hmmm saw adrian @ foyer 3 this afternoon... tsk.. yes.. he posed me answer the question i would want to avoid... AM i still in choir? He used an interesting analogy... 一刀要见血 .translate: Why haven't I make a clean cut.. a clean choice... (he never fails to remind me that I've YET articulate my desire/calling). Yes.. THe second time this week... A sign??
Am I avoiding this again... had been dragging fOr at least two weeks... it's not that I've not the direction... yet...it's something that I'm not really ready and want to let go.. the friends.. something i like... and yes.. something i'm getting used to... yes.. I want to be part of the team to perform "brighter day".. (yeah, it's gonna be a "wOw" item..... Yet.. don't think that will come to pass.. )
it's a season of letting go.. and adapting.. and assuming new responsiblities... Am i willing to let go? In one aspect of me.. I'd already did... and that took tWo years.. Am i going to take that long tO make up my mind again... but if so...will i miss the kairOs time?
Obedience is the best answer ...
Fri afternoon, received an sms from bro alvin.. Was rather surprised to see that he wants me to help cover him in the subzone attendence in the event that he's away.. i was really surprised... cuz (a) why me? (b) I don't have the red tag ..
This evening... during service... while pastor was sharing on some of the history of our church... God just reminded me... from how He has called me... and all that's happening.. is not a coincidence... is all in accordance to His blueprint for me...
"Ordinary my voice may be, let many lives be impacted when i sing.. " translate. this is not gOnna take place on stage.. but in another setting... truly fully comprehend this now... Yes, my voice is sad to say... ORDINARY (and this has to be illustrated in the plain trUth... in frOnt of the "organising committee" after the debrief... [ya, u have sorta prick the wound that has healed over past couple of days.. sOmetimes... I just wonder... if my voice quality is really that bad .. how did i make it pass the choir auditions ( in sch for the syf competitions.. and in church for ministry)? ]
perhaps.. am in the oversensitive mode again... OR.. i just need an audience to listen to this.. Ya.. was talking to faith this afternoon... sad to see one of my palie in chOir being attached to this gUy who is ah.. not MOG.. and ya.. as a result.. more distant to everyone... hmm.. she told faith that she won't understand cuz she ain't at that age yet..she will understand when she (faith) is at her age.. *Alo...* btw this gal should be at most 22/23? no choice? hmmm won't this put me to a frenzy now? but why settle for kosong teo chew muay when you can endulge in abalone porridge? * i would prefer the abalone porridge... live examples of those who regret choosing the teo chew muay at the slightest complain of hunger... porridge.. *craving for the crystal jade porridge now..* porridge in mind? i think i mught have a certain craving now... i guess i'm not much of a food gourmet.. as long as it fall within my broad limits of tolerance (which is not that difficult to meet.. but not really..).. i can slowly grow to adapt and like it..
porridge parable? hmmm.. crab porridge? haha...
not making sense?
nevermind...
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