Ponder.. i Ponder...

Why would some just post pictures on the web for no particular reason? I mean, if the photos do flatter you.. by all means.. but if the pictures do disservice to the subject, hey spare a thought for others alrite?

Cuz, was rather shocked to see the notifications in facebook that a contact of mine recently added some random pictures taken over different periods (over the years). Man, some of the pictures showed not so glorious moments of some.. which also brought to mind some rather (distasteful) "arty" pictures found in albums of some contacts. Alright, beauty lies in the eye of the beholder.. I guessed that was the image that they wanna portray to those curious eyes who wanna know more about them..

Is this act typical of a narcissist?
Am i guilty of that? I hope not.. Alright to a certain extent, perhaps.. (else why i bother to post on the www?) Or rather.. it's more a way to share my thoughts to whoever reading... HAHA.. perhaps, will serve as a memoirs should i be called Home suddenly..(gee morbid thought! but nah, won't go before my time though...) haha..

Pictures wise.. I won't be that silly to just post online... Any man on the street would certainly prefer to see himself in GOOD light rather than bad.. hmmm well, God made each of us differently .. so some are more unique than others... for me.. I won't.. HAHA..

e just changed his contact pic to a homer-lookalike.. HAha actually it does resembles him.. LOL.. I think I'll get clobbered if i tell that straight into his face..

Draw the line... Shall refrain "suaning" (the innocent bickering can be...).. that's a dangerous ground to tread upon... if only...

*faint*

Literally.. & metaphorically..

the metaphoric "faint"
Those who have ears, let them hear.. I guess some people just lack the basic courtesy or respect for others.. Two incidents that "inspired" this post ..

Firstly, the watered-down rebuke to the s4 peeps - seriously, the number of peeps strolling in & out of service is on the rise... (which I totally agreed to!!)

Then after service, pastor Ck met up with all om & above members - a further elaboration of the lack of discipline portrayed (Kudos to that); the art (or rather, the lack of which) of dressing..  And while pastor was addressing us, I was totally appalled at the actions of one sister. I know that it has been a long day .. and probably the digestive system was appealing for food to be inputted into your system, but would you be  eating or chomping away while perhaps, a VVIP like, MM Lee or your CEO, is giving a speech? ( I think his security guards will get you out at the first instant?) Especially if you are standing right in front of the speaker and dressed rather prominently? Yet, this prettily-adorned gal was savouring away at her snicker bar (or some chocolate bar) - while pastor CK was talking.. (*faint*). And nope, it was not eating discreetly - BUT happily munching away (as if you were watching a movie in the theatre?) And yep, this lasted for about a few minutes.. i.e. she savoured the whole chocolate bar while pastor was talking... and i guesssed she was thirsty after that whole bar of choc went down her throat, she took out her bottle of water and drank.. Man, this was after Pastor Kong addressed on the lack of discipline and while pastor CK was re-addressing this issue.. And mind you, she ain't a newbie (think she should be MM?) wo (newbie in the zone though).. I was totally disgusted at this.. But i guessed, she think it's totally alright to do that.. else she won't be doing it in FULL view of pastor.. (perhaps that was what caught pastor's attention, cuz she was singled out as an example of a "well-dressed" individual towards the end.. ). Sigh, if I was close enough to her.. I would definitely ask her to consume that bar after that wo.. (Yup, I know this person personally..but nah, not in my cg! Even the peeps in my cg was shocked by her actions!) Sigh, can't you wait for a couple of minutes? Is that how you treat the leader that God has placed over your life. I'm not being legalistic, just thought that it's a form of basic courtesy & form of respect towards others.. irrespective to whoever is talking, you should give the person attention.. And certainly you should honour the leaders that God has placed over your life..

the literal "faint"
Perhaps it was due to the lack of blood... haha.. I saw glittery stars on my way home.. .Perhaps that was why my palms were cold.. Lights dimmed (internally) and stars glittering while i was waiting for an empty cubicle in the ladies @ Eunos mrt (cuz by that time I could not withstand the churning pains within.. and alighted at Eunos). fortunately, it was a rather clean toilet... Guessed blood flow resumed back to my head after lowering my head for a while.. Nah, I'm not anaemic but prolly it was after 8 hours since brekfast before the ban-mien gan i ate and that it was the heavy flow day.. Made it back home safely in a cab after clearing the stars in my head..

Caught the F1 race on TV after zzzz for half an hour.. (felt much better after that nap).. Was wowed by the race wo.. :) maybe I may want to catch the race live next year?

Elmo ..

Was supposed to be shopping with mandy this sat noon after my gym session BUT cuz has long postponed meeting up with dear estelle for so long, I gotta take a raincheck on that (hope she ain't offended.. cuz forgot to tell her until she texted me this morning.. so sorry gal..

but was glad to meet up with estelle.. :)

It was a mini-feast for moi.. ( worry abt the foodlog later.. ops! sorry e that i was 'bad' despite promising not to.. tsktsk.. ) yummy shepherd pie @ coffeeclub (and the banana butterscotch latte was a tad too sweet but it was not too bad..).. Adjourned to riverisland after the late lunch...

