see... "  Due to some weird twist of events, it did not materalise. And another passing thought that came through my mind (which i randomly told Janet when she was commenting on the missing ones) did really happen ... nah, me =X= prophetess.. 

On happier notes... i was glad to meet up with the goh sisters and estelle... :) miss the spunky june. :) frankly, nothing much that I missed from the old grp except these three and corinth. :) and indeed, i'm indeed happy to be in current 'family' now.. :)

Wednesday 25 February 2009

Rainbow.... & Mt Faber...

Haven't seen one for a long time... yet while embarking on my virgin attempt to run up & round Mt Faber (a not very tall hill in Singapore), saw the huge rainbow somewhere across the skyline from the Mt Faber area to ...  But I did not have my mobile with me.. henceforth did not have the luxury to capture that moment...

I like rainbows.. reminds me of His covenent...

And yep, i did manage to complete the uphill run up the mount and down and back to habourfront.. It seemed like a long journey (which I managed to strained my left calf muscle - cuz I did not warm up (bad move!) - midway uphill) and we (i.e. a few of my colleagues) took about an hour to complete the route.... and it was only like 5.6km? oh well.. still it feels good to destress via running...

Frankly, I'm not that particularly fond of running... (* i prefer walking...*) but it helps to keep the excess mass in check..:)

running out of time... gotta create a card... let me ransack my paper collection for ideas.... 

Monday 23 February 2009

stressed

Stressed.. the question popped up again.. now it's even like.. i sign u up.. Tsktsk.. Can wait? This time worse.. it's steven plus charlene.. Stressed... I would love to - but need to resolve this before i can go ... realistically, after counting the sums.. which i don't need the calculator. it's so not gonna happen this year. 2010 can?

Puzzled - part II

I am so NOT going to reply to that thread on my status.. I tried to be friendly hence forth replied to the first comment. Just logged on to facebook, saw the following comments.. eh.. it's a wee bit weird. * plus i'm not interested..* Imagine you don't really know a person and that person actually keen to join u in an activity??

Saturday 21 February 2009

Puzzled...

I think I'm not used to over-friendliness.. felt kinda weird to receive "zao an ni hao" from a person that I'd barely talked to (I think at most 10 words.) when he logs on and happen to see me online or when my msn status is visible..

Was surprised to see a comment on my facebook status as so why i did not ask him along. Eh??? perhaps, just trying to be friendly... Though I won't attempt such a feat unless I'm well acquainted with him/her or haha fond of him (this does not apply to any "her"s - doh, i'm happy but not gay!!)

Back to finishing that draft reply/email to my biz unit. and I'm not supposed to be working today... *drats* but then came to my office on my own accord... felt super recharged after the am jog from office to psa and back (cuz found a colleague who shared the same new year resol as me.. run a half-marathon this year.. so we are starting on short road runs to prepare.. plus for her, she wanna get back in her slender figure pre-pregnancy !)

Target to leave office by 12noon (latest!)

Thursday 19 February 2009

The next generation...

Did not atttend choir prac this week.. Cuz cgl texted to attend the combined meeting instead. I was eh.. surprised. (me title-less in current cg .. haha. but i don't need the title to do things though... )

Was apprehensive in attending that in the first place.. cuz not too sure if the old wounds have healed. Didn't want to risk bleeding again. Alright the adverse did not happen. :) *glad*

Anyway, met a couple of choir gals who were too in choir and were deliberating to attend the combined meeting or attend practice.. Told them : " Not everyone can be here.. it's up to you to choose!"

 Pastor Tan shared what was closed to his heart. The next generation.

Interestingly how  he linked the gist of message behind "An Inconvenient Truth" to the mission behind Citycare. [Disgress: Was sort :( when I didn't get to catch that a year back cuz my coy giving free tix for the screening @ gv vivo - cuz my coy quite supportive of environmental issues! ).

No doubt the movie/documentary was about global warming and the impact of it if we choose to disregard it in view of the selfish-self-promoting/ self-benefiting profit motive - it will have an adverse impact on the lives of our next generation and yep, us if we are still alive and kicking..; there draws a parallel with the society at large too. Our actions will have an impact on the next generation, though you might think, you are only one person, but hey on a collective basis (of all the individuals)- the impact can be great!

I agree that mankind tends to be more self-consuming.. as if what's works best for me, i'll do it.  There is a chinese saying "自扫门前雪".  Yeap, that is the trend of attitude of that mankind seemed to adopt. (As in, what's in for me?) Indeed, I'm too flesh and flood and i don't deny the fact that given a choice (that will not result in adversity to others, I'll too like to do things that benefit myself too..) But to do it at the expense of others, it's just not me.. (unless he/she triggered the "danger" button - so far.. no activation yet.. phew!)

