before this.. after sis karen got off the cab... the spirit of depression tried to creep in... (the sudden depressing thoughts.. came in.. ) with it.. fear tried to come in too.. it was like gonna sink into THAT mode again.. (cuz was kinda overwhelmed by what was required of me.. ~ the summation effect of what boss told me (i'm gonna be VERY busy..no promotion/ no pay rise.. doing work that was similar to what an officer who 2 grades above me is doing)... and as well as my herd of 30+sheep.. tending to them.. and growing them...
but i shut the doors to these spirits... Speaking to xinlian abt the vision for the cg... as well as sharing with her really once again.. ministered to myself... (to side track.. found a suitable/ biblical name for her water baptism... haha... after all the malay/Filippino sounding names... it was a great laugh).. now back to reality...
Frankly... i don't know how to go about doing it... Should I feel privileged or overwhelmed? but God will not put me thru' tasks that I cannot accomplished ... yet... i can feel expansion on the inside... [Thank God not physically... :) the waist is expanding inward... :)] .. it can be done... Yet.. there are choices to be made... I hope I will not be serving for FOP & 17th anniversary though... cuz I know I have to be there..
Still praying for the confirmation word... i can only do it only and only if I know..
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