River island was having sale.. was :( that the white skirt that I bought a month ago was slashed by $40.. (Oh well.. still at least I got a new piece.. and my size.. Speaking of skirt.. I think the fox denim skirt I was wearing today had to be binned.. Cuz it was worn without a belt today and it was too loose for me that by the end of the day.. I've to hold it up with my hand else, it will slip down my  hips.. )

And the sound of the F1 trial race was very audible even when we were @ the entrance of raffles city.. which prompted us to get onto the road.. and "hear" the race... Caught a glimpse of the race cars zooming by through the slit in btw the boards put up.. (alrite, not a glimpse, but a flash...)

And had yummy dinner @ NYDC.. Spotted elmo & cookie monster having dinner by themselves.. (Ops.should have snap a pic of that.. ) Was rather "envious" of the group of 6 that got to dine with elmo & cookie.. but I get to rescue elmo after he was "abandoned" by this toddler.. (when she left the restaurant.. YAY!)..

Estelle with her "pigs will fly"

me & "destiny child" (yummy baked rice..)

Yummilicous "band-aid" mudpie!! :)

Elmo: "Help! Someone save me!! (after being shoved aside by this toddler who seemed more interested in her crayons!)"

Elmo in safe hands..( I took him over after the family has left..)

 

 
Elmo: " I'm lifting my hands to worship!!"

Elmo: " Yay! I feel appreciated!

Elmo is happy!!

 

  

EMo Elmo... 

  

Elmo: I wamma go home!!

 
Elmo: "I wanna go shopping!!"

 

Bye Elmo.. I will miss U!!

Ash-Blond.. and other bimbo talk

It was a good day today.. cuz I pampered myself...
1. a new hair color - ash-blond over the dull brown with reddish hue and bleached highlights..
2. yummy hokkaido lychee ice-cream
3. great time spent with kei then mom
4.a new two-tone pink wrap (cuz my $20 esprit credit is expiring end Sept, and cuz it's pink! And it's definitely not as pricey as some items i laid my eyes on while window-shopping @ topshop yesterday.. and the stila counter at Tangs didn't really hue me [the sales-not-so-happening-ladies manning the counter just sit and forced a smile..so I couldn't be bothered to get anything].. no illuminating powder :(.. but I'm a believer in customer-service ...)

Being tired of my fading bleached highlights and the black roots emerging.. and the brown-a-dulling-locks.. I took half a day leave (out of my precious 5.5 days left - out of 3 reserved for the Asian Conference) and did something to revive it..

Met Kei (cuz she loves my previous color and brought her to my stylist past 6+ years) and we emerged happy gals after the colouring.. :) I missed my old colors (which looks great on kei and i love her bob! - but it's too high-maintenance hairdo for me to keep.. unless i rebond my locks again.. and blow-drying it daily.. ) but i loved the shade that she has suggested (it's a new shade (the synethic hair looks grayish-brown.. it was supposed to be ash-blond- that just came in recently.. and she tried it on a customer and the result was good..).. Having great faith in jeanie, i just okay.. Cuz .. i'm alright with anything, except making my hair in curls - big/loose/temporary/permanet/whatever.. it's NO!! I don't like maggie mee.!! Nope, not the waves as well.. except when the length is long and the wave is hereditary in nature.. aka my natural wave.. *lame*

hmm like the end-result. cuz of the highlights was bleached previously.. the ashly tone turns out natural on them.. I like.. at least now.. it's of a healthy hue of brown.. (not the dull brown black - which looks better only if I blow-dry it..)

YAY! I'm finally meeting estelle tmw.. AFTER many postponing!! :) catch-up catch up!!

We are 4.8 million strong nation!!

Was pretty amazed that Singapore's population is just 0.16 mil short of 5mil! Nope, it's not the instant results of the recent baby bonus boost.. but according the yahoo news article (which quoted source from the Govt stats board) "...The number of non—residents grew by 19 per cent, while the resident population went up by a mere one per cent."Gee.. no wonder the need for the baby boosters..
Some other statistics quoted from the article:

• Most come from neighbouring Asian countries.

• There are also more new Permanent Residents (PRs) and citizens. In the first half of this year, 34,800 were granted PRs. That’s up by some 20 per cent from the same period last year.

• Meanwhile, 9,600 were granted citizenship, up by some 30 per cent, compared to the year before.

• And nearly seven in 10 new PRs aged 20 and above had post—secondary qualifications.

Moving forward, the Secretariat said integration would be a key challenge..."