Anyway, i advocate the green movement. I love bringing down bottles to the recycling bin, using my own shopping bags (cuz (a) the plastic bag is unnecessary, (b) it does not look glam (c) it adds clutter!) during grocery shopping with mom. (haha me not aunty one.. dun shop for grocery, but have inculcate the use your own bag mantra to my mom! haha!)

And I really admire Al Gore's passion towards the cause of global warming. :)

should i... or should i not....

I wonder if the front & right "GO" on cab on tuesday nite was just a causal-by-the way typesy of "go" or the word from Him "GO!!"

Tsk tsk.. it's definitely something I would want to do - see left hand column. (else, why do i even bother to list it out?? ) Sigh, don't want to go due to pressure from others..  or the excuse that "gotta send one to go every year." I'm a scribe and love to take notes.. haha (dun believe, ask ivory.. hehe..)

Not that I keep saying next year.. but sigh, i contribute more injections to the economy than to the bank account. Henceforth... this year.. not possible. Let me reverse that situation, save more, inject less.  (aT least i must have surviving funds rite???)

Yah, this dragged from 2005 till now le. Tsk tsk tsk. Haiz.

Tuesday 17 February 2009

It aint' that far afterall..

Since the fortnightly session was called off.. I get to join my colleagues for a jog! Initially, we thought of just running to Keppel Island and back.. (cuz one of my colleague, yp,  ain't used to running..) Made a casual sugggestion just before the turn into Keppel Bay Drive to try running to PSA instead.. To my surprise, the other 2 gals were game for the idea, hence change of route.. Frankly it wasn't too far.. and at a very comfy pace.. Did a check (wasn't wearing my nike+ enable shoes, so couldn't get the distance @ real time.. ) Figured out should be less than than 5km since we came back & fro in 35-40 min @ easy pace.. (my usual comfy timing is abt 5km in 32min) Indeed.. it was about 4.2Km. Still have the energy for another round but think it might be a bit too much for the gals.. henceforth... adjorned home after the run..

At this rate, I seriously think that it might be possible to hit 21km by June. Yay!

Moral of story... Things aren't as difficult as it seemed.. Cuz yp was lamenting that she definitely could not finish the run (cuz her stamina ain't that great.) BUT she completed the run without walking throughout! hence.. dun let your mind determine the outcome prior to even trying!!

Perhaps I should attempt 21km this sat am @ the beach? think the loyang road might be a bit too ulu for me..

Here's the link to the route run this evening..

Twitter/Facebook

For a moment, I thought it was cool that Pastor Kong is listed as one of my friend in facebook (I was deliberating if that's a real account or an account being managed by his staff). I was pleasantly surprised that he accepted my friend request within minutes (thanks to nicole's suggestion lo..else, won't even know that pastor is on facebook!)

Then for the fun of it, since it was announced on the TV announcement that Pastor Kong is now on Twitter.. Decided to create an account and "follow" his updates... I was very surprised that he actually choose to follow my updates too..  personal touch indeed! :)

Then.. for a moment.. fear strike.. what if i emo and pastor (and haha my cgl too -since he oso follows my twitter... ) read about it.. Then dismissed that thought.. cuz afterall I do think before i type and publish.. and ya, don't think I've anything to hide..

Monday 16 February 2009

Fisherman's Friend

Throat was bad again this morning.. Bought another packet of Fisherman's friend.(The extra strong flavour which i don't like. But medicine being medicine, ought not be taken in excessive quantity!)

The self-medicate over-the-counter-relief for burning throat:
Fisherman's friend

Did a harmless google on "Fisherman's Friend". Didn't realised even for simple day-to-day life items like lozenges, there is a history to its creation. Here's what I found on wikipedia:

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Fisherman's Friend are strong menthol lozenges produced in Fleetwood, Lancashire, England.
Fisherman's Friend were originally developed by a young pharmacist named James Lofthouse in 1865 to relieve various respiratory problems suffered by fishermen working in the extreme conditions of the Icelandic deep-sea fishing grounds. Originally developed as an extremely strong liquid remedy containing menthol and eucalyptus oil, Lofthouse made this liquid into small lozenges which were easier to transport and to administer. According to the manufacturer, the fishermen soon began to refer to the lozenges as their "friends", hence the name. The lozenges exist in their current form relatively unchanged since their creation. The lozenges still come in their famous paper packets, although these are now foil-lined and sometimes packaged inside a cardboard carton. 
The official website

Sad to find that some of the more yummy flavours are available in certain countries, for example the yummy Blackcurrant flavour.. sad. :(

the top 5 needs...

