iSay...

I realised ... there is no guarantee in "forever" for things which are man-made.  Events/ things along the way do make me scoff at the term "bff". Forever? I should say the state of "forever" in that phase in life.

Things change along the way, perhaps the perceptions toward certain issues, the encounters shared, the priorties in life.  Or simply, the exclusion of involvement will inevitably lead to the detoriation of state of relationship. Or.. face it, it is 50-50 possibility - either you grow apart or grow closer.

Recently, while I was packing my stuff, I came across this picture... There were four of us in it.. (taken years ago.. think was the first emerge.) I realised, the relationship between me and the other three persons in the picture has evolved over the years and from strangers to friends to close friends to either just friends/or even strangers.

Nope, I've grown pass the stage of "bitterness" on the strain. I guessed, the unexplained circumstances, the things left unsaid, unexplained led to the strain..  Though, at one point in time, I thought the term "bff" will somehow apply, there was time whereby misunderstanding occured and it was sorta cleared up but somehow this time round.. it's really ruined.

I like the turkey way of reacting to situations that are threatening.. I won't deny that fact that I was disillusioned by the reality of matters, how things turn out. I can't stimulate emotions that my sensory nerves fail to respond to when detected your presence...  So far, the turkey response works, but when all of the above (maybe 50%) come together... as far as the brain is concerned, take cover.  Guess all this boiled down to historial events that are ironed out.

I know I can't play hide & seek indefinitely... Not too sure if eventually come the day that the past nooks and twists gotta be straightened face to face. All I can say, (alright, different things to different parties), appreciate the comaraderie during that moment in time, the fond moments we shared. Pleasant memories I wish to keep, the not so pleasant to be erased.

Nope, not that I'll that disillusioned with the human race and become a hermit. Just the contrary, it's not possible to live like a hermit. Just glad that at every phase of life, I've friends (true ones) that bring me back to reality, who are patient with the mule streak in me, I've leaders that believed in me, and friends that have always been there. And new/old friends that I've grown to know better...

thanks to peeps who have been listening to my 牢骚s recently - like imel (i enjoy the chats!!), asteric (who keeps me entertained during my dayJob while destressing by crappin/talking sense), and the invisible audience reading this blog..

time to get my Manasseh.