Well said.. integration is certainly a challenge.. else why would the proposed idea of building a dormitory to house the influx (alright, may not be that many but still quite a number...)  of foreign workers in Serangoon Gardens create such big hoo-ha?  Personally, I'm glad I don't stay in the semi-atas area.. Hmm guess staying in public housing (aka hdb flats) since day I was brought out of hospital.. used to the multi-racial typesy environment, though I must say.. the "elite-mentality" do prevails at time.. yeah, I'm quasi-atas at times.. Trying to expand the organ that pumps blood.. (i.e. the heart..)  - yep, i repent..

Power of procrastination..

Yep, there are a lot of things oughta be done... but the P-attitude in me just precedes at times.. (most of the time). Ya, I know I'm wasting time (i.e. wasting life)... 

And yep, I oughta stop "nua-ing". Yep, that's what He told me last nite. (but I couldn't be possibly sharing that with the grp though.. so shared the other more edifying/encouraging one..)

Cuz on tues, after choir prac, while on my long journey home to the pasir of Ris.. jimmy texted me...
"..just now when we pray 4 each other, I saw you as a leader who's a blessing to those who're under your care. Time will come when God raise you up. Trust Him & His promises. what you think is impossible is possible for Him, coz He says, yes, you can!"

Frankly, I was half-hearted when I read that.. Guessed that the problem with us instant-generation.. I want something and i want it now... And hope deferred makes the heart sick...

So.. i was reminded of the Hannah who laughed off what God has told her... tsk tsk.. 

Ivory found her ebony!

Congratulations to dearie iVory!! Yay 50 & seth has an official papa now.. :)

My T70 was roped in to video-cam the whole procedure.. as i was holding it, my voice was captured rather loudly.. haha.. hope that in the event that it's used for the wedding, it will be edited.. Seriously don't know how to edit.. except that I had tried to brighten the very dim lighting...but the view on TV - after adjusting the brightness level on my non-HD non flat screen- old mini -14inch cute lilac sharp Tv- it wasn't too bad...Attempted to do so using the windows movie maker thingy that was in my pc but not of professional standard though.. best to leave it to the professionals.. :)

It was a sweet proposal .(no photos.. cuz i was the video-ing .. charlene took the pix..) Maybe Kai would consider signing up for the talent time showcase in Asian Conference? :)

In the midst of waiting for the two star of the day to appear @ Esplanade roof top. (the sweet couple was enjoying their anniversay dinner and the long slow walk here...) having nothing else to do.. we snapped away at the neon-lights..  Saw part of the F1 track.. guessed if the esplanade roof top is open to public this weekend, it will likely to be crowded with people (who wanna catch a slice of the action without paying a hand and leg for it...)

happie for dearie vOry!! (and so timely that I've dis-engaged myself from the performance/adult choir..else i'll have to be at the prac - but would miss it for vory's sake even if I'd not take myself out... )

wo.. guess this the season to be hitching.. falalala lalala.. as for me, like one of the disney soundtrack goes... someday my prince will come..

the dose of caffeine @ TCC with Kei after the proposal thingy kept me awake till 2plus.. hence no morning jog for me this morning.. Really gotta start the morning rountine again..(phew, good that i didn't sign u for the half-marathon, else left two months oni.. how to train..hehe) - throat was acting weird the whole week.. thank God it didn't went to the "full blown flu mode"..

as for others stuff... perhaps continue another time.. it's that time whereby things peeved me without much effort.. :(

A short note...

yep, it's early in the morning.. and yep, I'm pretty awake still..[ though eyes are tired].. Sigh.. had been spending on cab for past three days.. :( cuz ya, racing against time.. (sat cuz call time was 1pm and I knocked off at 1230; sunday cuz I woke up at 8+ and call time is 10!, a few hours ago cuz I wanna get home asap after the meeting ended and thank God the cab uncle who made an turn from the carpark opp Church stopped diagonally at the yellowbox and let me boarded his cab - else not too sure how long it will take to hail a cab - cuz we were sitting at the creche area and ya, no one to meet ma.. cuz we (the choir peeps) were there cuz ya "creative ministry" members...)

And all i gotta say is... Wow!
Key to growth:: simplicity. and believe..

With regards to dressing: woo at least I'm not that off.. :) and i certainly don't look older than my age.. *yay* (unless i dress slopply loh.. mayb can pass off ). Like one of the BV who said this, we ought to dress in the manner that glorify God. (cuz we are His temple!) And God sees us 24/7, hence we oughta dress up on stage/ off stage.. (couldn't agree less more [thanks to "ast" who pointed out one grave error! i must be half awake while posting.. :o)

And somewhere in the middle of the video - was reminded of the pureness in heart yee once possessed while she was in the same land/ same ground/ same church premise (when she was there and why she was there...). (held back... ) but ya, God sees.. and knows all things.. Hmmm still not all's lost.. :)

Met jo @ tanjong pagar (prior to the "creative" special meeting) and paid 2 mth deposit for lessons to develop the gift that God has placed in me.. (heart pained..Can't afford to go aussie so this is a cheaper alternative... for the moment.. :) ) Should be worthwhile ba. And ya, that guy misspelt my surname [whom oso cannot pronouce my name... :(]  if not, still can get the chance to fellowship with her more.. :)

Sprucing up spirit (in process of) , body (in process of..) , soul (waiting...). :).
Felt previlleged to attend the meeting tonite wo..  time to zzzzzz shall continue when oppty arise!

