Emotionally locked up?

verbally... i guessed there's prolly one on earth that hears the most rambles from me..

I think I find it difficult at times to pour out audibly compared to the written form .. hence i blogged.. Yet.. it just revealed what I oughta do...

On wed.. someone asked me how i was doing... really i wanted to share and pour... yet it was not an appropriate time (just aft lunch hour) and yes.. I don't want to eat up too much of his time... ya.. I know he could sense that I wasn't in tip top condition.. yet.. i guessed he wanted me to confide rather than pry...

last nite and tonight .. I just felt that the question was sorta directed at me? or am i over sensitive... ? Am learning to don the color "clear". Trust is not built overnight though... yet, at times.. the question is.. "who want to listen?"

Emotional.. definitely not bottled up person.. else.. haha.. i won't be blogging extensively.. Funny why i find it easier for the whole wide world to read abt me.. my rantings.. than to confide in a real tangible person and ya.. I guessed ya.. pride.. not that easy to get inside... i need to overcome that...

yes.. it has been a tired journey.. i knew I oughta cut away one.. yet.. the one I know I oughta cut away is the one that I really enjoy.. and I still believe that I could make it one day... YET... the immediate task on hand.. in my own ability and make-up.. I know I couldn't.. IT's really not me.. YET.. my Creator thinks I could..

I really don't know what lies ahead.. Yet.. I will press on and trust..

going to office tmw.. ya.. I'm going to PSA (hahe not the port.. but..) on 11 Sept... it's exciting time... 911...

I gotta cease procrastinating... and let my family know that i'll cease serving the nation directly sooon.. yet.. I still believe that tax is necessary.. but now.. I'm just on the giver side of the fence..

and yes.. I will first write an email to explain my "ok" reply on wed.. and then ceased just replying "OK"..

o... Sept.. 2 cards to be made.. :)