Point 2 & 3 of male/female's  top 5 needs are revealed during this weekend service. Seriously I wonder if I'm more m than f cuz i concur to the male's top 3 as well.. haha..

But nope, I'm stil pretty much female.. :)

the 14th day of February...

Silly thought that came to mind.. Since typically the full term of pregnancy approximates to 9 months.. I may be created on the 14th of February a couple of decades + ago. [I arrived on earth on 14 November !] My memory recalls that that I'm born pre-maturely.. hence, hmm that couldn't be the case.. haha!

Nope, no Hot date on the 14th. But was in lovely company of yes, my colleagues in the morning.. (cuz it was my working weekend..), my hunky pt in the afternoon (my weekly sat appointment).. met mer for dinner/cuppa before heading down to chinaone with joshua and a couple of others. Hmm my fault for resulting in some not so happy situations cuz of the power of assumption of others.. Oh well, we can't assume all process thoughts the same way.. (though on hindsight, i realised why some are not invited.. ) Nonetheless... like the band @ chinaone.. Oh well, I'm not a big fan of beer (except root beer.. which is now a bane..) but it made things easier to go with the flow to just order what the others ordered.. oh well.. hmm I guess the other 3 peeps were happier with chatting (Tsk.. chatting in a noisy club?? T_T" oh well, they might have other agendas in mind.. ) Am not a dancy person..hence no groove or hump for me..but woot hoot .. happy to hear croon of  my era like the woo hoo hit - blur's Song 2 and blink182's all the small things..  haha, i prefer the alternative typesy music .. and the occasional rock (bon jovi , U2?) And nope, i ain't a katang.. I converse much more fluently in Mandarin than English.. Probably the "cheena" traits run in the family - my bro is darn power in his command of Chinese... he writes in Chinese for a living.. woo hoo.. and perhaps to be different from my bro.. i grew up listening to perfect 10 - currenly 987fm instead of 933 .. silly rite? but if not for that, perhaps, I'll be uber cheena now.. haha..

Anyway, after 10+ minutes of bump & grind (not me but the group of crazy party gals behind me..oo reminded me of R Kelly's song of the same title.. ), i wonder why some peeps found this to be a stress reliever by raving and waving their hands in the air (ma-chiam a bit like wat we chc-ers do during the uber high praise songs) @ the fave party hits (such as aha's take on me..) Perhaps it gotta do with expending energy? Same kick that one gets after a great workout? Hmmm, fun as it maybe.. or perhaps it may be a bit more different if i'm with my gal pals? but then again, contrary to some's belief .. saya ain't chiongster.. :) Hmph.. that makes wanna wake up early tmw am to go for my am jog again. (not that confident to run along the road at nite - prolly if I'm male, or with company, i dun mind a midnite jog..  haha but who can i jio to jog in the middle of nite at pasir ris.. haha can only think of e. haha. bad idea.. think he'll be miles ahead... :(

Hmmm not too sure if the monday session is on.. Else, will join a couple of my colleagues for jog ard keppel island.. :) oh yeah, i think I caught the running bug.. kinda good. at least make good my investment in the recent pair of adidas i bought. :) Though the pace is kinda slow (cuz some were new to jogging...) but get chance to bond with them.. :) Though haha it would be even better if we can chill @ Prive or tcc (yay, finally received my tcc card last Fri!) after the jog .. >.<

 
the indulgence dark orange choc from e! 
Like the orange bits within

 
The very empty Starbucks @ Raffles City Shopping Center.
SUmmer says cheers!
me & my Venti non-fat latte! 

Friday 13 February 2009

the monday to thursday...

Was browsing thru' imeem.... Found some old old hits that i love... :) and perhaps that depicts the moment.. :)

Lack of sleep.. Did managed to pry myself out of bed for the past few mornings... Woke up in shock @ 6am on monday.. Waited eternity for cab ard 620 but found none in vain. Decided to hit the gym for work a mini -sweat (cuz I didn't have my make-up pouch with me (oh my gosh!).. can't afford to shower off the foundation, cuz still need to work..)