病句

Was thoroughly drilled on this topic during the Chinese lessons (reckoned it was lower sec)..病句. Yeap, the scores of sentences for us to pick out the incorrect/ inappropriate usage of word or sentence structure. A prevalent error that occur in those who conjure their sentence in mind in English and did a word to word translation. Common eg; to enlisted into NS= is not "进兵", but should be "入伍" & ORD = is obviously not "出兵" (which sounds like 出殡 [translate: funeral possession) but should be "退伍"..

Trigger for this post was a recollection of a monologue (cuz I could catch one party's conversation)  I caught while I was in the train on my way to cg last evening.. A irritating mobile ring tone.. A lady, dorned in officewear, started talking.. Alright.. in a mixture of mandarin spiked with english. The cabin was jammed packed, hence conversations were usually very audible. From the flow of the conversation, I gathered that the lady's friend was asking for her location, cuz she kept repeating this phrase for 3-4 times from outram to tiong bahru (where I alighted) . "我刚刚上train .... 从 Outram..... 我现在在MRT上面!!...."

My initial reaction:Ohmigosh! She's on top of the train?? And the train was travelling underground in the tunnel!!

And she repeated "..我在MRT上面.." for another 2- 3 times (in a short span of 2-3 mintues? Perhaps, poor reception of the mobile line, but didn't she realise her mistake? Or it was perfectly alright and make perfect sense to her?? ) Ohmigosh!! I almost fainted and felt so embarassed for her. But she continue to converse with her friend in , yes, Mandarain (and not English).

Sad, can't even master one language well.. Oh well. if she's more of a "kantang", that horrendous sentence structure can be pardoned.. But then again, grammaritcally, it is incorrect to say she's ontop of the train. A loose translation to describe that you are still travelling in the train would be "我还在MRT里面" though, this would not be uttered by me.. cuz it's sounds broken.. "我还没到, 我还在地铁里哦!" So long winded, but it sounds better! 

Oh man, this reminds me of someone.. who complained that she found it difficult to read Chinese papers, yet she listens to mainly chinese pop, should be engaged more in the Chinese entertainment scene and speak more Mandarin than English. Casually asked if she thought of improving her Chinese... (Matter of fact, both her spoken tongues - mandarin and english - ain't fluent.. though mandarin is definitely the stronger tongue..), since she doesn't think her english needs improvement (doh!) Nope. never crossed her mind.. And mind you, this lass is not even 20! Gee.. our future generation??

残酷的事实: 一般新加坡华籍公民的语文程度就仅如此.  造句时, 中英语混淆, 但中英都不精. 病句连连.

I'm glad to say, at least, I am fluent in one language.. yup the tongue that most yellow-ed skin speices speak - Mandarin! And I am indeed more comfortable in the mothertongue than English.. But I can't pray in Mandarin though.. haha..  perhaps would explore on that - if I'm called to the northeast part of ASia (*given a choice.. i prefer downunder..*) Standard of the universal language (sorta) : I reckon it's not as bad as a typical "lee-lei-loh" s'porean if I make a conscious effort. The O level graded me a B -so not the angmo-kia but at least.. Oh well.. atas me place a perferential on  "English". Society has made it seems that speaking English is more "atas" than Mandarin.But I'm effectively billingual - thanks to the old-school Singapore Education System of SAP schools perhaps? :)

Gee, I thank God for having rather good foundation in mandarin, since Primary School. :) Perhaps, I did benefit from studying in Cheena schools? (I actually kinda like my sec sch song, oh yes, it's in chinese! haha) At least, we were drilled in the grammar/ sentence structure? Or haha.. I've a natural flair for Chinese (cuz that was like the only language- cantonses aside-  I know until K1) ? *faint* It took me ages to type in Chinese.. I can speak fluent Mandarin (and I can douse it with the Taiwanese/ Beijing accent - haha!), but other than that.. I should think I'm rather "kan-tang". Which is good, else think my english would be worse.. hehehe.. *Faint*

Perhaps, when I have kids, I might be like one of the kiasu parents who try their means to get their kids into the "elite" primary sch? (ie. if that long-drawn-multi-stages registration process still exist!)

After googling on " the primary 1 registration...

Yay!! .. I get priority to send my kids to my alma mater regardless where I stay!!! even higher priority to those staying within the 1km radius... cuz of Phase 2A2 .Faint... I'm going too far off.. haha.. :) Or perhaps, they won't be educated here wo.. haha.. Alright.. I'm day-dreaming...

*Faint*.. Perhaps, listening to one of my fave podcast - Grammar Girl - did made me rethink of how badly the grammartical errors can be for Mandarin as well.. Had been listening to it since day 1. Usually, the errors she pointed out are stuff that I do know and don't make.. Phew! :) At least, I passed the QC!

yay!!

A pat on the back.. I completed my 1st 10km run in 68min(inclusive of 1min of warm up- aka walking)!!! ( Inclined the treadmill to stimulate uneven gradient? but e said it will be better for the knee.. haha) in between.. paused 10 - 20 sec every 2k for water.. so safe estimate - should be able to keep at the max of 70 min at worse.. woo.. :)

Almost thought I could not do it cuz it's really endurance run after the 6km mark.. haha.. actually just get the hang of the movement and ya, it's like walking... :) Man, I'm getting addicted to running.. (would love to do that by the beach by it's too late by the time I get home and not safe.. so sticking to the gym... ) maybe the quarter of the fairmount/swissotel mooncake and the 3/4 yoke embedded fuelled the extra energy required (ya, another complimentary box given to the department..) Perhaps, I performed better in the evening? HAHA - nite-owl.. me... cuz it was closed to 8pm by the time i reached the gym.. :) ot-ed a bitsy.. cuz I'd 10 more cases to clear - ideally by mid Oct.. It was a productive day today cuz I off the msn and facebook.. :)

Hmm excited.. might be taking v. class together with fish! :) but extra moolah flowing out... dun think will be taught by the super fierce but pretty one... so there goes my nano for the month of Oct.. Maybe I will get that in Nov.. :) *hint*

yay can sing for JW later cuz pt's postponed to sun late noon (think likely e's 'released from camp' on sat...so was rescheduled ) hmm haven't sang for sat jw for a good period of time.. :) Contemplating to stay for S1 and leave after singing for S4.. haha but cannot la.. :) will decide later... :)

working later.. hence time to log off..  :)

my wAnts

I want the Red/ Pink/ Yellow Or VioletBlue 16G. Plus it will work with my nike+. (Alrite, i still need to get the iPod adapter cuz I owned the watch band version.. well at only an additional $55 ) but this is a good to have..not a MUST have.. Will get it either when iPod died (or capacity of 30G ran out.. which is sooon)  or when moo-lah rolls in! (A&B coming up wo.. )



After playing around @ the sonyE site for a while and a hands-on session with the stimulation.. I like the C902. Alright, cuz it's "quasi"-red (I would have much preferred it to be totally red like my current w660i, but sad to say, I've been mistreating it too much and it is peeling.. :( but i really love its back - the intricate foral designs - the very reason why I had bought it.) But matter of fact, I don't think I need to buy another phone now though except asthestically wise - actually it looked rather rustic though.. - i would like a new one.. But yup, don't think that want would materialize that soon. Need not remind me further or to advocate the iPhone to me.. Seriously, I don't like to carry YET another gadget that's so simliar to people next to me. Unless i heart the person wo. Cuz it'll be likely minimal payment for it (my dear iTwo plan will be one year old @ month end, so yeah, think it should cost less than a hundred cuz likely will trade the K610i - or maybe not.. Cuz I like that too.. Ya, another RED phone..my 1st RED phone!!)

black

Recently (which is less than 24 hours ago), just acquist yet another little black dress from M:phosis (which I intend to wear to a friend's matrimony next sat.). Hmm the tea lady heart my latest addition and complimented me.. :) [oh yeah, couldn't resist the temptation so I'm wearing it today!] Like the black dresses from M:phosis cuz they need no ironing!! The bad thing is that i should have bought S instead of M (the size i used to buy) cuz.. ya, the armholes are too big.. Should have taken size S when the shop assistant re-confirmed the size (Bought another black tank top with a lacy back - :) and a grey jersey vest like thingy..) the tanktop was an S size .. Sigh.. think i may have to re-invent my wardrobe.. HAHA cuz somestuff that used to fit, hangs now.. :( And the pair of jeans that i bought from skin while i was wider.. can't fit too.. sigh.. 心疼 cuz wore it twice.. (cuz it was rather loose when i bought it ) think have to take to alteration when the size stablise. haha...

So bimbotic.. And yep, gotta hold the acquistion trips!

my dear pals..

Met up with the two lovely gals that I've grown attached to in w110.. yet, only corinth was sole "survivor " after hmmm 4 years ba..

Let the pictures do the talking....

 

the dining place...

Seafood Platter for 2 - humongous enough for the three of us with excess..  

 

cheese!!

Corinth was so excited when she spotted the mentos machine.. haha.. she couldn't help but to give it a hug.. Later, we realised that it was actually a game... like the 抓娃娃机. aka you might not even get mentos despite feeding it withb a dollar coin (that's the cost of one go @ the machine...)