Went to the evening prayer meeting instead.. He spoke.. I wonder when... tsktsk... my flesh declared it's not gonna be 2009.. alas.. the struggle that I always face this time of the year... before the closing date..  Anyway, was not thrilled by not able to run that much in the am.. (did only like 2 km on the cross-training machine).. walked from The Riverwalk along boat quay to the gym @ raffles place... :) and think it's faster than to take the train down.. just a 10min leisure walk.. :) but it was a WINDY nite.. nearly did a marilyn monroe while walking past.. [But the marilyn monroe thingy did came to pass while i was on my way home. While I was about to enter the raffles place mrt entrance/exit to head down the escalator.. Thank goodness no one was there.. *blush*]

bumped into e @ the lift lobby. :) then saw someone who resembled "st james" walking on the treadmill infront of me..probably it should be him cuz he glanced back at the crowd (cuz he was tucked in this corner.. but kinda weird to glance back to check the crowd when you are working out... ) so he should see me.. but surprised to see him cuz thought he should be in the atas club like fitness first. 

Happily made it to tues & wed am pm via smrt trains.. Same tugging impression on wed am.. kinda paiseh to be in teary state when pastor asked us to turn to your neighbour and say something.. Haiz. (I think I'm very fleshly...) Hated the choice of my mng pants yesterday.. they were dragging along the ground cuz they were hanging.. yups too loose.. Bought them before my new found passion in killing the fats.. Wore them only twice after length alternation... :( (which explains why i usually refrained from wearing pants to work..) should i forsee losing an inch off the waistline.. i would get it one size smaller ..:(

Due to the lack of sleep , was uber crappy on wed...  wrote an uber long email (imagine i can crap while sending boring things like foodlog.. & a seven to eight paragraph reply which could be condensed to a simple yes or no..." to e. uber cranky. was surprised that haha he considered me as one of his closer clients.. perhaps cuz our acquaintance dated all the way back 4 years plus.. haha.. :)

Almost lost my cool whilst cuz of the miscom btw sum & i.   sorry gal.. if i sounded pissed.. we were tasked to buy the refreshments but gotta reach kembagan within an hour after the pm ended.. and limited finger-food choices @ Central.. oh well.. at least things still work out fine and yup. they did enjoy the food.. :) * thank goodness.*

WAs aghast to find my prayer book wet & the chops smudged.. and my day 1 chop was corroded..(Cuz apparently, I didn't secure the bottle cap properly... Thank God when it dried up.. there's still a faint mark of the Day 1 choppe. (haha!)

Caught the Interview with by Pastor Kong with New Life Church for the 2nd time during cg. Creativity... sigh.. roused my desire again (to sca!)... and seeing the ntu (not the sg ntu la) campus in the video reminded me of my 1st mission trip to taipei.. (though i admit it was fun fun as well as working... ) Down in my goal card this year.. sign up for a "real" mission trip this year.. real meaning the less leisure mostly "work" typesy.. :)

And i got overdosed on fisherman's friend cuz my throat burns when i swallowed.. and drank like a camel.. MUSt be the cashew nuts i ate last evening. Drats.Finished the pack on strong mints but to no avail. Getting the Xtra strong ones later. (And fact is that i spit out the first one that I ever tried.. Memorable experience in Sec 1. Still remember it was from Sandi.. haha.. i remenber the weirdest stuff at times.. )

Thursday 12 February 2009

Not thrilled....

I'm not that thrilled to be titled actually.

I'm not that thrilled really.


I wonder why my name is being mentioned in the ic meeting? Weird. Cuz saw justin after pm on wed am. He corrected how he usually addressed me. Mentioned that he was corrected on the pronouciation of my name during the ic meeting. Tsk, why talk about me? Cuz I was 5 minutes late last Sunday?! (the suay time i was late cuz I waited 20 minutes for cab @ Jurong Point. )

Was chatting with eileen on the msn. sigh.. she asked me about my aspirations in choir.. (I guess I shocked her by telling her of my sucky bonus. Gave her a brief history of events in 2008 that led to that. Guessed what, she felt something was amiss but she thought it was a wrong thot. haha.. ) Frankly, i don't mind doing things without a title..(else, why am i doing things that I'm doing?) At times, i find the leaders/helpers kinda cliquish and i don't blame them. cuz they spent huge amount of them together..natural to be closer...

That being said, i don't aspire to be part of cliques. Cliques excludes.. not  includes.. It may not be a conscious thing, but when you talk about private jokes among a group and the group make no head or tails what is going on, think from the point of view of the "excluded" ones. Family or merely in the same group?  I know, you ought spend more time with your leaders to catch from them.. I know that theory.