After sending Joyce off, we walked to cityhall and decided to chill out a bitsy more @ the starbucks.. :) missed the time that we chitchat wo.. :)  while sitting in a corner of the not very occupied cafe.. spotted two familiar faces who popped by for a cuppa - my  mutli-parts-churning 偶像 & the other choir guy who just graduated from sot.. hmmm yep, s'pore is rather small.. seemed so easy to bump into fellow chc-er. :)

And I <3 this grey miffy that I've spotted in the かゎぃぃ shop @ level 3 of ps. Woo, they even have a miffy catalogue!! Resued her and another cutie miffy in beach gear.... Went home and realised that grey miffy has a twin sister at home - exactly the same that my bro bought for me from HK a few months back.. Hence, using the older one as my mobile charm.. :) 

little joy

Juvenile, oh juvenile..
yet that brings me a smile..
just few short words,
yet they brighten my world.
Juvenile, oh juvenile.

the trimming...

In the midst of the adult choir prac last evening.. I felt this prompting.. ya, to streamline and focus wo.. Afterall, am supposed to be resting and not burning out wo.. And having to attend 2 different pracs @ JW is not the exact idea of "resting". And I'm rather peeved by the bo-chup attitude of some ladies (i presumed they were new additions to the grp since I didn't see them at the prac for the tcc performance. Alright, i understand not all are able to read scores and not able to sight read.. BUT at least try to learn and not have the attitude that "but I don't know how to" when someone tries to tell you where should your part be.. (Or you can ask and not assume that you sing along any part that you feel suited to sing.. *faint*).. And ya, felt rather "out of place" with the adult choir (except the main service ones) .. cuz ya..有代沟... seemed like that they are in a clique of their own too... And yes, I do like being in a choral group (like sec sch choir) where we all sang in harmonious parts..(and ya, competing & performing @ syf were fun - cuz legally missing classes!! but i dun like the costume wo.. )

but frankly, not the pple la, but i really need time to sort out what's next... Would tell eileen & idy my decision later..

Chatted for a long while over msn with estelle (oh yea, during work) .. missed u babe.. (though we are like staying 15min walk apart? but sigh, never get the chance to meet up) Hmm didn't know my cgl told u guys I'm doing well in the current cg.. Oh well..am I? I guessed I am.. Afterall, I can survive & excel wherever I want - key to note.. whether i want it [or not].. ya..  i already gave up halfway thru then.. so and whatever happened i just allowed it to.. (maybe as a "retailation" to the frustration of the solo-battle field feeling.. despite of 'promised' help that seemed to be so far off... and the pseudo-ness that fluttered around (by some of the so-called concerned from afar) that aid in the building up fake quotient). nevertheless.. happy to get to know u better.. maybe its like a "one-for-one replacement"?

all in all ya.. bs-ing from the adult choir.. legally.. haha.. cuz ya, that's not my area of calling.. :)

life's short..

Tues choir prac was cancelled. Instead we were asked to head down to the wake of ms nicole lai.. a name that was very foreign to me. Learnt from Jimmy that she was actually the vocal coach of some of the local artistes/ celebrities like stephanie sun.. alright - am a 井底蛙when it comes to cheena stuff.. I was dorned in a pale pink skirt which was not a very appropriate [cuz not "solem"] colour for a memorial service. Oh well, now I know why I was prompted to wear the white shirt in the morning - which i decided against it cuz of the weather.. :(

Presence of God was very strong and tangible moment the memorial service started.. when belle led us thru the pnw songs. And the message that Pastor Meng shared touched the hearts of many - even the vast majority of us who didn't know her personally. Was reminded again.. how fragile life is. And being in this broken down world - anything can happen that could be beyond our control and comprehension. And this thought struck my mind - what if i'm gone in a flash too.. [Oh yeah, I too have this life-long ailment which (God forbids) may lead to the many life-threatening consequences like kidney failure. etc if not in control or the medication loses its effect] But, haven't done what I ought and wanted to.. Life is too short to waste away.. And was reminded of the strained relationship that gone sour .. and dad & mum's salvation.

Like what Pst shared.. though the deceased have departed from this world, yet they still live on - in our memories.. - Thought of one of my P6 good friend - ziyun whom I've lost contact with after sec sch.. (we went on to dhs together, but were in different class) - and only realised that she'd left this world after losing the battle to yah, cancer.. and only learnt of this via sandi who read abt this in a friend's blog. Sigh.. Regretted not making an effort to meet up.. yet, never have the opportunity to again [cuz don't think she's saved.. - greater regrets.. :( ]

Anyway, glad that I had cruxified my flesh and went to the wake.. to share the grief and to minister to the family.. Especially when belle sang the Amazing Grace - it was poof type of presence. :) and the choir sang beautifully and yup guessed we really helped to build the presence .. like what Belle said during debrief, that's the purpose of ministry wo.. Yup, serving not just within the four walls.. but without.. Didn't realise that there were celebrities present.. Utt was there wo.. [but I didn't see him.. :( . cutesy JY was so awe-struck with stephanie sun... and she looked so adorable wo]

Rainbow

Finally caught sight of a rainbow after a few years..:)Think the last i saw was at busstop opposite Tampines Ikea.

All because I took a cab to work. (And it sets my budget back by another $30.) And cuz my eyes were hurting [not too sure why, but they are kinda sensitive, so yup, thank God I dun need foreign aids  to see.. :)]

Actually fell asleep in the cab cuz of my stingy eyes.. When my eyes fluttered open again somewhere near the PSA along Keppel Road.. Wo.. Caught sight of the huge rainbow against the grey backdrop of the darkened sky behind the rows of containers..

Rainbow.. :) Always brighten my day when i caught sight of one!!

Rainbow.. the sign of the convenant between God and the earth.. [Gen 9]

For me.. I wonder if this has sealed what I had asked God for?

.... drive myself...

Darn... another "nitemare"?.. I guessed my over-creative mind was at play.
Gee. Alright, it was not a nightmare, just that it was rather daunting cuz it seemed so real. And the harsh reality of life hits you. It's made-belief, and yet surreal.

所谓日有所思夜有所梦.
It doesn't really help that there might be an element of bumping into @ the break of the dawn or @ the end of the day. Yet you know that what you want is not what He wants, but the silent rebel still harbours that want for it to happen..

sigh.. the fallen nature of man..

Hide & Seek

Every sunday afternoon, I would have to 'endulge" in a round of hide & seek. Oh yes, so far so good, I've managed to avoid and dodge the few that I don't wish to see. It helps that I can be rather sharp in spotting things/people. Sigh, still playing the dodging game. Strangely, those i dodged are those that once upon a time my close pals.

Either the ability to trust in them has dissipated or I dunno how to face them.

Believe...

Blessed.. Saved $$ on cab cuz kei texted me just as I boarded the cab.. thanks to the wonder couple that I got a free ride to church sans the perils of taking public transport! :)

In the midst of the revamped version of "Amazing Grace" [side-track: sighed, we weren't miked up lo, what's the point of the choir singing the choir part? the congregation couldn't hear the choir echo..] , this popped out "Is it that difficult for you to just believe?" Oh well... in a way, yes. A simple word, yet an action too sophisticated for the sophisticated to embrace. TO just believe. And yes.. it is not the quantity of quality sermons you allow to flow through your head. It's what you do with it that matters.And I wanna go, yet there is still the "but" element.  Then the pea-brained one got emo-ed again and put-on the plan-b/c-typesy mindset. Never expected that to be addressed in the sermon moments later.. Reverenced.

The Saturday that's meant for me and myself and i

For a really long time, I've not spend a day with myself. Alright, the hermit in me does love the lone time at times. [thought i've not reached the stage of going on vacations solo yet. (unlike e. Gee, think we have that in common.. loner..haha)
And after much dilly-dallying (such as clearing 3 bags of old/unfitting clothes into the recycling bags - it just happened that sat the recycling guys are collecting the stuff, finding my keys and stuff and packing..) finally got out of the house at close to 11am. Didn't want to run for the bus as I was not in a hurry and boarded bus 3 that came soon after.
And I was surprised that someone called out to me.. Surprise! It was Andrew & Gwen (Alright, they stayed like One bus stop away from me).. haha, and spent the next 40+ minutes updating him on his ex-sheep.. btw andrew was my 1st cgl. Happy to learn that he and gwen are now doing well in Trinty.
Andrew was surprised wo to learn that I'd transferred cg.. sigh.. just attribute to "accumulated disappointment and stuff and prolly ended up backsliding if i don't get out.. " (which was true in essence). Hmm, a shepherd would always care for his flock wo.. - and he still remembers all his sheep.
One of my leaders that I would always respect, despite of what had happened (though i don't know the details la...) but still it was his love and passion for the people that really impacted me..


As with my usual sat regime.. I diligently "torture" my own muscles for an hour, ran another 6k, steamed-bathed "& suana-ed.. And treated myself to a sUnrise and kiddy chicken & mushroom fusilli@ Coffeebean..


Sigh.. not wanting to reach home too early, i walked around pasir ris park.. and nearly headed towards the beach.. haha.. super emo.. but I enjoyed walking.. too bad, no rain...

Cg outing : 05.09.08

Oh well.. I realised, I can't sing ktv for peanuts. Alright, there were no peanuts but i enjoyed the crappy snacks that would make u thirsty. Was entertained though and have fun.. Didn't get to see vory much cuz she was whisked to the other room (with the familyfamily group!!) Silently, I thank God for the ability to sing in tune and not having the problem of pitching (alright, except when I'm nervous - esp in auditions).