Yep, spiritual walk is more than serving in ministry.. or like a rat-race., to climb up the level in leadership.  Yet, the sad thing about mankind, they usually give more respect to title more than the person itself.

As for whether or not, I don't know... see how He leads ba..

Monday 9 February 2009

The Curious Case...

Caught the Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons last Saturday with some of my cg members. (Was surprised to learn that some of them found it draggy & couldn't wait for it to end..!)Like the clever storyline.  I admit.. one of the main compelling reasons why I wanted to catch the show was : brad pitt.. [one of my personal faves - think I'd seldom miss his movies.. :)  another actor that I like - will smith.. :) since his goofy days of fresh prince.. ops.. that reveals how aged I am.. but i was still in primary sch when i caught that.. :)]

There are several scenes that I like.. like how Mr Daws would suddenly tell Benjy on how he was struck by lightning seven times.. the part whereby how Benjamin was imagining how Daisy could have avoided being struck by the car after her dance practice...  and many more.. :)

Somehow I feel that I'm like Benjamin.. i seemed to look younger nowadays.. compared to a few years back.. Thank goodness for the fats.. haha else, would be having those fine lines already... :) haha... yeah.. :) Acting cute halt the aging process?  perhaps.. :)  Note: acting cute = x = being naive.. :)

But it's actually kinda scary to be degenerate in the level of thoughts processing as days passes.. Losing memories that you have acquired over the years...  but i don't mind looking more youthful day after day.. :)

A tagline from the movie.. "..Life isn't measured in minutes, but in moments .."

Saturday 7 February 2009

Day of catching up.. & more

Had a great time earlier.. :) Catching up with two of ex-cg members.. and trying to get to know two of my new cg-members..

Visited Joyce @ her place with Corinth.. Great fellowship & catching up.. :) i missed the times chatting with them... and the fun times we have in cg. Both of them have moved on to another stage in life.. I'm marching on spot. Soon soon... I will get moving...

Due to the lengthy journey (and under-estimation of the journey time from cck to orchard, )was kinda late in meeting Imelda & Summer. Went to Indochine wisma - the sanctuary.. Great music by the resident band - cats in cradle.. but what I take away is the opportunity to interact with the lovely gals.. and it was really good bonding.. :) Like minds interact... Glad that alcohol has no effects on me.. :) but I only have one cocktail though.. lovely name.. sex on the beach.. haha nah, i won't have the guts to do that.. just the name of the drink..like it cuz of the cranberry.. Lame as it sounds, summer's drink was safe sex on the beach.. haha safe cuz was a mocktail.. HAHA

Cg meeting on thurs was once again not the norm.. once again, i 'escaped' taking testimony.. I guessed that that session was a session for some of the members to lash it out.. But seriously, I thank God for the wisdom to be able to see where their grievances stamp from AND yet, totally understand why we are still doing what we are doing.. There's no perfect/catch all solution, but there should be a balance ...

I don't deny the fact that all of us have different needs .. but there should be a give and take.. AND seriously, if every cgm is purely a meeting the needs sessions, won't it be JUST another social gathering.. @ whatever venue..  it's willl be an art to incorporate spiritual into the natural.. yet I feel that weekly pure sharing/fellowship session may not be the answer... missing the spiritual aspects of it all, what difference does it make from another social gathering?? Essence... Spiritual aspect...  And it takes more then two hours of weekly meeting up to get to know someone better.. It's really going the extra mile, taking interest to get to know... It's not the time/venue/setting/method.. it's our mindset.

I am not being religious, and I certainly don't think I've arrived and know it all. Iron sharpens iron. Nope, not just seeking for more info, more sermons, but I guess it's a quality and not quantity. Yet I guess what's evident now is the lack of meaningful, in-depth relationship.. but there again, there is a need for in-depth word which the weekly mass message may not address (cuz not all can comprehend...) And true that being in church for quite sometime will mean that you might have heard some of the sermons before BUT we are all at different stages in life- spiritually & physically. And there are things that we might not understand a few years ago that we finally come to the revelation. Else, you will only need to read the Bible once thru and c'est tout?

or perhaps, I'm seeking for something more... not the quantity, but the quality... I seriously don't believe that the spiritual walk is static and certainly not a solo journey ...

I don't deny the fact that we have to adapt /change with time.. but there are things that we can't compromise on.. but there are things that we can do in excess but then again, not all are willing to commit.. Sigh.. no perfect solution... cuz the world , fallen, ain't perfect..