Went for cuppa @ tcc @ Centrepointwith kei, summer, martina, jessica @ TCC . think summer and i don't want to head home that early.. [for her.. i guess it was... for me cuz was supposed to meet tien but she was feeling under the weather, so our little nite out session was adjourned. Anyway I just wanna be out... :)] Oh well, it was good though, cuz getting know my cgm.. Time flies, it's been two months already!

Matchazuki Latte !

I heart the red beans that had sunk into the base!

Stop reading...

Sleep...

happy

Cuz my little wish came thru!! And that put a smile on my face... :) that few seconds would last me for at least a week... oh well.. better than nothing... *feel so juvenile!* but.. sigh... can't help it..  nah, just vp... though might not be vp to the mass... but offers some temp thrills to me for the very least until .... vp - a term that violet and i came up with during jc.. definitely not vice president... haha..

I think my endurance level is pretty high.. yUp, i still managed to sneak in a run in spite of that ankle throbbing... Met one of my kep colleague @ the changing room.. rare! :) *cuz most of them actually goes to sky fitness cuz that's the nearest to office... haha we are the rare spieces..

hmmm yeah.. looking forward to Friday.. cuz it's k-nite with cg, afterwhich a nite "rendezvous" with tien..haven't met her for such long while.. since her wedding wo.. and she's been jetting around.. no worries.. I'm very 乖 one.. :) really..

Ouch! and an excuse to get a new pair of shoes...

Think there was some relaying of pipes/cables going on in my estate, else why would there be a mud pile in the middle of the pavement, with barricades around, from my block that led to the pedestrian path along to main path towards the bus-stop. Really a hassle and the next “opening” to the main pedestrian path was like 20m away. Hence, decided to walk on the seemingly firm and solid gravel and sand.

It was a blessing in disguised that I had decided to put on my platform wedge instead of the red (worn once only) flatties, or else, I would be like embedded in quicksand and wasted precious time (and thereby ruining my tights as well) to head home to change.. Oh well, the wedgie did prevented me from being stuck in the “sinking” gravel. Apparently, it was quicksand in disguise!! The gingerly manner that I walked on the unstable ground yielded the following consequences: As I was trying to maneuver my nearly stuck right foot onto the SOLID cement pavement, my dear left ankle turned outwards and my right knee scraped the concrete cement.. Ouch! (for my leftie ankle and my dear right kneecap) The amazing thing was that I managed to picked myself up nonchalantly as if nothing has happened and woo.. self-rotated the ankle back and woo ran to catch the approaching bus at the bustop that was like 100m away.. Was praying under my breath for no bleeding [on the kneecap], no sprain injury while picking myself up and sprinting to the bus, and :)

Amazingly, the Zara tights were uber durable – no tear/ no scratch and my kneecap only suffered this slight bruise and ½ inch vertical abrasion. And yup, my left foot is happily tapping away as I’m typing. Alright, there was some weird sensation at the ankle area (the twisted/sprained feel), but no swelling! Applied some of this wonderful green stuff that I’d stumbled upon while in Taipei the other time on the ankle (yup, cannot find this brand here in Singapore!) – Doctor Burt’s Res-Q Ointment.. And woo… it works wonder..

Thank God for the protection and speedy recovery!

the bruised knee and the lovely [dying] wedgies

And my dear shimmery well-worn wedgies.. The store (heatwave) no longer carried the design, but then, it has been close to a year since I bought them.. NBV= 0, one of my fave pair for work and the cheapest.. (like only $30?) Sigh.. time for retirement.. Managed to wash the muddie off them but there is this lingering gravel stains at the base… yippie.. valid reason for shoe-shopping?

expiry

Evident by the frequency the word appears on this blog, I would appear not to be passionate with regards to what I am doing right now... Oh please.. yes. and yup,  I don't look like I'm an accountant. (Alright, technically speaking, by training, yes, by vocation, yes, by interest - Nope)

Sigh.. just that it brings in the moo-lah...for my insatiable wants & craves.... BUT I want this season to expire soon.. Expire.. expire.. then perhaps, i can curb the spending urge..  Perhaps, that's why i always feel that I speak in new foreign tongues whenever advices are required? Meanwhile.. just save up ba...

oh yes... that's a stench!

Wa. This person has a really bad body odour to extent that the moment he plonked himself on è unoccupied treadmill next to me, i nearly suffocated. I'd another 10min of run to go and boy it was è longest 10min ever.
I couldnt even cool down nxt to him and went to the efx instead to cool down. And its where i took tis pix.
If u are tis non-local with curly hair (not trying to be racist, but usually certain races are endowed with more hair folicles, hence stronger the  , u, cladded in blue tank top n red shorts usg the leftmost threadmill at raffles cali, do spare a thought 4 neighbouring fellow gym mate. Put on deodorant!

Thank God I'm alive still. Not trying to be mean but pple with body odour- my pet peeve.